Unending Endeavour
- Reads 22
- Votes 1
- Parts 1
Ongoing<5 mins
Last published Fri, Mar 10, 2017
"I had rather have a fool to make me merry, than experience to make me sad..."~Shakespeare~ I had only wished i had listen sooner: I grew up in a foster home and didn't start school until I was 7, but by the age of 12 I was already starting highschool, But life felt like it had no true meaning. I continued my school work, and I graduated by 16, still with no real pull in where life should take me. I figured if I went to college i would find some...guide in my life. But after three years in history, three years in mathematics, two years in architecture, one year in geology, and a year in English with still no meaning, what more could i do. I wasted 10 years of my life, on what? To say I'm more intelligent than others, how intelligent is someone that throws 10 years and 300,000$ on nothingness. At least I thought it was wasted...
That last year of college I met this amazing girl, Autumn was her name. For once in my life i had joy, something to look forward to, meaning. I fell in love, and oh the joy it was. She was perfect, I loved her so much, and she loved me. I proposed, and for some unknown reason she said yes. Every thing was going perfect, almost.
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It's moments like these that make me feel like my soul is entangled with his. It feels like all of the broken pieces of me turned out to be the missing pieces in his puzzle and not at all the worthless trash that I thought they were previously. Every jagged edge dripping with blood that killed the child in me has a home against one of his, which have slowly healed into each other. Huh. Maybe that's just it. Maybe our pasts were meant to be so painful and broken so that when we met, we'd fit each other so perfectly, so snuggly, so completely that nothing would ever be able to break us again. Maybe all of the pain and suffering and loneliness truly did have a purpose after all. Maybe all of it was so that I could become the kind of person that I needed when I was a kid. - - - She is the most selfless, giving, caring, compassionate, intelligent, fearless, ambitious, loyal, kind, stubborn, patient, hardworking, did I mention stubborn-as-hell, woman I have ever met. She treats the world with such kindness even though it has beaten her till she was bloody and bruised more times than you can count. No one in this world deserves happiness and peace more than she does. I just want to grab her demons by the fucking throat and hurt them as bad as they hurt her. I want to hurt Bohr and her dad and Caroline and every person that ever made her feel small or insignificant or made her hate herself. I just want to help her feel happy. She's drowning in front of me and I'm just trying to pull her out of the water.
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