Drunkenantics Stories

**ENGLISH ISN'T MY FIRST LANGUAGE** ''Baby, have you had any surgery that would change your reproductive organs?'' ''No..'' ''Then how could I possibly have gotten you pregnant?'' ''With your sperm'' Harry deadpanned and it made Louis snort. ''Right my sperm but I don't think my sperm is so advanced that it can knock up men'' Louis explained. ''OR! what if s'like the virgin mary... but like gay?'' Harry whispered.

Summary: AU-Everyone Lives. A celebratory banquet to thank the allies of Erebor after the Battle of Five Armies goes slightly(very) awry. Maybe Thranduil shouldn't have commented that dwarves were just drunken ruffians... A/N: In gratitude for Vala 411's very kind birthday present (my precious) of a story about Hiccuping dwarves, I may have volunteered to treat her to some drunken elves. I take no responsibility for any consequences or elvish embarrassment. And I may have got carried away...feels crept in...and a conga line... Disclaimer: The Hobbit was written by JRR Tolkien. Film rights remain with New Line Cinema.

As the old saying goes all is fair in love and war.