Thoughts?

Thoughts?

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Some stuff I wrote when I've had a bad day or I'm just think about and I write it out. Some have a cuss word so just warning you now before you read if you don't like that stuff. Give me feedback if I should keep going or if you like what I write thanks. We all know no will write to me tho so ??‍♀️??‍♀️ that's cool just enjoy my stuff.
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  • Cold Water
    Cold Water
    [BWWM] I was only twelve years old when the world turned cold. The day my mom died in that car accident, I felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over my heart. My dad, who had always been my hero, suddenly became a stranger, filled with rage and blame. He couldn't see that I was hurting, too; he only saw me as a reminder of his loss. The accusations cut deep. He said it was my fault for being there, for not doing something to save her. For being the reason she was in the car in the first place. In the years that followed, things only got worse. The abuse started gradually-a harsh word here, a shove there-but it escalated, leaving scars that I carried long after the physical pain faded. I was drowning in my own despair, struggling to keep my head above water while my father's anger raged like a storm around me. I only had a break from his anger when I started living with Aunt Dina-my mom's older sister. Well, that was because she found me nearly dead on my bed after I took a dozen pills. I was tired of living. I had hit rock bottom. The harsh whispers that followed me around and the stares at school. I pretended not to notice, like it didn't bother me. But it did. I was alone. Then came Athalia, a ray of sunshine cutting through my darkness. With her, I felt something I hadn't felt in years-happiness. She became my light through the darkness and my lifeline. ••••••••••• ● Warnings ⚠️ ~ Mention of suicide ~ Anxiety attacks ~ Rape attempt ~ Mention of self-harm ~ Depression
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    The Forgotten Tragedy
    The Forgotten Tragedy
    Harsh and raspy; His voice bombed with power as he clenched his fists in rage. The young girl stumbled over her bare feet, her heart about to explode out of her chest. Her breathe was ragged, eyes shut for a split second before being born again and filling her body with a big scoop of that cold morning air. She starred hard at the morning sun as it started to peak its way over the horizon. All of her built up emotions start to find their way to her watery eyes and pour down her cheeks. Smiling as she cried the last thing that girl noticed was the wonderful white snow falling on that not so beautiful Christmas morning. He is a drunk, he cant let go of the pass or control his anger. She just wants to protect her child and live a happy life. She just wanted to help but now she needs someone to help. He just wants to be loved. Why does life never go his way? He is a horrible, rich powerful man and always gets what he wants. He has nothing yet he still tries to help all for what? #Wattys2016
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  • My Internal Junkyard.
    My Internal Junkyard.
    Highest ranking #4 in poetry (17/09/16) Hi, This is a 365 day self evaluation project. I think I am degradation because of the junk filled in my head. So I let it out here in form of poetry. My grey matter is weird, troubled yet pretty cool. Read if you like. Thank you. ----------------------------------------------------------- PS : i was 16 -17 (2016-2017) when i wrote and published these be kind -2025 edit
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    Grey's Tale ✅
    Grey's Tale ✅
    WARNING : CONTAINS SWEARING, SEXUAL THEMES AND SUICIDE He grabbed the nearest object, a vase, and threw it against the wall He was angry with himself and the world Why couldn't he just be normal? Why won't his demons leave? Why do people have to lie? Why do we have to die? Finn slid down the wall as his mind did flips. His body was numb "Jackson!" He was no longer in Finn's world "Alexia please" you cast her out "Mark" you made him leave "Dad where are you?" He was never there No one was here, Grey cast them all out. Finn was left to suffer his childhood all over again and it was Grey's fault His hand pressed against the broken glass. He hissed in pain, his eyes glued to his wound ~Do it~ ~No one would miss you~ ~It would make your pain go away~ ~Nothingness is better than feeling~ Grey picked up a piece of glass, it pressed into his already injured hand. He had done this before but he was always saved, no one was here this time, he made them leave. Death was everyone's fate so why not speed up his own, tears streamed down his face as he imagined Alexia, she cares ~Don't lie to yourself, if she really cared she'd still be here with you~ "You're right" ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Highest Ranks #8 on Homophobia #11 on Billionaire #34 on Romance Cover Made By: @SpratleyMac
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  • Poems
    Poems
    Full of poems that I've written, am writing, will write. Maybe mostly about life and others are deep stuff and more... Some are happy and some are sad/dark. Some poem(s) I wrote about or related to a book/movie.etc. Others I wrote as a story in poem form. *checked my old poems recently and GORE, HORROR, BLOOD ALERT for some of the poems near the beginning!! SO maybe best to read my poems from bottom to the top if you mind the stuff^^^ *I think the more recent poems are quite different from the older ones. Some poems you can interpret as you wish :) Hope you'll like the poems!!! Leave a vote if you want or comment your favourite lines or any thoughts about the poem :D Earliest poems date back from March 2018 P.S. sorry for misspelled words and lack of punctuations in the first few poems. And, if you think the poem is about you, do not ask me. Because I will neither admit nor deny ;) Achievements in my eyes(DD/MM/YYYY) 1.01K reads~15/07/2020 1.34K reads & 78 votes~17/052021 1.47K reads & 108 votes~09/072021 1.68K reads~03/032022 2.01K reads~15/112022 2.33K reads~25/07/2023 4.04K reads ~18/09/2025 (Thank you readers!)
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    A Little Bit Of Joy | ✔
    A Little Bit Of Joy | ✔
