No Really, I understand
- LECTURES 16
- Votes 1
- Chapitres 1
En cours d'écriture5m
Dernière publication mar., mars 7, 2017
I wouldn't stay with me either if I had the choice.
This is a brain dump because I have no one else to tell, nowhere else to put it, and no other way of expressing it.
Tous Droits Réservés
Rejoignez la plus grande communauté de conteursObtiens des recommandations personnalisées d'histoires, enregistre tes préférées dans ta bibliothèque, commente et vote pour développer ta communauté.
Vous aimerez aussi
The Words I couldn't Say
This is a place for me to put all the things I wish I said but I just couldn't. These are a way for me to "say" these things without actually saying them to the person I want to. I probably won't ever go back or read any of these because it's like revisiting a bad memory so don't expect much in terms of editing. Also I wouldn't consider this poetry but it is laid out that way. WARNING Talk of depression, suicide, anxiety, and self harm. Don't read if you don't like things like that and may get triggered. I don't mean to cause anyone problems of any sort, but these are the things I feel and can't help. Please keep negativity away as this is a sensitive subject for a lot of people. Thank you. Highest rankings: 99 in sadpoems Highest rankings: 118 in iwannadieTerminé
Someone New ✓
"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Who I am doesn't matter. How I got here doesn't matter. What matters now is I'm getting help, right? That's what they tell me here. They tell me that the road to recovery feels like a terrible butt fuck, but the fact that you're on the path to begin with, is all that matters. So as I sit in this circle of fuck ups, I realize just how different I am from them. I didn't attempt suicide because my mother was a crack addict who didn't want me. My father wasn't abusive. I didn't have a sibling die in a car accident. I was never really bullied either. I attempted suicide because, for the first time in years, I thought I had found something that could make me feel again... and after not feeling much at all for far too long, perhaps I went a bit overboardTerminé
Prisoners of the Facilities
Must break free.. can't do this anymore.. this torture must stop.. help me.. please.. But no one came.. no ever came to help me.. It's time I learn to help myself..Terminé
Life is Liz (LiL, #1)
"Really perfection is only just impossibility." ~~~~ Sometimes I'm happy to be alone. Glad even that I'm able to enjoy me-time in peace. Other times I feel so lonely that I can't breathe without enduring the empty pain in my heart, yearning for another to embrace me, to inhale the scent of his cologne, and for it to lull me into the comfort of tranquility. I yearn for the reassuring warmth of his hug provided by his body heat. I yearn to find he who helps me up when I get beaten down, who fights my demons with me, who pushes me into situations that I fear. Someone who understands, who is always there, who makes me happy again. He who soothes me through his presence only, who laughs with me and at my lame jokes. I long to find the one that can bring me immense joy and I him. He is the person that I doubt I'm able to find. Trigger Warning! 24. 05. 2018 - #4 in #anxietydisorder 30. 05. 2018 - #25 in freementalillness 20. 08. 2020 - #1 in #JugendliteraturTerminé
Starving For Help
"I smile everyday. I live my life like nothing is wrong with me. No one would ever guess that I'm screaming inside or that I've secretly been hiding this huge part of my life. No one would ever know that I cry myself to sleep at night or that deep down I'm starving for help." Welcome to Anorexia. Your hostess is Ana. She'll take over from here. Suffering alone inside of your mind from a terrifying mental disorder, is something that even those who battle such a thing every day, cannot fully understand. It's like being alone 24/7 yet it's never quiet inside of your head. You can't stop the voices. You can't control your emotions. As it gets worse, you lose control of your body all together. You become prey to your disease and You can't fight back. That is what it's like for someone who has spent years of their life suffering in silence from an eating disorder. Fighting a monster that you have no chance of beating. It's almost impossible to describe the type of torture that consumes your mind. Hell. It's equivalent to pure hell.Terminé
Metamorphasize
This is a collection of poems written as a way to control a person's feelings; originally they were never intended to be seen by human eyes. This is written from the point of view of someone who struggles with emotional turmoil but feels they cannot tell others about it because their afraid it might drag them into the same torture they feel everyday. Depression is a serious thing that plagues our world and this is one of many ways it can affect a person. Too many people act like this doesn't exist or its a style but its not its a serious issue people have become desensitized to. When this book was first published it climbed its way to #1 in depression, to my dismay I took it down hoping to find a publisher that would be willing to work with me (of course no progress has been made) ALL poems in this book have a trigger warning but if there is *** in the title than its a suggestion and an extra precaution to not read it if you are at risk of becoming triggered. TRIGGER WARNING!!!! FOR ANYONE WHO DEALS WITH DEPRESION OR HAS DEALT WITH IT!!! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!! There is cursing in some parts of this!!!! IF AT ANY POINT YOU FEEL TRIGGERED OR NEED HELP CONTACT THE CRISIS HOTLINE AT 741741Terminé
