How to Love You - Ida - Wattpad

How to Love You

Reads 215
Votes 21
Parts 7
Time 1h 58m

Reads 215
Votes 21
Parts 7
Time 1h 58m

Mature

badboy friendship love sad selfharm suicidal suicide

"What is this?" I asked, carefully stroking the fading scars on his upper arm. Thin pale lines. Horrifying. I felt the urge to cry my heart out in his arms. This is the last straw. Of all the terrible things in my life, this is what finally put me over the edge.

"What are you doing to yourself?" I sobbed as I pulled up the sleeve of his left arm too, revealing new identical scars. Who am I to cry? My burdens are nothing compared to his, and yet, I am being a crybaby at his feet.

"Why have you never told me about this?" I never ran out of questions, but he was out of answers. He didn't say anything. He only watched me as I scrutinized every inch of his skin, searching for what I feared the most.

I couldn't help the crying. I was attached to him, every pain in his life, affected me too. He is the reason for my happiness, yet the reason for my deepest sadness. I looked at them over and over again. The scars. Carved in his skin. In his soul. I never would have guessed that the always so cheerful, laughing guy I met at school, with his adorable dimples, felt so much pain on the inside.

"It helps me. It makes me feel better" he muttered after a while. I looked up, meeting his tired gaze. Bloodshot heavy eyes stared into mine. The eyes of someone who hadn't slept for days. My poor baby.. How can you be my greatest burden and my biggest source of happiness at the same time? I ask myself that question everyday.All Rights Reserved

badboy friendship love sad selfharm suicidal suicide

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Not me. (2023) by MineOnlyFriend2

so, I've been struggling for a long time now, and I never told anyone about it. I've never opened up. but I met someone who understands how I feel, and I'm beginning to feel again. I don't know how to do it, but I finally feel I can fight. I've been so exhausted. I'm not better, I'm not sure if i ever will be, but I'm not numb, not entirely. I can't say how I'm feeling, or what i am going to write, but if you want it, it's here. This is for you. For everyone who was made to be the villain by those meant to be by their sides. For everyone with a sensitive heart made to grow strong much too quickly. For everyone who struggles to get out of bed in the morning. For everyone who never could find the words to say why. For everyone who struggles to feel and for everyone who feels too much. For everyone who had to pick themselves back up. For everyone who had to parent themselves. For everyone fighting an invisible battle. For everyone who has been underestimated. For everyone who has to flee to other worlds to cope. For everyone who found other means to silence their voices. For everyone who was silenced. For everyone who was over powered. For everyone who was made to be less. For everyone who had to watch someone else suffer and stay silent. For everyone asking themselves, why? Why would you do this? What did I do? Why is this happening to me? It was never your fault.

Cold Water by adaline_meadows

[BWWM] I was only twelve years old when the world turned cold. The day my mom died in that car accident, I felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over my heart. My dad, who had always been my hero, suddenly became a stranger, filled with rage and blame. He couldn't see that I was hurting, too; he only saw me as a reminder of his loss. The accusations cut deep. He said it was my fault for being there, for not doing something to save her. For being the reason she was in the car in the first place. In the years that followed, things only got worse. The abuse started gradually-a harsh word here, a shove there-but it escalated, leaving scars that I carried long after the physical pain faded. I was drowning in my own despair, struggling to keep my head above water while my father's anger raged like a storm around me. I only had a break from his anger when I started living with Aunt Dina-my mom's older sister. Well, that was because she found me nearly dead on my bed after I took a dozen pills. I was tired of living. I had hit rock bottom. The harsh whispers that followed me around and the stares at school. I pretended not to notice, like it didn't bother me. But it did. I was alone. Then came Athalia, a ray of sunshine cutting through my darkness. With her, I felt something I hadn't felt in years-happiness. She became my light through the darkness and my lifeline. ••••••••••• ● Warnings ⚠️ ~ Mention of suicide ~ Anxiety attacks ~ Rape attempt ~ Mention of self-harm ~ Depression

The Citizen Soldier (DNF) by CheetahBoi

!!Trigger warning: suicide, Implied/Referenced Self Harm!! Warnings before sections. . This book is currently discontinued, if I find motivation to finish it it is not in the foreseeable future. . "Trust me." His voice was soft and calming, the way that a good father could be assumed to sound. "This isn't what you want, it never has been and it never will be. Confusion is difficult to work through, but if you just let me help you, I can show you that it can be worked through." He rolled up his sleeve, showing several white streaks across his skin. The other was shocked. "N-no, I'm not good for anything, I'm nothing there's nothing for me." He shook his head many times, holding it in his hands after a bit. "No." "Can I touch you?" The boy who was trying to help this poor soul had approached a few paces. His voice was now quieter, more soft, and still caring. The boy at the bridge took a moment to think, then nodded his approval. The savior gently took the boy's hands delicately in his own and gently pulled the boy back. Well, less of a pull and more of a gentle suggestion. It worked and the boy stumbled down off of the edge. The boy started to cry. How could he be so weak that a boy, the same age as him, who seemed to have the same ideas and hatred toward himself as he, could keep him from stepping off? The other simply gently led him to his vehicle and took out a water bottle out of the backseat. The boy took it and looked at it suspiciously. "It's untampered, look, it's still sealed." Upon seeing this, the boy opened it and took a few sips of water. "Thank you. For the water." The savior smiled. "It's nothing much." He shrugged. "Have a phone? If you want I can put my number in and then you'll always be able to tell someone if you're having a pissy day." Surprisingly enough, the boy agreed. . They would both be around twenty.

