Sarcastic Stories

'If you're done staring then please sit down' - Christian Valentino © sugarfairy1976 Best rankings! #1 sarcastic #1 sm #1 cute romance #1 Chloe #2 boss #4 millionaire #5 Christian #5 possessive #6 billionaire #8 humour #22 romance Under construction

"I'm not the villain. I'm not the heroine either. And at this point- I'm starting to think that might be a problem." Hi. I'm Amanda. Or... I was. Now I'm stuck in someone else's body-Cassiane's-and apparently, she had a lot going on. I thought transmigrating would mean a fresh start. Maybe some plot armor. Maybe even a dramatic glow-up. Instead, I got chaos. And whatever this story is... it's definitely not going the way it's supposed to.

Anaya Rajvansh had everything once-a loving husband, three beautiful children, and a family she believed she could trust. Unfortunately, she trusted the wrong people. She believed every lie they told her, ignored every warning from the people who genuinely loved her, and pushed away the one man who had always stood beside her-Armaan Rathore. By the time Anaya discovered the truth, her marriage, family, reputation, and happiness were already destroyed. Then she died. But fate gives her one impossible gift. A second life. A second chance. Anaya wakes up ten years in the past-with every memory intact. This time, she knows exactly who betrayed her. But instead of confronting them, she does something far more dangerous. She pretends to be the same innocent, easily manipulated Anaya they remember. She smiles. She agrees. She trusts them. And secretly watches them walk straight into the traps they're creating for themselves. But while Anaya is busy planning revenge, there's one problem she never anticipated... Armaan. The husband she once failed to trust. The man who notices that his supposedly naïve wife is suddenly hiding far too many secrets. And then there are their three chaotic children-sensible Aadhya, mischievous Reyansh, and adorable little Siya-who turn Anaya's carefully planned second life into an unpredictable comedy of errors. This time, Anaya doesn't want to simply punish the people who destroyed her. She wants to save the family she lost. Because in her first life, she trusted the wrong people. In her second, she's going to let the wrong people trust her. 😌

Dhara is ready for her new phase of life... Her college life! Her dream college is waiting for her . Hopefully she finds good friends.. When you are innocent and shy you really need good friends to cope up. She just hopes everything will be fine and will graduate one day without any hurdles. She has got good brains , making her life easy in the college, but wait , is that it? she needs to survive here! What happens in her college that her whole perspective of life changes?... Life is beyond marks, life is beyond responsibility and life is beyond ones imagination. Who will teach her this? This guy Max short for Manveet is one of the arrogant yet popular guy she would least want to encounter... He never believes in love because of his horrible past. He believes only in friendship. According to him to gain respect every one must be scared of him.... He has continued that legacy. What happens when he is proved wrong..? What happens when their souls crash?! With so much of confusion and hatred will they understand eachother, will they break each other's mindsets. Will they change each others perspective of life? Sounds cliche, but I tried to be more realistic I put lot of effort into this just to produce something good so don't copy, even if you do all the best. _________________________________________ Do give this book a chance. Slowly EDITING

🌊 The AU setup Poseidon + Thalassa (our sea-goddess mother) ☀️ Apollo - older brother 🌙 Artemis - older sister 🌊 Percy - youngest brother Age gap: Apollo and Artemis are 20 years older than Percy. Percy's domain: Freedom 👑 Status: Youngest Olympian EVER

I accidentally almost killed someone with magic. My mother disappeared right after. And now I'm stuck in England with the grandmother she spent sixteen years warning me about. Tabetha Clarke is rich, terrifying, suspiciously wrinkle-free, and lives in a mansion full of silent servants who disappear when nobody's looking. Literally. Then there's the cat. The demon accusations. The midnight exorcisms. And the tiny little issue of my magic feeding off living things. Apparently, that's bad. Now everyone's acting like I'm either destined to become the most powerful witch in the family... or the reason it finally destroys itself. Personally, I'd just like one normal day and maybe a waffle that doesn't come with emotional trauma.

A girl who loves to surf and swim got into some trouble at a certain beach, and meets a special lifeguard...... An/ I own this story but not Bondi rescue or the lifeguards. I only own Riley. All covers and pictures aren't mine! Enjoy the book!

