fallen
- Reads 37
- Votes 2
- Parts 1
Ongoing11m
Last published Fri, Jun 2, 2017
(possible trigger warning)
I tell myself it's all okay, when really I am blinded by my own lies for my own sake. I can't lay down to cry again, I would look weak, miserable. I wonder what my mother would say, if she were here to kiss my sins. To look down at the water that I've never touched, and smile glumly at the world I've created. Nobody thought that I had this mind, not even did I for most of the time. I am alone, but that is my choice. I'm a horrible person, I will never rejoice. My skin burns every time I walk, I know that I'm not worthy, I am just a vain attempt of happiness, when will everyone see what I see. When will everyone care about each other.
Only sadness withers beneath me. I can hear it crawling up besides me. Nobody is here to protect me, as I am the silence that is not worthy.
Watch how this young girl grows up. From a tiny spark of light in her own mind into a giant star, growing inside a flower that weeps.
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#91
itscomplicated
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[BWWM] I was only twelve years old when the world turned cold. The day my mom died in that car accident, I felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over my heart. My dad, who had always been my hero, suddenly became a stranger, filled with rage and blame. He couldn't see that I was hurting, too; he only saw me as a reminder of his loss. The accusations cut deep. He said it was my fault for being there, for not doing something to save her. For being the reason she was in the car in the first place. In the years that followed, things only got worse. The abuse started gradually-a harsh word here, a shove there-but it escalated, leaving scars that I carried long after the physical pain faded. I was drowning in my own despair, struggling to keep my head above water while my father's anger raged like a storm around me. I only had a break from his anger when I started living with Aunt Dina-my mom's older sister. Well, that was because she found me nearly dead on my bed after I took a dozen pills. I was tired of living. I had hit rock bottom. The harsh whispers that followed me around and the stares at school. I pretended not to notice, like it didn't bother me. But it did. I was alone. Then came Athalia, a ray of sunshine cutting through my darkness. With her, I felt something I hadn't felt in years-happiness. She became my light through the darkness and my lifeline. ••••••••••• ● Warnings ⚠️ ~ Mention of suicide ~ Anxiety attacks ~ Rape attempt ~ Mention of self-harm ~ Depression
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