my body's wretched, and so is my soul.

"Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" tells of a girl named Alice who falls down a rabbit hole into a fantasy world populated by peculiar, anthropomorphic creatures. The tale plays with logic, giving the story lasting popularity with adults as well as children.

"Through the Looking-Glass, and What Alice Found There" is the sequel to Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. The themes and settings of Through the Looking-Glass make it a kind of mirror image of Wonderland: the first book begins outdoors, in the warm month of May (4 May), uses frequent changes in size as a plot device, and draws on the imagery of playing cards; the second opens indoors on a snowy, wintry night exactly six months later, on 4 November (the day before Guy Fawkes Night), uses frequent changes in time and spatial directions as a plot device, and draws on the imagery of chess.

I attempt to reveal to you the thought processes (or the lack thereof) within my cranium. I may not be known as a completely insane person, but I do tend to think in a strange, funny, and altogether weird way. To say the least this collection is not normal, in fact it is somewhat unoriginal, stupid, pointless, and most likely something you have little interest in, so please feel free to open this pamphlet and have a good laugh (if one is to be found) at my expense. For those of you that have an aversion to reading sheer idiocy, this sad excuse for a book will also contain rants and a few spiritual lessons that have been heard learned and hopefully put in a humorous way.