I just wanted to survive the chapter. He decided to rewrite the whole book. In the bestselling novel Shadows over Neo-Veridia, my role was simple: be a nameless background extra, stay out of the way, and definitely don't get murdered by the city's most terrifying, masked criminal mastermind .But I was running late, my bangs were a disaster, and I used the tinted window of his armored car as a mirror. When the glass slid down and the scarred, green-eyed monster pointed a silenced gun at my forehead, I didn't scream like the original heroine. Instead, I accidentally broke the villain's brain. Now, the plot is completely off the rails. The insufferably arrogant golden hero thinks I'm a damsel, the cloyingly sweet heroine won't stop trying to 'heal' me with friendship, and the most dangerous man in the city is stalking me through the subway lines. Worse? He keeps leaving ridiculously expensive luxury pastries on my fire escape with notes ordering me to cross the street safely. I'm terrified for my life, but on the other hand, the economy is terrible and free croissants are free croissants. Can an extra survive the dark romance villain when she's the one he's completely obsessed with?

❝I never used to believe in soulmates, but now I find myself questioning every thought I once had about love. It was almost as though love was too weak a word for what I felt for him, that perhaps soulmate is indeed the correct term. Perhaps every step I've ever taken has been to find him.❞ Despite not even knowing each other's names before senior year, Diana Elington and Noah Jackson find their lives intertwined with one another. Noah became her gravity; the very essence keeping her grounded. Diana became his oxygen; entangled with his lungs, allowing him to breathe. Together, they could create universes. The art of falling in love is never simple, and Diana begins to realize that her once ordinary, black and white world would soon be showered in colour because of a boy named Noah.

My bumass X+L story it (warning: it's buns and if u don't know me you'd read this unironically regardless-

Book 1 of the IRON ANTHEM series #1cocky(1st April 2026) #3 adventurous (3rd April 2026 #11 brave (3rd April 2026) #70 music (3rd April 2026) You..." I whispered, my voice barely there. His eyes landed on me. "You've got to be kidding me..." he muttered under his breath. "Oh HELL no!" I snapped, stepping back. "Not you. Anyone but YOU " "Are you joking father," he said, looking straight at his father. "This... this is the girl? This is the girl you wanted me to marry?" "THIS GIRL?!" I gasped. "Oh, I'm sorry, did you expect someone who will faint at your feet and bow to you?!" "Well ...... yes" he said flatly "Now to think about it you totally deserved that slap, cuz i have never met a sick and arrogant asshole like you before" I muttered. "You assaulted me," he said calmly while crossing his arms. "I DEFENDED MYSELF!" I fired back immediately. "This is ridiculous," I muttered, pacing. "I refuse. I absolutely refuse. I am NOT marrying a narcissistic, bathroom-invading, ego-with-legs!" "And I'm not marrying a violent, dramatic, loud-" "Finish that sentence," I warned, turning sharply. He smirked. "Crazy woman." He said snorting under his breath. My eye twitched. "Oh, you're dead," I said sweetly. (This is not the real chapter multiple parts have been removed.😅) Read for more😉 ************ Scarlet Davidson is an adventurous girl who wants nothing but to be happy. But a single reckless mistake and her life is turned upside down, She is betrothed to Jay K,the cocky, infuriatingly perfect son of her father's business partner, The band leader of her favourite boyband, and......and the same bloody man she slapped for barging into a female washroom. He's arrogant, she's fiery... neither of them wants marriage. He is control, she is chaos. Surrounded by friends, lies, and secrets, can they both survive this unplanned betrothal? Or will hatred turn into something far more dangerous... or irresistible?

A wickedly funny collection of razor-sharp witticisms, deadpan observations, and brutally honest life truths from Spes Semper-for anyone exhausted by modern life, difficult people, family chaos, social media madness, aging knees, workplace absurdity, and the general decline of common sense. Part survival guide, part social commentary, part elegant emotional support in book form, Semper Said It So You Don't Have To delivers clever, caustic humor with wisdom forged through experience, disappointment, and repeated exposure to humanity. Perfect for readers who love sophisticated sarcasm, dark humor, and laughing at the beautiful disaster that is adulthood.