Cold Water
[BWWM] I was only twelve years old when the world turned cold. The day my mom died in that car accident, I felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over my heart. My dad, who had always been my hero, suddenly became a stranger, filled with rage and blame. He couldn't see that I was hurting, too; he only saw me as a reminder of his loss. The accusations cut deep. He said it was my fault for being there, for not doing something to save her. For being the reason she was in the car in the first place. In the years that followed, things only got worse. The abuse started gradually-a harsh word here, a shove there-but it escalated, leaving scars that I carried long after the physical pain faded. I was drowning in my own despair, struggling to keep my head above water while my father's anger raged like a storm around me. I only had a break from his anger when I started living with Aunt Dina-my mom's older sister. Well, that was because she found me nearly dead on my bed after I took a dozen pills. I was tired of living. I had hit rock bottom. The harsh whispers that followed me around and the stares at school. I pretended not to notice, like it didn't bother me. But it did. I was alone. Then came Athalia, a ray of sunshine cutting through my darkness. With her, I felt something I hadn't felt in years-happiness. She became my light through the darkness and my lifeline. ••••••••••• ● Warnings ⚠️ ~ Mention of suicide ~ Anxiety attacks ~ Rape attempt ~ Mention of self-harm ~ DepressionTerminé
You Were My Because
For every question WHY You were my BECAUSE Anxiety. Depression. Panic Attacks. A small touch of Haphephobia. After years of abuse and sadness, Charlotte finally puts her past behind her and starts over. She finds a new job, a new group of friends, and Axel; life can't get any better. She can finally breathe. She starts to experience happiness and love, but her past keeps coming back to haunt her, showing up at the worst moments and taking her happiness away. She's thrown back into it face first; the drugs, the gangs, the ex that she promised wouldn't lay a hand on her again... Her new life mixes with her old and her secrets are revealed, promises are broken, and everything becomes too much. ------- "I can't just shut it off." I speak softly, wanting Axel to understand that this is who I am. This is the real Charlotte. "I know. You just...you don't have to be alone anymore, Char." My eyes focus on our entwined fingers as my heart beats wildly in my chest, his words repeating in my head. I stare, feeling the weight of his words sink in slowly. Being alone is all I've ever known. "Let me prove it to you." His words sound like a promise, and I gulp, my eyes finally finding his. I find myself wanting to believe him. Wanting to trust him. So I do. "Okay." ------- #2 in Anxious - 1.2025 #1 in Sober - 2.2026
Something Mending -- VOL 1
Of Breaking hearts, young love, betrayal and pain. Of Mending hearts, familiar pain, unexpected hurt and aftermath. Of Healing hearts, underated heartache, pain and acceptance. Of Love, Love that is as deep sea. Pain, that knows no bounds. Strength, that exist within time, but lasts forever. Of Sadness, sadness that always returns, Of Trauma, trauma that runs in deep, and the art of dying, every time. Of Scribbles and rambles, unsaid words and sealed pain. Of Life, Love, Pain, Sadness, Trauma. Of the art of rising like a phoenix, every time. Of Anxiety and Paranoia. Of Anything bad, Of Everything good. This is a story of a girl, it's a continuous one. A story of a sad girl, very lonely, but beautiful, intelligent and strong. She's a self sabotaging narcissistic girl, but also a talented, skilled and brave girl. She is riddled with anxiety and depression, but somehow finds ways to get up each morning, thinking of beautiful things. She has loved and lost, hurt and being hurt. She has not lost herself, but she has not find herself either. This is the life of a girl, laid before you in poems and thoughts. Here is a piece of me, and in here, undoubtedly, you will find pieces of yourself too. I am a mess, but aren't we all? | formerly SOMETHING BROKEN |Terminé
asphyxiate
"Drowning is not the worst part. Lacking the courage to breathe is." No one saw her struggle. No one saw her scars. No one saw her bleeding. No one saw her tears. No one saw her depression. They never realized the deep waters she swam. If only someone would. What if someone did? Completed 11/07-17 ©EscapeYourMiseryTerminé
This is a place for me to put all the things I wish I said but I just couldn't. These are a way for me to "say" these things without actually saying them to the person I want to. I probably won't ever go back or read any of these because it's like revisiting a bad memory so don't expect much in terms of editing. Also I wouldn't consider this poetry but it is laid out that way. WARNING Talk of depression, suicide, anxiety, and self harm. Don't read if you don't like things like that and may get triggered. I don't mean to cause anyone problems of any sort, but these are the things I feel and can't help. Please keep negativity away as this is a sensitive subject for a lot of people. Thank you. Highest rankings: 99 in sadpoems Highest rankings: 118 in iwannadie
Plus d’InfosDirectives de Contenu