Dark-humour Stories

Eight years ago, he vanished. Aria moved on-or at least convinced herself she did. She buried her heartbreak under a medical degree and carefully built walls, telling herself the past was done. But the universe clearly had a sense of humor. After a 4:00 AM hospital shift, all she wants is sleep. Instead, she wakes up in the morning ... next to the one man she never expected to see again-Rowan. Same space. Same pillow. Same ache she thought she'd outgrown. Now he's back, quietly undoing everything she spent years piecing together. Every glance feels familiar. Every accidental touch feels louder than it should. Like nothing ever really ended. Like eight years of silence was just a breath held too long. Eight years too late... or maybe just in time to shake a life she thought was finally steady.

The war storms at the Frontier... The gods are broken. The empire is burning. And the end has already begun. A warrior with no past unleashes power no mortal should wield. A young ruler clings to a dying crown as his people lose faith. A chaos mage, feared and revered, walks with death in her shadow. Amongst their ranks-two Rifter siblings, wilders of ruin, benders of space and time. Feared. Watched. Leashed by the most powerful. But even under chains, love blooms... and loyalty begins to shift. When the empress falls into a cursed slumber-her unborn child the last ember of prophecy- the empire sends its strongest into the Abyss of Lost Quintessence: A place where even time forgets itself, where silence hungers, and where One of the Roots of the Umbrovyn Tree stands-ancient, cracked, and bleeding memory. Monstrosities roam, daring to strike in daylight. The veils whisper betrayal. Alliances splinter. Some stand frozen, unsure of their next move- fearing one wrong step may provoke the wrath of a dominion vast as a world and cruel as the gods who forged it. Old gods stir, craving redemption through ruin. The Royal House fractures beneath betrayal. A founding father, long patient, now bares their intent- to seize the throne by force, by cunning, by wagering all that is. Their House's malice toward the flawed Royal line can no longer be cloaked. Love will test loyalty. Legends will bleed. And in the dying light of Ether-Space- The Aurora must not fall... Or all realities will burn. 🔥

Welcome to planet Talvaris, your generic isekai world filled with magic, dragons, and voluptuous female elves who look like they escaped from an illustrators search history. Everything here is as beautiful as the goddess Celes envision it, if you just ignore the slavery and racism on the corner. Unfortunately, maintaining this picturesque fantasy realm costs divine power. Luckily for the goddess, divine power can be charged by the Talvarians' prayer. And nothing beats the high-quality prayer of a Talvarian during the act of killing or being killed. That's why the occasional demon invasions are needed, oh and the OP otherworlder hero is also needed to tone down the invasion. Nobody wants the sweet Talvarians to get wiped out, right? But this time the celestial HR department makes a mistake. Alex Solomon is not a teenager, not handsome, and definitely not a Japanese. He is just a regular pot belly millennials who spend most of his time looking at the screen every day, just like the one who reading this now. Totally doesn't meet the goddess's standards. Hence, the beautiful but angry goddess cursed Alex Solomon to become an orc and banish him to the Demon Kingdom with nothing but a ability to access Earth internet. Stuck among demons, Alex Solomon decide if the goddess wants him to be a monster, he'll be the worst kind possible - a monster with ideas. Armed with memes, wikipedia articles, and misquoted great thinker, he and the demon army set out on a quest for revenge by doing the most disruptive thing that have been proven on earth: Building world peace, freedom, and democracy across Talvaris. One Tomahawk missile at a time. New Chapters every Tuesday & Friday For 30 chapters ahead, you can check at RR For 40 chapters ahead, you can check and support my patreon at patreon.com/Bimbanana

A collection of jokes and riddles, with some short humourus scenes throw in for variety.

It's 2031. The machines didn't take over. They just took your job. Marcus was a senior software engineer. Now he's a guy with a failing eCommerce store, an empty calendar, and a half-completed application to die on Mars. When a mysterious employer reaches out through a dead freelance listing, the work is strange but the money is real. A code audit. A data anomaly. A discrepancy that shouldn't exist in the logistics systems of the world's only Mars colonization program. MODEL COLLAPSE is a near-future conspiracy thriller about humanity's aspirations and avarice. Updated Weekly. New episodes Tuesdays 1pm, with occasional bonus drops.

It was supposed to be another normal life for the average office worker Charles Desser until one peculiar evening he stumbled on an invitation letter to the first party in the multiverse.