Follow an aspiring wizard who found himself in the middle of a civil war as a common archer. Witness a new history of a dying empire being forged with iron and blood, as he struggles to uncover the secrets of magic.

Baeu Swan moved to Forks for one reason: peace and quiet. At sixteen, he's tired of constantly moving because of his stepfather's sports career. Living with his father, the town's police chief, seems like the perfect way to finally settle down. Then he meets Edythe Cullen. She's beautiful, strange, impossibly fast, and definitely not human. Soon Baeu discovers that vampires and werewolves are real, and that Forks has considerably more going on beneath its rainy exterior than he ever wanted to know. But unlike some people, Baeu has common sense. When told to stay away, he stays away. When faced with something potentially dangerous, he prepares. A cross around his neck, holy water in glass bottles, wooden stakes, and a double-barrel shotgun loaded with silver slugs might seem excessive. Baeu considers it basic preparedness. Unfortunately, surviving the supernatural isn't quite that simple. Not every vampire is a monster, not every werewolf is an enemy, and sometimes the giant wolf trying to kill you is actually someone you know. As Baeu navigates first love, ancient vampires, werewolves, faith, family, and the occasional catastrophic misunderstanding, he learns that growing up isn't about having all the answers. It's about learning when to fight, when to trust, when to forgive... and when to keep the shotgun loaded.

Alexandra van der Wansem - fashion icon 👠, certified menace 🚨, and the queen bee 🐝 of Macca-Villacrosse - just got absolutely obliterated by a car 🚗💥 (don't worry, the car's fine 💅). Now she's in a coma 🛌 looking expensive and unconscious 😴✨. But plot twist: her soul floats up to ✨Cloud Drama 9000✨, where she meets an ✨angel✨ with a clipboard and zero chill 😒📋. He pulls up her karma receipts 📈📉 and-yikes-homegirl's been AWFUL 😬 (like... "stole candy from a child and then body-shamed the mom" kind of awful). Her punishment? Reincarnation. As. A. Stray. Chihuahua. 🐶🧼🗑️ RIP the glam life. To return to her human body, Alexandra must complete good deeds ✅🤲 as a yappy, fluffy, attitude-packed rat dog 🐾. But then-plot twist #2-a hot, emotionally available, probably-sad-but-in-a-sexy-way man 🧔🔥 finds her and takes her home 🏡. Now Alexandra, trapped in a tiny dog body 🐕, catches feels 😩💘 and is 100% ready to risk it all to smash 💥. The man, obviously, is CLUELESS 😵‍💫. Will she earn enough karma to wake up? Or will she stay trapped in a dog's body... hopelessly in love and painfully horny? 😭💔🐕

''Didn't she murder 3 guys bare-handed?!!'' ''I heard she quit the national team!'' ''Why on earth is she here?'' For years, Brighton Vale Uni's elite foreign exchange program had gathered the brightest prodigies from around the world - students destined to become CEOs, diplomats, researchers, politicians, artists and athletes. No way that list would include the notorious Amy Roy, right??? The media frenzy around Amy wasn't because she was pretty or smart - it was because she refused to cower in the face of danger, instead facing it head-on with a kind of strength that was admirable. What no one expected, however, was that she was indeed pretty and smart, and determined to not be defined by her circumstance, had somehow managed to get into a prestigious program on the opposite end of the world. "Can you tell me where the library is?" "OMG! You're THE Amy Roy!" "Uh yeah?" "No way, really?" "Dude, can you just tell me where it is?" Safe to say her arrival at BVU caused quite a ruckus. They expected someone cold, intimidating, and quiet. Definitely not a barely 5-foot-tall, utterly chaotic yet enigmatic individual with determined eyes that promised trouble and mischief. No one knows why she's here or what she'll do next, but one thing is for sure - it's going to be a hell of a year at BVU, especially for the student council president, Lukas Beckett. Trigger Warning: This story contains explicit references including but not limited to traumatic events, sexual assault, grief, mild violence, strong language, and implications of sexual content (not explicit). It also includes lgbtqia+ characters (not the main characters but are crucial to the story) and certain mature themes and emotional distress. Please read with discretion.