The Boy Who Lived Again (boyxboy) (COMPLETED) by Fallen_Angel0416

What if you committed suicide one day. After just one horrible day that set you off. You know, the bullies and the mean classmates who want to help but don't. And your crush refuses to help you one night. What if another woke up months later with no memory? You don't know who you are, nothing seems familiar. All you know is that something draws you to a boy who died months ago right before school ended. A lot of people care that he is dead, they feel responsible. Another boy catches your attention and you can't help but feel something for him. What if he's the answer to your problem but he won't talk about the dead boy? What if he does? Can you win over his trust and figure things out or will meeting him awaken something in you, you may or may not have known? or seen coming...

To Be Broken by lazylazerkitten

What does it mean to be broken? (I wrote this poem myself) ______________________________ Why be sad? When no one knows how bad You feel your Pain makes you sore. Why be mad? When no one can tell How hard you fell How it hurts MORE than a tad. Why be happy? Be like all those sappy People pretending to be What they want you to see. Why be frightened? Senses heightened Screaming, As sick people are beaming. Why be tired? When no one knows How your wired How you grow. Why be honest? When all known is a broken promise When no one believes you Even if what you say is true. Why hurt? When no one feels your pain When no one's ever alert When you never feel sane. Why pretend? When you know in the end No one will be there Because no one cares. Why care? When no one cares enough for you To know what your going through They think your heart is unfair. Why try? When no one sees that you do They just pry Thinking they know more than you. Why speak? When no one will ever hear They'll say you're a freak They don't see a single tear. Why do anything at all? It's not like anyone will see If you fall If you scream. ____________________________________ "Just admit it Winter. After the whole accident....your broken." "No...No that's where your wrong. I'm not broken. Because to be broken, you had to have been whole in the first place."

The Feeling Underneath by ElisiaWrites

"The stars are infinite. And all I've ever wanted was an infinite." ______________ All I knew was pain. Pain was I, and I was pain. We shared each other, mind and body. Me and pain were made for each other like puzzle pieces, and that sickened me. I loved pain, I hated pain. I loved bringing the knife to my wrist, but I hated the ache in my chest, like drowning. There was nothing I sought more than my own self destruction. And here, amongst the stars, skies, and cliffs, I'd find what I sought. I'd make it mine. I'd become infinite. WARNING: this story contains abuse, self harm, and suicide. Do not read if these topics can trigger something within you. Please, know your limits.

My Broken Girl (Bad Boy) by Abileneansongwriter

"I'm not a beautiful, I'm ugly". I said as he holds my hand. "Your beautiful and your broken". He said as he rest his head on my forehead. "They say 'She's beautiful, but broken'. I am broken and I always will be broken". I said as he pressed his soft lips on mine. "Not for long". He said as he holds my chin. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This story had inspired me to write this, so, don't steal my storyline. Warning! There will be violence There will be self harm There will be bad language

Don't Wake Me Up || Septiplier by KennyOnFire

I looked up at Mark, his soft brown eyes stared back in a caring manner. My eyes fell back down to my feet, not wanting to look at Mark in this situation. "Sean," he whispered, trailing his finger along my jaw line to my chin, lifting it up a bit. His hand gently wrapped around my wrist and pulled it up to our faces. "Please, tell me who gave you these. I've asked you a million times, and I need to know. Please." His voice came out soothing and gentle, but it also held a tone of seriousness. My eyelids fluttered as I held back my tears, and I looked over towards the bruise covering my left arm. I couldn't tell him. That would get me killed. My parents wouldn't hesitate to kill me. They've made that clear. ~~~~ Sean McLoughlin had a horrid life. From abusive parents to being bullied in school, he felt like he was alone. But when one day, he accidentally bumps into one of the most well known guy in the whole school, Mark Fischbach, he wasn't expecting his whole life to flip upside down. All respect to the people this story is about. By me writing this, I do not intend any disrespect to them or their actual relationships.

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You Can't Love Me by _sickBANANa

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Slide 1 of 10

Not me. (2023) cover

Cold Water cover

The Citizen Soldier (DNF) cover

The Boy Who Lived Again (boyxboy) (COMPLETED) cover

To Be Broken cover

The Feeling Underneath cover

My Broken Girl (Bad Boy) cover

Don't Wake Me Up || Septiplier cover

It All Started With A Lie cover

You Can't Love Me cover

Not me. (2023)

so, I've been struggling for a long time now, and I never told anyone about it. I've never opened up. but I met someone who understands how I feel, and I'm beginning to feel again. I don't know how to do it, but I finally feel I can fight. I've been so exhausted. I'm not better, I'm not sure if i ever will be, but I'm not numb, not entirely. I can't say how I'm feeling, or what i am going to write, but if you want it, it's here. This is for you. For everyone who was made to be the villain by those meant to be by their sides. For everyone with a sensitive heart made to grow strong much too quickly. For everyone who struggles to get out of bed in the morning. For everyone who never could find the words to say why. For everyone who struggles to feel and for everyone who feels too much. For everyone who had to pick themselves back up. For everyone who had to parent themselves. For everyone fighting an invisible battle. For everyone who has been underestimated. For everyone who has to flee to other worlds to cope. For everyone who found other means to silence their voices. For everyone who was silenced. For everyone who was over powered. For everyone who was made to be less. For everyone who had to watch someone else suffer and stay silent. For everyone asking themselves, why? Why would you do this? What did I do? Why is this happening to me? It was never your fault.