🍌🍌🍌Think Netflix's SEX EDUCATION, but without the accents, and instead of pictures and sound, I put the words on the screen, and you paint the pictures with your mind.🥒🥒🥒 *** Some guys are showers. Some guys are growers. Then there's Peter. He's got a big secret about a little problem (in his pants). But one day, that secret gets out, and Peter's life is ruined. The guys at his high school mock Peter without mercy. The girls giggle at the idea of dating Peter. But the situation isn't entirely without hope. Peter's best friend Elroy is a wannabe teenage business prodigy who sees Peter's predicament as an opportunity to develop a product that will help him "tap into the bajillion dollar market for addressing male insecurity." Meanwhile, a mysterious art student named Audrey seems to like-like Peter, despite his, ahem, little problem. Which is weird, because the rumor around school is that Audrey is a size queen. Why else would she be collecting so many dick pics? Peter's Little Peter is a story about the truth behind the myths of male sexuality, the awkwardness of teenage romance, surviving high school, and the bumpy road to self-acceptance.

Stolen from his nest as a chick, Marbles the hawk has been a wizard's familiar for his entire life. Compelled to carry 12 magical marbles, and protected by a force field powered by his virginity, Marbles, at the equivalent of 35 hawk years of age, has had enough. He's escaped, and is on a desperate, madcap quest for love. The physical kind. He's managed to enlist a few soon to be dear friends--gnome, human, elf and owl--but he quickly finds that his former master will stop at nothing to get his marbles, and his hawk, back in his grasp.

Cover by: jiba_tree Pirate with one brain cell...on a good day? Check. Extremely specific descriptions and random trivia? This story has it. Wild adventures where no one, and definitely not our heroine, knows what's going on? Read and find out! ... "Good day, good sir," she chirped in as cheerful a voice as she could manage while still being salty over the ship fiasco. "Good day? The sun may be shining and the clouds may be gone, but today is anything but a good day," replied the pirate with a long look. "Who rained on your parade?" went Polly. "I shouldn't bother such a pleasant person as you with my tale," sighed the pirate. He cast a forlorn gaze towards the sea and it really would have been quite an aesthetic moment for a picture taker. "Oh, well then, um, sea you later?" replied Polly who began turning away. "Alas, it was just this morning when I was a younger man and had not a clue what evils would befall me," started the pirate. Coincidentally there was a bench which Polly sat herself down on and a stage which the pirate leaped onto.