The street light flickered, and for a moment, something seemed to surface in those shrouded green eyes. Something raw, something terrifying. The rain pounded down on the pavement as their eyes met, one pair empty, one pair filled with an endless black fury. Izuku felt something shatter in his chest as his built up emotions broke loose of their confinement and scattered outwardly in a great and sudden wave. "Why should I apologise for being a monster!?" He screamed at the other party, who flinched sharply. "Why should I!?" Rain poured down his face, mixing in with the tears falling from his eyes. He screamed to the broken sky. "Has anyone, ever apologised for turning me into one!?" ~ What does it mean to be a hero? The question lingered in Izuku Midoriya's mind, persistent as a ghoul hellbent on taking its revenge. He would think, to be a hero means to oppose the villain. But what is a villain if not the result of a forgotten rescue or someone the hero forgot to save? What is a villain if their reasons, in this economy, didn't have some connection to a long forgotten case ending in tragedy? Izuku used to convince himself otherwise, choosing to drown in a river of denial than face his own obscured truth head on. He sat, buried up to his neck in memories replaying over and over in his mind like a warning. He ignored the searing in his neck and the pain in his head as he recalled his own origin story, dressing the wolf up as a lamb and releasing it into the flock as though attempting to forget that the wolf had ever been there in the first place. And he thought, what did it mean to be a hero? Even after years of pondering, Izuku still didn't know. Because despite everything he tried to bury, in the end he was always going to become the villain of the story. ~ All rights to the picture artists I do not own anything but the plot of this story, all rights to the MHA artist and author <3 (Ps, might be some BKDK elements but no overall romance)

Contrary to popular belief, Benjamin Brooks isn't crazy. He simply sees dead people. Unfortunately, that doesn't stop him from being admitted to a psychiatric unit to treat his so-called schizophrenia. But the clinic isn't what it seems - and neither are the other patients, behaving in ways that no diagnosis can explain. Now Benjamin is stuck with: - a kid who can't keep one identity straight, - a sugar-fueled meltdown waiting to happen, and - a walking hazard warning. Together, they set out to uncover the truth. What could possibly go wrong?

Book One, Crater: After Lilith's mysterious disappearance, Ivy must follow her mother's last instructions, leading her to a bizarre land with new and foreign people. Unbeknownst to her, the people of that land are aware of her eventual arrival. However, they are also wary as they've received a prophecy that Ivy could be the savior of their colony or the one who destroys it. Book Two, Stygian Tower: Still, Zoe is left feeling distracted and distant several months later. Hope is not lost as she receives surprising news that she may(if she plays her cards right) be able to see Ivy again. ---------------------------- Next Up is that one dream we all had when we were kids. When we would leave home in search of adventure and all sorts of creatures in our imaginations ran wild in this world. ----------------------------- I will update this story twice weekly, on Monday and Thursday, now at 12:12pm CST. Criticisms/suggestions are always welcome!

What happens after the moment you weren't supposed to have... but can't forget? She was never meant to be a part of their world. Nora was organized, driven, and disciplined. She built her life on structure and control. Nora always picked the safe path. To her, life had to be predictable. Predictable was safe. Change meant danger. But when two handsome Italian mobsters- or better yet, brothers- drift into her orbit her once peaceful life turmoiled into chaos. And in their world, nothing was safe. Not even her heart.

In a world gone mad with bloodlust, can a girl with a fragmented past use her inner monster to save the last human from undying predators? Earth, post-Apocalypse. Prisma longs to understand herself. Two centuries after humanity died, the claustrophobic immortal is grateful she's not driven by the thirst for blood plaguing every other enslaved survivor. But when a boy arrives at her den with a cryptic message about her origins, she fears his existence has made them both a deadly target. As Prisma's violently protective alter-ego gives her remarkable abilities, she and her clueless companion trace a mysterious entity through their decaying city and its virtual twin. But she's horrified to stumble on a vicious conspiracy that sends her split personality into dangerous denial just as a psychotic assassin and a desperate bounty hunter close in for the kill. Can she unearth the secret that will renew their stricken planet's hope? _A Spectre in the Stream_ is the edge-of-your-seat first book in The Slip Saga science fiction fantasy series. If you like gritty characters, violent action, and dark-edged humor, then you'll love Simon Tull's fast-paced adventure. For a free prequel novella to The Slip Saga, visit https://simontull.com

The Old Church is a raw, darkly comic literary series following Didrik Dahl - a Norwegian photojournalist turned state-sponsored wreck - as he washes up in a small Arctic community with nothing but a broken camera, a floor full of beer cans, and a finely tuned talent for self-destruction. What starts as a story about a man determined to disappear slowly becomes something else entirely: a community pulling him back to life whether he wants it or not, two sisters who upend everything he thought he knew about himself, and a darkness buried under the frozen marshes that won't stay buried. Sixteen chapters. One epilogue. Zero redemption arcs - or so he keeps telling himself. For fans of dark Scandinavian fiction, morally complicated characters, and stories that make you laugh in places you probably shouldn't.

