darling on fire • the darkest minds

I never quite understood death, not even when over half of my class died from IAAN, and most adults began to hold us at arms length. But when my brother died, death had become a constant companion.

I remember when my parents found him too. I had been woken up first because my room was at the beginning of the hall. I had already gotten out of bed when I heard their loud weeping. My parents said I didn't have to go to school that day, but I wish I had gone, then maybe I wouldn't have been subjected to their grief and anger. That night as my parents tucked me into bed and my mother gave me an extra long hug, my father only had one thing to say, "It should have been you."