the life I lived
- Reads 11
- Votes 3
- Parts 3
Ongoing5m
Last published Sat, Mar 4, 2017
Have you ever wondered what it's like to have to dismiss your developing mental issues .? Just to make sure your father doesn't find out about his abusive , yet bipolar wife.
Well I don't have to wonder because for me it's a reality . I sometimes find myself crying and refusing to eat for days because of
her . I don't blame my dad for choosing her over me . I mean if I were him I would chose her too.
What happens when she pushes me too far ? When I finally reach my breaking point I mean I'm only human am I not .
I sometimes wonder if he remembers that night that one faithful night I lost it all.I lost it all and my own father hadn't noticed the sudden change in my attitude. How I had stopped being that happy little girl , his little girl .
I'm no longer daddy's little girl
Does he even know who I am any more
I mean I've lived with the man since I was 7 years old
But he didn't raise me he had left that part of my life to my grandmother but what happens when she
dies and I have to go and live with dad and her ...
I live in a house that's not a home
it often gets cold here but I don't mind
I read to forget about the pain
it's as if the lains being numbed down.
What happens when a certain boy worms his way into my heart. He discovers things about me that I don't even know . This boy is the guy that will most likely be the light at the end of the tunnel
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ddepression
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I didn't ask to be born into this world, none of us did but we make the best of it. I'm a twenty-five year old single man. Why you may ask? Because I've seen what love can do to a person. It can destroy them. My parent's are amazing but I can still remember the time's my father threatened to kill my mother, left us due to his mental illness. Besides who needs one main women when I can have a different one under me every night, money to blow and fast cars. I'm just enjoying my time until I take my Papes place at the throne. Most nights are spent living it up with my cousins who are my only friends. However there is the one girl that has caught my eye and I don't know why. I first spotted her at a random coffee house I stepped into. Usually I'm very talkative especially when I'm trying to snag a chic but I couldn't utter a word to her. I barely managed to place my order. Now, I find myself going out of my way to stop by that coffee shop everyday. It doesn't matter that it's out of my way. The only thing that matters is that I see her. I knew I could take her if I really wanted to but I can't make myself to do it. She sees me enter and shoots me that amazing smile and prepares my order without even asking what I want, she knows. She'll offer a greeting but all I can do is nod my head. She makes me lose my word's. Deep in my mind I wonder if she could be the one that could change my mind on love and that scares me. For now I'm satisfied at seeing her for the few minutes it takes to get my coffee. Besides I'm a killer, a future mob king and she's this delicate flower that wouldn't understand my world. It's best to cut my loses and move on. If only I knew her name..
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