Insane

I've been sitting here on my bed, rocking back and forth contemplating the things that have went wrong in the past few months I've been here. I don't know how long, could be hours. Im also thinking about the sound of the bullet ringing in my ears, and the mysterious boy with the black hoodie. All I can do is stare at the wall. No tears are coming out, I got rid of those a few minutes ago. The only thing I feel is emptiness. A deep, everlasting black hole deep within me, because I know I could have saved her. I know I could have been the one to save her precious life, but that's too late to think about now. The only thing I can think of is the sound of the bullet. And the look she gave me all the while her life was slowly fading from her body. And how it is all my fault. My name is Chasten, and I killed my best friend. Hypothetically.