In which a teenage girl points out the most common clichés in Wattpad books. HR: #1 in rant

Now a digital pilot for SYFY The Society knows when we're going to die. They imprint it on our arms at birth. I was supposed to die yesterday. I'm the girl who's Expired. Winner of the 2020 Readers Choice Awards Cover by @Forcade

***Previously Wattpad Featured Story*** Meet your run-of-the-mill protagonist: Main Character. In this fantasy (spoof) of an epic adventure, Main embarks on a quest to conquer the world, guided only by the words of a drunkard, and a bolt of red lightning. It soon becomes clear that the twelve-foot troll travelling with him is only the start of his increasingly bizarre list of sidekicks. Rising to villainy is harder than it looks, Main realizes; plot twists give him vertigo, and hard work is migraine-inducing. But still, there's a world to conquer, fangirls to run from, and love to fall slave to. What could possibly go wrong? COMPLETED

UNEDITED Gemma Alder is used to being the unlucky one in the Alder family: from a nasty rumour about her back in high school to inexplicable mishaps, she seems to be the comical target for unfortunate situations. But if there's one thing she's good at, it's acting. After she graduated from high school, Gemma remodelled herself and decided to pursue a career in acting-but not in the way you think. Gemma Alder has managed to keep a steady business going across Vancouver Island by playing the fake girlfriend for various customers. Her job is difficult and sometimes it blurs the lines between acting and reality, but it's the only job where she can handle taking orders from the boss: herself. And when a ghost from her past appears, the very ghost that destroyed her reputation back in high school, comes to her, begging her to play the part to get an investor for his company off his back, Gemma take the job without a second thought. Because she sees this as a prime opportunity for revenge. Jake Swift is surprised with Gemma's decision but he's desperate to stop Olive Garcia, a well-known investor, from throwing herself at him. All Jake wants to do is make money and provide for his little sister, Hanna. After their parents died in a car accident, Jake has been the sole guardian of Hanna since he was seventeen and he has no interest whatsoever in a romantic relationship until his little sister has graduated from high school. Long story short, Gemma's agreement is a blessing in disguise. Until, that is, things start to go terribly wrong during his company's two-week getaway to a campground in the middle of nowhere. From unexplainable food poisoning to waxing cream in a sunscreen bottle, Jake can't seem to catch a break, which Gemma is pleased with. However, as time begins to tick away, both Jake and Gemma notice a similarity between themselves which, inevitably, leads to something more. Can the two of them forget the past? Or will their relationship go up in smoke?

"Give me ten days, and I can give you ten reasons not to die." Evan paused. "And if I can't change your mind by then, you can go jump off that cliff."

An ex-couples rivalry for the spot as student body president becomes even more convoluted when two new, unexpected candidates enter the race. Chloe and Preston team up, each vowing to get one member kicked from the competition-- but when they both end up helping their victims to spite each other, the campaign gets a lot more complicated. * * * * * Chloe Peters is determined to solidify her most-popular-girl-in-school status with the label of student body president, so she's furious when three other candidates enter the race. Now, she's competing against her ex-boyfriend Preston McMillan, some nobody named Emily, and the school's notorious troublemaker, Finn Harrel. If it means saving her pride and not letting Preston get the best of her, she'd do just about anything-- even help out Finn, who despite his good looks, gets on her last nerve with his lackadaisical attitude and class-clown antics. Preston McMillan just wants a distraction from the fact that his wrestling team is about to be disbanded. When he signs up for the presidential race, he doesn't expect Chloe to go berserk, nor does he expect to meet Emily, a quiet, stony girl he can't believe he's never noticed before. After deciding to help with her campaign, he's got plenty of distractions-- enough to make him wonder what really matters, and enough to make his friends question where his loyalties lie. One thing's for sure: suddenly, this race is about a lot more than student government. 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐃 (𝐮𝐧𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝) - 𝟑/𝟖/𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟗 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐃 (𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐬) - 𝟏𝟎/𝟏𝟓/𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟗 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐃 (𝐦𝐚𝐣𝐨𝐫 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐬)- 𝟖/𝟐𝟒/𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟎

