🍌🍌🍌Think Netflix's SEX EDUCATION, but without the accents, and instead of pictures and sound, I put the words on the screen, and you paint the pictures with your mind.🥒🥒🥒 *** Some guys are showers. Some guys are growers. Then there's Peter. He's got a big secret about a little problem (in his pants). But one day, that secret gets out, and Peter's life is ruined. The guys at his high school mock Peter without mercy. The girls giggle at the idea of dating Peter. But the situation isn't entirely without hope. Peter's best friend Elroy is a wannabe teenage business prodigy who sees Peter's predicament as an opportunity to develop a product that will help him "tap into the bajillion dollar market for addressing male insecurity." Meanwhile, a mysterious art student named Audrey seems to like-like Peter, despite his, ahem, little problem. Which is weird, because the rumor around school is that Audrey is a size queen. Why else would she be collecting so many dick pics? Peter's Little Peter is a story about the truth behind the myths of male sexuality, the awkwardness of teenage romance, surviving high school, and the bumpy road to self-acceptance.

** WATTYS 2018 WINNER ** Big Tech meets Die Hard in this techno-thriller Kirkus Reviews calls "a clever, spirited tale with a brainy, nimble heroine at the helm." From IndieReader's 5-star (highest rating) review: "Bond weaves an entertaining tale filled with deceit, robots, Russians, and tech entrepreneurs that all combine to give the reader a reason to flip pages furiously to find out what might happen next." Deb Bollinger has no time for corporate training. Her company's top engineer at just twenty-seven, Deb has blocked off her day for the one project she truly cares about: the launch of Carebnb, an app that finds spare beds for the homeless. When she's told all employees must drop everything for some busywork exercise called Blackquest 40, it's an easy no. Trouble is, her bosses aren't really asking. Blackquest 40 is the mother of all corporate trainings. A near-impossible project to be completed in forty straight hours. No phones. No internet. Sleeping on cots. Nobody in, nobody out. Deb finds the whole setup creepy and authoritarian. When a Carebnb issue necessitates her leaving the office, she heads for the door. What's the worst that could happen? Armed commandos, HVAC-duct chases, a catastrophic master plan that gets darker by the hour - Blackquest 40 is a fresh take on the Die Hard formula, layering smart-drones and a modern heroine onto the classic action tale. Cover design and illustration by Ethan Scott.

Okie's fifteen. She lives in New York. She's got a few problems: she's failing geography, her dad's a wimp, and her mother, Sumatra, is a stone cold bitch. But things get a lot worse when Sumatra turns into a zombie and eats Okie's dad. Clio, Okie's grandmother, lives in Toronto; but since the zombie apocalypse, Toronto's a lot further away than it used to be. Clio suggests that Okie transport Sumatra across the border, because family is family. But coaching Okie by cellphone isn't easy, and Clio has some zombies of her own to contend with. Luckily she has some garden tools. Naomi Alderman and Margaret Atwood team up for this unusual two-hander. Encompassing love, death, sex, and the meaning of family, The Happy Zombie Sunrise Home will surprise, delight, and convince you of the vital importance of keeping ready supplies of rhubarb and mini-wieners in your freezer at all times. The story unfolds beginning October 24.