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In this humorous retelling of Harry Potter's sixth year, Harry finds an old Potions textbook that seems to belong to someone calling themselves the "Half-Blood Prince." This book contains spells even Hermione hasn't heard of. Just in time, a new magical app called WizTok starts trending among Hogwarts students, giving them a platform to share their new spells. Soon, WizTok is flooded with students performing all kinds of inventive spells, from the humorous "Harry Potter Spell" that makes the caster look like Harry to the tricky "Vengeful Bird Spell."
Meanwhile, Ron's forced to date Lavender since he's too afraid of her vengeful spirit to break up with her. And Dumbledore barges in on Harry's art class for some private lessons, in which he reveals they'll be exploring Voldemort's past to uncover weaknesses that might help them defeat him. However, Hermione insists on horning in on each lessons. One particular memory proves to be the most important: a young Voldemort supposedly asking what a "horchata" is. Harry needs all the luck he can get to find the real memory from Hogwarts' newest professor, even if it means covering himself in lucky perfume.
When Voldemort's ultimate plan is revealed, the final showdown begins in an underwater cave at Stoney Cove. The zombie battle that unfolds pushes Harry to his limits, or just to the surface. After a heart-stopping flash of green light on top of the Astronomy Tower, he barely escapes a mob of angry Hogwarts students, set off by the real Half-Blood Prince, along with a Mr. Spitty Pants. The ordeal leaves him running for his life, knowing that the final fight with Voldemort will be unlike anything he's faced before, including Quirell's two faces.
This is a fan fiction parody retelling of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by J.K. Rowling, written for non-commercial use.
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