MS_jk113a
To lose the ability to smile from the heart, possessing only a clown's smile, a "laughing-and-weeping smile."
To be forced by circumstances to live a life that isn't yours, to assume a persona that isn't yours, and to repeat words that don't carry the pulse of your letters, as if they weren't born from the womb of your nature.
To lose the motivation for anything new, for the soul to wander, not knowing what it wants, where it's going, or when it will stop.
A feeling that overwhelms you that the past wasn't yours, but rather you were merely a chess piece moved according to the whims of others, aided by your love for some, your trust in others, or perhaps your good intentions.
That fear of the unknown that makes you cling to the present, which you reject from the depths of your being.
All these contradictions clash until you receive a message from your soul, your heart, and your mind, saying,
"Dear human, your reserves of resistance have run out. Please replenish your spirit and soul with hope and life."