Barthro
Meet Noah Thompson-31, midlife crisis unlocked way too early. Thinning blonde hair, dead black eyes from crunching shady numbers at Shadow Corp (a company so sketchy it probably files taxes in crayon, lol). Dreams? Gone. Hopes? On life support. Social life? Just him and a judgmental microwave at 2 a.m., sharing sad burritos.
But hey, there was Emily from HR-gorgeous auburn curls, killer smile, the one person who made cubicle hell bearable. Two years of flirty lunches later, Noah scraped together a modest sapphire ring, rehearsed his proposal 4,872 times, and popped the question over soggy park sandwiches.
Emily's reply? A brutal takedown worthy of its own TED Talk: "Pathetic. Clingy. No future." Bonus bomb-she's dating Marketing Chad. Noah's heart didn't break; it straight-up imploded.
Cue blackout drunk on cheap whiskey, stumbling into traffic with a slurred "Screw it all," and a very personal meeting with a white van. Crunch. Game over.
...Except nope! Noah wakes up seventeen, ripped, with wild black hair and glowing red eyes straight out of an anime OP. New name: Noda Inferno. New world: floating islands, cinnamon-scented lava rivers, kids commuting on fire dragons.
Now our ex-corporate zombie has to fake his way through magic academy, accidentally torch half the campus, and figure out why this body's fire powers are stupidly OP-all while realizing that maybe, just maybe, getting yeeted by that van was the ultimate glow-up.
Join Noda as he wings it through spells, chaos, and a loud-as-hell new mom, turning his trash past life into legendary flames.