Crudehumor Stories

Picture is by GENZOMAN on Deviant art. The picture is his not mine. This is a story of a grizzled man named "Neoptolemus" and his only daughter "Helen" in Ancient Greece as they confront the gods evil men. Neoptolemus must confront his hate and fears in order to achieve his greatest goals.

Mostly one liner conversations between Frank and Sadie Doyle written in a screen play type style. Warning: Prepare for crude humour Cover art isn't mine. credit goes to rollingrabbit on Tumblr

A young Italian girl named Angelina, lives in Naples, Italy. She has 3 other siblings, Joanna, (youngest) Herself, (2nd youngest), Erika, (3rd youngest) and Anthony, the eldest. Their father died 5 years ago to a heart attack. He was only 44. Their mother, Laura, had thought this over for a long time. She was thinking about arranging a marriage for Angelina. "Angelina, come here for a moment." Called her mother. "Yes Ma." Angelina called back. "I have something to tell you, I arranged a marriage for you!" She said happily. Angelina's world came crashing down. "What?! Ma, I don't want this!" She shouted at her Mother. "It's Arranged."

From Imagination to memory. My love asked me to tell her a fantasy love story sooooooooo, this is what I got so far. Hope you enjoy. Feedback is appreciated. Be nice pls.

Follow the adventures of Johny , a 12 year boy who moves from Weeki Wache , Florida to Gravity Falls , Oregon . Warning ... There might be some jokes that are a little bit more dark then what small children are used to .

A guy who believes that things are going sideways only during the December and how he gets hope out of that one December that's going to change his entire life.

After the team saved the day from Alexa and her minions, the leader became trans and along with a new lover, they protected everyone from evil time and time again! But, a new threat has arrived, will the team be able to take down this new threat? Time to find out!

This is a book about a woman who just keeps having bad luck. Will she find a relief? Will her story have a happy ending? Read and find out.

David ends up falling down a rabbit hole. Cover art done by @quentinobambino on Tumblr

Edgar has never had anything to worry about. He has always lived a great life in a small town. One day a strange woman knocks on his door. He opens the door and nobody is there but there is a strange map with very strange markings. He soon learns that this map contains the coordinates to a treasure in an ancient abandoned city. What caused the inhabitants to be forced out of the city? Will this treasure make Edgar wealthy or will it cause all hell to break loose?

made by Jonhathon Rand Reacreated by Brianna blythe AKA me.

This world is full of fantasies some can and most cannot imagine. Cute creatures, ugly creatures, big and small. Robots-- wait. Robots? Yep. Synthetics and half breeds as well. I welcome you to Beyterra. A city where there are a shit ton of robots and a shit ton of criminals. Follow three heroes and an idiot to stop an organization, that intends to destroy almost every living thing. But that's only the small of their problems.

Don't get confused by the title, there's many ways you can eat someone up in this world. All it takes is one family to be dynamic. Could destroy you from the inside out or start diving into the flesh on your body. Ripping you apart with their bare teeth and then gouging your heart out with venomous words.

Jonachris never asked for the world to fall apart right when school was ending. War is rising. People are changing. And nothing around him feels honest anymore. He tries to keep his head down, pretend life is still normal. But the more he ignores the signs, the louder they get. Secrets in the hallways. Whispers about his name. Eyes watching him like they already know the end of his story. When everything snaps at once, Jonachris is pushed into a truth he never wanted. A life planned without his permission. A path he didn't choose. And a future that keeps reaching for him whether he's ready or not. Some people are born to change the world. Others find out by accident. Jonachris never liked either option.

Here are the lyrics to the song about time, from the YouTube video "Don't Hug Me I'm Scared 2", the second installment to the "Don't Hug Me I'm Scared" series, created by Becky Sloan and Joseph Pelling. I didn't come up with anything, or any of the lyrics. I just got bored and decided to recite the lyrics to the viral video. Enjoy, I guess.