School days Teenage Love School days + teenage + love = Crazyness out of control No matter what this combination can turn your world upside down. Our parents says focus on your studies you can fall in love when you're settled in life. But teenage is an age of rebellion. A story of two teenagers shot by cupid. *** After passing 10th grade with 95% of marks, Krutika Purohit wanted to mix well in her new school like the element Carbon. Well her words not mine. Her shy and introverted nature never helped her. For her extroverts were like carbon who can make bond with anyone and introverts were like noble gasses happy in their own. But when she joins her new school she experienced a rollercoaster ride of emotions. And the one sole reason for that was none than the notorious yet the topper in short Mr perfect Laksh Agnihotri *** Laksh Agnihotri AKA Lucky, the defination of perfection he is. Maths is his what do you say first love. He can survive without food but without Maths he is better not alive. After puberty his looks just represented a greek god and he didn't mind having girls around him. What does he need? He is the topper, good looking, smart and the notorious, kind of popular guy. And 99% of girls swoon over the studious guys with specs and messy hair or the good looking guy with the notorious bad boy attitude. And what if you're getting everything in one guy? That is actually a lottery. *** Let's see what happens when Krutika joins her new school and Laksh starts taking a special interest in her. And well Krutika seems to make a new enemy who is none other than Laksh's ex girlfriend whom he dated for 1 week who is his good friend. Well everyone says so that they are 'good friends' and even they talk to eachother quite frequently but who knows what is actually going on? Stay tuned to accompany Krutika in her journey of learning something out of syllabus

A/n : Previously known as "bed full of love, head full of bluff." She didn't realized who I was until I say "Sierra I assume? You know I was gonna say no to this proposal but after seeing my parent's impeccable choice I'm afraid I'll have to agree" it took a moment for her to sink that in and once it did she was horrified. "Uh..za..zain? N..no..y..you wouldn't da..dare" she stuttered whispering. I stalked closer to her like a predator to its prey, she widened her eyes and took a step back I kept on moving until her back hit the wall and she was pinned Against it, I was towering over her. I dipped my head down whispering in her ear my lips touching her earlobe "tsk, tsk, tsk this is gonna be fun, watch me" I lightly pecked her cheek and pulled away to look at her. "W..why are you doing this? Whatever happened it was a year ago, you don't have to ruin both of our lives" she said whispering. "Ohh you see, I was going to say no even if my parents threatened me to disown me but they said that you're the best suitable person for me, so here I am to look at that person and I must say the best indeed" I said sarcastically. Turning around to leave I opened the door I looked back to her and said. "Payback's bitch, darling" and left the room. Sierra khan is 21 years old. She's weird, She's carefree, She's fierce. One day she got to know that her fate was decided. An arrange marriage. It was fated, it was bound to happen. Little did she know that her soon to be husband was someone she Had an unpleasant 'accident' with. Zain khan a 26 years old handsome arrogant man. He is one of the richest people in New York. Girls throw themselves at him just by his single glance. When he met seirra he knew that she's not like other girls who'd kiss the ground he walks on that's what captured his interest. And then they've an arrange marriage, yeah crazy right? Read to know more. Join in their journey of life, love and happiness.

Money can get you a lot of things; it’s even been known to work miracles. Seth Asley has witnessed this on many occasions. For the first time ever, it isn’t enough. Seth’s father has informed him that there is no way he’ll get into college with his grades, his pitiful resume, his unappealing attitude. In an attempt to redeem his chances, his father is forcing him to spend his whole summer volunteering at the local hospital with sick children. It may as well be a prison sentence. But Seth doesn’t know that this is going to be the summer that changes his life. He doesn’t know that a group of seven year olds are going to become his best friends. And he definitely doesn’t know that he’s going to meet a beautiful girl with a dark secret that will threaten his whole world. In the end, the only thing Seth really knows is that he’s Fallen. Cover Designed by ScrewedMind Note: This is a very old work and the writing's not my best, but I did proofread so there shouldn't be too many grammatical errors. Hopefully you all enjoy it anyway!

Daisy Jones had everything you could imagine, a perfect life, shoes, clothes, boyfriends. But no one's perfect? Right? Everyone has their flaws, and she had them too. Ian James was a bad-boy, classiqué type. He was filthy rich, owning everything. What if they find out about each other's flaws? What if they decide to not keep them a secret? Read on to find out! :)