NaiOkami
You.
Do you see me?
Do you see what I see?
Know my secret thoughts?
There was a time I remember,
I remember you told me
"You are not hard to read, you are transparent."
I remember I had felt offense,
but afterwards I had felt happy,
and then dejected, but now...
Now I know it to be a lie.
You cannot see,
you cannot see me.
Cannot look at me and automatically know what I am thinking,
as my childish self before might have hoped.
I know now that you are blind.
You look at me and see a friend and I will look at you and my eyes will reflect a friend.
But I look at you again,
look when you are not looking and lift my mask a little.
In that moment when you aren't looking,
in that moment when you can't see me,
I take advantage of the freedom and dream a happy dream.
You hold me,
and I will laugh for you.
I hold you,
and you will smile for me alone....
Ah, you are turning back to me.
No. You cannot see.
I will never let you see the hidden secret I hold from you.
I'll slip my mask back.
My dearest friend.
My dreams are curses,
I could never hope upon them,
because they are things that mock me.
Ah. You cannot see.
For if you did, I would surely lose you.
And losing you could never be worth the risk.
I cannot lose you.
So I'll stay your friend.
And you shall stay as mine.
Like that, I can always keep you close.
Like that, you will always keep me close.
This mask will stay on.
This mask will keep me quiet.
You'll never utter what I wish to hear.
I'll never say what I wish to speak.