Condom Stories

I wrote this story as a joke for my friends, and It's about our 67 year old English teacher Britta. We have an inside joke about her and Bruno Mars since she talks about him and plays/ sings his music a lot. It's gonna be from Britta's pov and yes, I know Bruno mars is 36, but we'll ignore that... Also English isn't my first language so please don't bully me, and the only fanfics I've read are Hermione x reader when I was like 9. A lot of the things Britta says in this story are direct quotes/ things she has said for example telling us her whole life story once a week or talking about cum, and the students are supposed to present me and my friends and things we have done even tho I don't use our real names.