    [Featured by wattpad romance, teen fiction, young adult and psychologicalnovel] Joy Jones was a seventeen-year-old kind and optimistic girl working in her grandpa's flower shop, but she had a secret. She was suffering from acute lymphoblastic leukaemia and wanted nothing, but to die peacefully. That was until Logan Kellerman, a young man with suicidal tendencies came storming into her life and stole roses from her grandpa's flower shop. Instead of running away with what he came for, he found himself falling deeper and deeper into her as she made his heart skip in delight, for she was, in her own words, a little bit of Joy. * * * from some of my readers of this book, thanks❤- ❝I LOVE YOUR STORY OKAY. THIS STORY AND YOUR WRITING- IT GIVES ME HOPE YOU KNOW.❞ - aimawrites ❝This is so different than so many stereotypical stories on here and i'm so glad i read it.❞ -lepus_leporis ❝They're both so poetic and beautiful and perfect for each other. GAHHhh I love them.❞ - alycecaswell ❝The way she vividly describes the world makes me so happy. Heat keeps rushing to my cheeks in pure euphoric joy. This book is making me so grateful for everything around me and I never want it to end.❞ - nylammeeyn [highest rank: 7 in sad] [cover by soulanatomy]
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  • Dark Poetry
    Dark Poetry
    just some poems I wrote when I'm feeling low or in a dark place, my poems help me cope with my depression and other mental problems it also helps me from going all the way down in my dark times. these poems are dark, depressing and some have suicide in them, if you don't like poems like that I wouldn't recommend reading this. If you do like poems like that then please read on. Also if you read these please do not comment that you feel sorry for me, I did not put my poems up for pity or sympathy. nor send me messages wanted to know all about my demons because you see me as entertainment to you now. Thank you. -Skellington_girl95 Also if you enjoyed read these poems, I suggest you read book 2 of this one.
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    If Not Now , Then When?
    If Not Now , Then When?
    [featured 4x] A palate of poems. {Some simple words mean really deep. We use them without knowing their true worth... I portray such simple words in my poems.} {You will find long poems, In simple words. Some short ones, And a few deep thoughts} {If not now Then when? Words are crops, we plough. Memories are sand, ashen} ●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○ This collection of poems is a souvenir of my journey through the range of emotions I feel every day and of how I view the world around me . {Sometimes I lack zeal, Sometimes I don't. Sometimes I don't feel, Anything and everything feels unknown.} ●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○ 🥇1st place in best book cover in starry sky mini awards... 💫 cover credits - @bl_AcK_zE_rO ●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○ If you are reading this book somewhere else other than WATTPAD. it's not safe!! Your device is under threat. Please report that site!!! ●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○ Most impressive ranking #3 in poetry out of 261K on( 1st - 3rd August 2021) #1 in poeticjustice out of 1.4K #1 in poesia out of 12.3K #1 in poembook out of 10.7 K #1 in thoughtsandfeelings out of 9.97 K #1 in poetrycollection out of 22.4K #8 in poem out of 156K on 1st to 6 th July #1 in thoughts out of 73.6 K
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  • The Words I couldn't Say
    The Words I couldn't Say
    This is a place for me to put all the things I wish I said but I just couldn't. These are a way for me to "say" these things without actually saying them to the person I want to. I probably won't ever go back or read any of these because it's like revisiting a bad memory so don't expect much in terms of editing. Also I wouldn't consider this poetry but it is laid out that way. WARNING Talk of depression, suicide, anxiety, and self harm. Don't read if you don't like things like that and may get triggered. I don't mean to cause anyone problems of any sort, but these are the things I feel and can't help. Please keep negativity away as this is a sensitive subject for a lot of people. Thank you. Highest rankings: 99 in sadpoems Highest rankings: 118 in iwannadie
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    Poems (collection 1.0)
    Poems (collection 1.0)
    please don't read this (i laugh here, but i'm not joking). this is a relic. consider this the museum of my progression in writing. you can find the better (marginally) stuff from this one in "Poems (collection 2.0)". Thoughtful, often sad, and angry poems. It's an outlet. A way to be heard. Not genius; only jumbled messes of the multitude of my thoughts fighting their way out of my brain. There's so much I want to say, but not enough time to say it. Here are my attempts.
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  • Cold Water
  • The Forgotten Tragedy
  • My Internal Junkyard.
  • Grey's Tale ✅
  • Poems
  • A Little Bit Of Joy | ✔
  • Dark Poetry
  • If Not Now , Then When?
  • The Words I couldn't Say
  • Poems (collection 1.0)

Cold Water

[BWWM] I was only twelve years old when the world turned cold. The day my mom died in that car accident, I felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over my heart. My dad, who had always been my hero, suddenly became a stranger, filled with rage and blame. He couldn't see that I was hurting, too; he only saw me as a reminder of his loss. The accusations cut deep. He said it was my fault for being there, for not doing something to save her. For being the reason she was in the car in the first place. In the years that followed, things only got worse. The abuse started gradually-a harsh word here, a shove there-but it escalated, leaving scars that I carried long after the physical pain faded. I was drowning in my own despair, struggling to keep my head above water while my father's anger raged like a storm around me. I only had a break from his anger when I started living with Aunt Dina-my mom's older sister. Well, that was because she found me nearly dead on my bed after I took a dozen pills. I was tired of living. I had hit rock bottom. The harsh whispers that followed me around and the stares at school. I pretended not to notice, like it didn't bother me. But it did. I was alone. Then came Athalia, a ray of sunshine cutting through my darkness. With her, I felt something I hadn't felt in years-happiness. She became my light through the darkness and my lifeline. ••••••••••• ● Warnings ⚠️ ~ Mention of suicide ~ Anxiety attacks ~ Rape attempt ~ Mention of self-harm ~ Depression

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