Absurdfiction Stories

In Las Sploogas, clothes are extinct, neon lights rule, and fart-powered performances are serious business. Natalie Blauwerth is nineteen, naked, and spectacularly awkward - until she discovers the underground art of neon-fueled fart performance. With chaos, comedy, and a little revenge against an ex who once humiliated her, she rockets to fame, turning embarrassment into applause and trauma into triumph. Funny, bizarre, and utterly unforgettable. Fartwave Rising is a tragicomic sci-fi romp about finding your glow - and owning it, one pulse at a time ⚠️ Warning ⚠️ This story takes place in a futuristic, fully nude world and farting is central to the plot. It contains themes with nudity, bodily functions, trauma, and situations that some readers may find uncomfortable or explicit. If you are sensitive to these themes, then this story isn't for you.

Elarindale International Institution sits in the middle of Nebraska's cornfields-because apparently the most secretive, prestigious British academy in the world decided the American Midwest was the perfect hiding place. Founded in 1911 by the notoriously eccentric aristocrat Winifred Thistlewhack (who may or may not still be alive), Elarindale is a sprawling Gothic castle where students take courses like Interdimensional Ethics, Parachute-Free Skydiving, and Advanced Gaslighting (Honors). The campus has weather-voting privileges, a private underground bullet train, staircases with questionable attitudes, and a cafeteria run by actual butlers. For the brilliant, the strange, and the dangerously curious, it's the school of a lifetime. For Caleb Brooks, it's something else entirely. Twelve years old and painfully normal, Caleb comes from a quiet public school and a life built on routines he understands. When he's suddenly invited into Elarindale's chaotic world of geniuses, impossible classes, and students who seem far more extraordinary than he feels, he's forced to face a question far bigger than any exam: What if normal isn't enough? Caught between the comfort of the life he knows and the terrifying possibilities of the one he doesn't, Caleb must figure out who he is-and who he might become-in a place where the rules are strange, the expectations are enormous, and even the staircases might try to eat you. Absurd. Chaotic. Occasionally profound. Welcome to Elarindale. (You may still want to sign a waiver.)

🥬 The 100-Story Streak: Because Who Needs Sleep?" Join me on this wild journey of daily storytelling, where no idea is too strange, no plot hole is too deep, and no amount of writer's block will stop me (probably).

📄 Series Description (In Voice of Lord Stabs-a-Lot): > Hello Future Fans, Critics, and Possibly My Parole Officer! I am Lord Stabs-a-Lot, Grandmaster of Gentle Mishaps and Self-Appointed Archbishop of the Rotting West Wing. This is my journal, memoir, opera script, spiritual weather report, and emergency confession - all written with enthusiasm and suspicious fluids. What you hold is not just a story. It is an expression of joy, like laughter during surgery, or singing during an exorcism. I lived in a lovely white hotel full of thoughtful restraints, whispering lights, and people who mistook teeth for currency. Then, of course, the invitations came - some were written in blood, others simply screamed in the hallway - and so our adventure began. We made art. We made messes. We made decisions. I wrote it all down, in case reality ever comes back and wants an explanation. If you're here for meaning, you might find something. If you're here for structure, bring glue. If you're here by accident... don't tell the nurses. Yours in enthusiasm, Lord Stabs-a-Lot (Knight of the Unhinged Order, Professional Hug Dealer, Former Anatomy Puzzle Champion) --------------- ⚠️ Disclaimer (From Lord Stabs-a-Lot Himself): Everything in this book is fictional. Especially the parts that feel too specific. All characters, events, names, anatomical stunts, and emotional confetti are completely made up and not based on anyone living, dead, or melting. This book contains absurdist horror, dark comedy, disturbing imagery, and cheerful violence told from the perspective of someone who probably should not be allowed pens. Reader discretion is advised. Especially if you're made of meat.

📖 Story Description: In the oddball town of Bumbleshire-on-Pickle, Barry Crumbleton-better known as Captain Toast (a man who wears actual toast on his head)-runs the world's least effective superhero agency from an old sandwich cart. He has no powers, no plan, and a deeply confused duck as his sidekick. But when the teacups of Mrs. Waffle's Teahouse rise up in rebellion, demanding saucers and respect, Barry must face his silliest challenge yet. Armed only with a legendary Buttered Baguette of Truth and an uncanny ability to make everything worse before it gets better, he sets off to restore peace between humans and kitchenware. Filled with rebellious crockery, heroic baked goods, raccoons on trampolines, and a jazz band made entirely of bread, Captain Toast and the Teacup Uprising is a gloriously ridiculous tale of civil disobedience, lukewarm heroism, and the world's most dramatic cup of tea. ---

When Jaime's Russian dwarf hamster, Chuckles, starts talking, it seems like a joke. Until Chuckles reveals his true plan: the barn, the farm... the world. What begins as a laugh spirals into a chilling fight for control. Because Chuckles isn't anyone's pet-and he's about to prove it. "You called me a pet," he whispers. "Now you'll learn what that really means."