Bawdy Stories

A short and humorous character study told from the character in question's perspective. Written some time ago, this is mostly intended to showcase a certain style of writing. This is also the only piece of personal work - i.e. not a commission - I will probably upload here. Enjoy.

I must be honest with you if you are here to stop by and read what I have to tell you. I know myself, I am not only bad but bawdy and annoying as hell. Oh I don't think that we've met before? My name is Dean Patterson. Well the story I am willing to tell you is about a girl, for sure. She is cute, pretty, beautiful and very decent. I mean very very decent. But dude you have to believe me, she is beautiful. Seriously I am not exaggerating anything. I am crazy about her. Crazy, kind of "I may kill you if you take a second look at her boobs" crazy. You see where I am getting to? Yes you'll be dead by the end of the story. End of.