mysteriousmissy26
Missy Shell-Wataru is an eighteen-year-old Appalachian witch, Pokémon Trainer, rodeo champion, and proud wife of Indigo Champion Lance Wataru.
She has no desire to inherit his job.
Unfortunately, after defeating three Elite Four members, Missy realizes that beating Lance would make her Champion-and saddle her with his paperwork.
So she convinces her Pokémon to throw the match.
Lance catches her immediately.
Soon, Missy is dragging Lorelei to Walmart for caffeine, snacks, fishing gear, hunting supplies, pajamas, emergency Budweiser, and NEWT supplies.
Then Ilvermorny is invited to Hogwarts as the fourth Triwizard Tournament school. Missy arrives with Jessica, two Rapidash, spinning lassos, rodeo stunts, Daisy Dukes, cowboy boots, American pride, and country music blasting through the Great Hall.
With Lance watching through a live Pokégear connection, Missy turns an international magical event into a Kentucky rodeo-and notices how much he enjoys the view.
Lorelei can read lips.
What follows is a war of Pokémon innuendos, falling Elite Four members, blue Poké Balls, suspicious references to Arbok, Onix, Steelix, Dragon Dance, cold showers, and one increasingly miserable Champion everyone keeps pitying.
The Triwizard Tournament hasn't even started.
Europe is already doomed.