"We live in the same city yet we've never met. Y?" read 3:39 am

❝I'll make you a deal. You help me piss off my ex, and I'll help you piss off your parents.❞ ❝And how exactly would we do that?❞ ❝Easy. We fake date.❞ [on hold]

❝guys my age don't know how to treat me right❞

TONIGHT WE ARE VICTORIOUS CHAMPAGNE POURING OVER US ALL MY FRIENDS WERE GLORIOUS TONIGHT WE ARE VICTORIOUS IN WHICH ETHAN FINDS LOVE IN A FUN LOVING ACTRESS AFTER SHE POURED CHAMPAGNE OVER HIM, AND TIFFANY IS JUST REALLY SORRY ABOUT RUINING HIS FAVORITE JACKET. [SOCIAL MEDIA]

❝how did i get so lucky?" ". . . you stole my wallet, motherfucker.❞