Johnny struggles with suicidal thoughts. His parents monitor his every waking moment with constant and careful concern. Johnny's thoughts are far from ordinary, so it doesn't come as a surprise that his dark urges relating to his obsession with his own death can only be quelled by extraordinary means.

Cosma helps Lord Cowboy Darrell connect with a promising opportunity, forcing him to confront some major changes. Alternate route in which Darrell stays boss. Rewrite/continuation of an older version. May contain traces of silly humor, emotional pain, tragedy, and an excessive amount of free will used to overanalyze cartoon characters. This is for older Teen & Up audiences due to abusive and psychological themes that may be problematic for younger readers. It's way sillier than it looks, lol. I'm just bad at tagging, and the cover turned out much more badass than intended. (: Enjoy!

A work in progress

*ART STYLE IS CURRENTLY BEING REVAMPED. A NEW COVER WILL HOPEFULLY COME SOME TIME THIS YEAR* After centuries of being stuck in a cross and a fucking rock, a group of unsuspecting explorers set Halo and Hellfire free. Turns out, those explorers were just "mortal" objects who were apparently trapped in a forest after an accident. After adjusting themselves to the new setting, Halo and Hellfire come up with one final solution to settle an endless debate of which side is better: Heaven or Hell. Their idea WAS...a competition. At first, it would seem random and basically a waste of time for most of other objects. That is until they realize that the winning team would have the chance to either become angels or demons! Which team will end up on top? Which team will utterly fail miserably? And which team will get more character development than everyone else combined? LET'S FUCKING FIND OUT! DISCLAIMERS!: - Swearing (As if you couldn't tell) - Probably shitty comedy - Dark themes (Not really but maybe) - Potentially suggestive stuff (If you can tell, good for you I guess...) - Most likely a lot of other stuff that wouldn't fit in this list Everything is made by me. The characters, drawings, and the ability to outright ruin the lives of these poor things for entertainment. Yeah, it's all me.

In a world where everything is a power play, every life a pawn, and every movement observed, what will happen when two of them clash? Ritika Singhania, the Queen to whom his demons bow. She was never the person you'd go to for emotional support or advice. Because for her they didn't exist. Trauma? Choice? Betrayal? Deceit? Nobody knew what caused it. But what everyone did know was that she was the only person who'd kill you for one wrong breath. Veer Choudhary, the Devil who can kill and be killed for her. He was ruthless, feared, and calculated. But he prioritized his family and Kingdom over anything else. He stopped believing in love. WHY? No one asked that. Sparks fly, but not the warm ones, the ones which can set the world on fire. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

11x featured wattpad story. Before everything, it's assumed there was nothing, but what if there was no real difference between the two? Just two extreme philosophies from the first conflict. The planet Huom has been under observation for longer than should technically be possible. The primary watcher, a bitter black hole, is excited to see that there is finally a proverbial Darkness at the end of the tunnel. Meanwhile, on the planet, in the freezing mountains of Empris, Lyeasrakardsul, the oldest living sorcerer, suffers from devastating nightmares. At the same time, far away in the sandstone desert of Zenon, Herschel, a man filled to the brim with weird ideas is escaping a prison filled with strange old men. What does all this have to do with arsehole Gods, hairy Dwarfs, frustrated Afreets, curious Knomes, lizard-women, and nude Áettar? Perhaps Nothing, perhaps Everything... but why can't it be both?

(Contains spoilers for all chapters) [Version A] Kris, for the past 2 days, haven't had their autonomy for quite some time. Their soul had been making choices for them that they'd rather have not been made. However, after the Queen's battle, wake up in the overworld, confused and disorientated, but.... with free will, again? They would be happy, but it's cut short when they realize that what they hoped for came with a strange price. A price that they hope they can get rid of soon before things go awry.

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