***Published in the US with Wattpad Books and in the UK under the title 'LOVE, LOCKED DOWN' -- out now in ebook and paperback, and also audiobook in the UK!*** When the London Lane apartment block is put on lockdown, its residents are in for a whirlwind week. Imogen's stuck living with a one-night-stand in Number 14, and has to face the reality that maybe it's time to grow up. Upstairs, Isla and Danny are still in their honeymoon period, and this could make or break their new relationship; meanwhile, Zach and Serena's steady relationship is on tenterhooks, and pineapple on pizza might actually be the last straw. At Number 22, Olivia's Maid of Honour duties are really pushing her to the edge as a wedding-planning weekend has turned into an entire week... And speaking of weddings, this whole thing has made Ethan realise he wants to spend the rest of his life with Charlotte - if only he can surprise her with the perfect proposal. Follow these five stories of twenty-somethings through their week of quarantine, where romances will blossom, friendships fracture, and relationships are forged that could last a lifetime. Disclaimer: This is a fictionalised and dramatised story inspired by real events that are happening right now. For the most up-to-date FACTS on Covid, you can check out https://support.wattpad.com/hc/en-us/articles/360040903132-A-message-about-COVID-19

Abigail Newman lives her life in fear. Growing up in a town called Louxe, Abigail must present herself perfectly every single day. Clothing, actions, attitudes, and even thoughts, are monitored constantly. Any misstep results in severe punishment. When at the public execution of a boy younger than herself, Abigail reacts more openly than deemed acceptable. But, it is through the child's own brother that she finds reprieve. Alexander Wells offers Abigail something she never imagined - freedom. He promises to take her out of Louxe, and into an underground society where imperfection is welcomed. Abigail must risk her life for a chance to live one she believes in. The only problem - if she's caught, it's not just her own neck on the line anymore, but also that of Alex and everyone he holds dear. Never before has it been so important for Abigail to avoid mistakes as it is right now. She hopes she's up to the challenge. **Chapters were a bit long and have been divided into smaller ones for Wattpad. Which will explain the "chapter 4, chapter 4.2, chapter 4.3... etc.) UPDATES EVERY FRIDAY! (And some Mondays as I try to get it published and completed in time for the 2020 Watty Awards). - Highest ranks: #9 in utopiansociety

Demi Adamson has spent two years in a mental hospital after events that she can't recall. Today's the day she makes a leap and runs away, ready to start her real life again and live out her dreams William Kingston is the first man she meets on the outside world. He's a posh man, exactly her type. The duo begin to realise that life keeps making them meet, but why? It doesn't take long for them to fall madly in love, but something's off. When William realises Demi was a suspect in his brother's murder, will that affect their romance? Was Demi the killer? And if so, why did she do it? Warning: contains mentions of death and violence, and mental health. Cover by sheenajansen

This wasn't supposed to happen. He was only supposed to be here for two weeks, tops. And now here we are, sitting in front of my mother, who wants to be his mom too, and trying to find a way out of this mess we've created. This wasn't supposed to happen...but it did. ------------------------------------------------------ Beck Robinson lives with his parents and his younger sister Kylee, except when his parents are fostering. Then there is at least one, sometimes two, other kids in the house. It mostly doesn't bother Beck though, he's used to it. He just carries on as usual playing soccer, hanging out with friends, and working on his graphic novel. Levi Adams and his sister Lily have been in over ten foster homes when they get placed with the Robinsons. Levi shows up with a busted lip, bruised knuckles, and an aggressive attitude. To say the least, Levi isn't exactly thrilled to be in another home or sharing a room with Beck. However, things turn from irritating to downright complicated when Beck catches Levi kissing another guy at school. Will Beck keep Levi's secret, or will Levi be forced out of yet another foster home? ------------------- Cover artwork by: Moyari_08