Aus dem Leben einer Versagerin - No Name - Wattpad

Aus dem Leben einer Versagerin

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Reads 14
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Parts 3
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Reads 14
Votes 0
Parts 3
Time 6m

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depression fucklife hateeveryone tagebuch trauer ugly

Um endlich meine Gefühle hinzuschreiben und meinem Leben einen Sinn zu geben werde ich dieses Buch schreiben vielleicht bin ich am Ende dieses Buches nicht mehr am Leben..meiner Existenz werde ich noch ein Jahr Zeit geben..bzw. bis nächstes Jahr nach den Sommerferien (stand Samstag ,10. Juni. 2017)..Bisher habe ich meinen Tod immer rausgezögert, ich habe es schon 4 mal versucht und über 100 mal daran gedacht...allerdings bin ich erst 13 Jahre alt, natürlich kann man jetzt sagen, dass es eine Phase ist der jeder Jugendliche einmal durchmacht, ich sage jedoch das ist es nicht. Seit über einem Jahr mach ich das schon durch und wenn es nicht besser wird, werde ich wohl nicht mehr lange Leben, das einzige was mich noch aufhält ist "das Buch", denn ich habe mir zum Ziel gesetzt es bis zum ende meines Lebens zu schreiben und es muss veröffentlicht werden, mit diesem Buch will ich Personen, die das selbe durchmachen wie ich aufhalten den selben Fehler zu begehen...darin eingeschlossen ist: ritzen, Selbstmordversuche, Selbstmordgedanken, usw..
Ich denke das hier wird sowas wie mein TagebuchAll Rights Reserved

depression fucklife hateeveryone tagebuch trauer ugly

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It Wasn't Love ✔️ by depressedn0nce

"Fuck." He whispers into my neck, sending a thrill of excitement through my body. His lips still smothered kisses over my neck and his hands roamed my body, starting at my chest, going down to my stomach. Caressing my soft skin, his thumb trailed circles on my groin before slightly slipping into the waistband of my jeans. My breath catches in my throat as I pull at the hoodie that covered his chiselled body. Understanding, Jacob pulls it off in one swift movement before attaching his lips back on my neck. Sucking and biting it before flicking his tongue over the sore spot. A quiet moan leaves my mouth and I clasp my hand over it, denying any noise to escape. "You drive me fucking crazy, Aria." ---------------------------- Aria Bailey finds it hard to fit in. Her parents are always busy and never have time for her. She lives alone at her family home and has top grades in all of her classes. But being a 17 year old friendless nerd comes with its disadvantages. The bullying gets worse every single day, driving her to self harm and suicidal thoughts. Aria learns more about popular boy, Jacob Rickson and starts developing feelings for the well known 18 year old. Jacob helps her come out of her shell and learn to be more comfortable and confident. Aria has to make a tough decision by choosing if she would rather be with Jacob and be bullied by her mind for eternity, or to leave and be left alone, exactly how she wants to be. -Strangers to lovers -Right person, wrong time

Night Rider by Hermione_Hofferson

Night Rider - A httyd and Hiccstrid book. -Astrid's pov- 8 years. That's how long it has been. 8 lonely, cold, devastating years of my life that I will never get back. Every night I dream the same dream - every night the same day returns to haunt me over and over. That day dramatically changed my life for the worst. Why did that day happen? Everyone learnt to leave me in peace in the morning. Everyone knew my deepest, darkest secret that changed people's opinions of me forever. Everyone knew my arch enemy, but only 2 people know why he is my arch enemy. My friends still talk to me, just not in the same way as they used to - it's almost as if they are scared of me, or don't want to be associated with me. One day I want this to change. One day I want my life to turn around. One day I will truely be me again. One day I will be happy. One day I will be free. I cannot see that day in the forseeable future, but I know it will come, and I know somehow it is connected to my enemy. *I know that it is an over-used story line but I tried to spice it up a little. Kinda like how you may always eat a Chicken Masala and then you try a Vindaloo - they're both food and both curries but one is different from the other* There are extra chapters at the end containing side-stories of this book. It will make more sense when you read the chapter titled: 'The little boat' near the end of the book, but the actual story is 60 chapters long.

I Fell in Love with a Bad Boy by Beautiful_Tragedy8

CRINGE WARNING! First book I ever wrote on here!! -- "Sometimes the person who you are willing to take a bullet for is the person behind the gun." I stood peering over the cold lifeless body that lay before my eyes. I had always thought of death the enemy, but right now, I blessed it upon the person who is now at peace. Sometimes you don't need to be the smartest, or the fastest, but you do need to be wisest. They say the blood runs deeper than water, and I believe it, because even though the people that we love can turn on us and begin to hate us, they are only human, meaning that soon they will begin to see how short life really is and how it is not to be wasted. People who seem perfect and they look like they have no floors'; they are the people who are suffering, like I was. But I found my savior in the most uncommon place. He was able to look through my mask, he saw the cracks, and tried to fix the broken girl that hid away deep inside the girl who only wanted to be seen as 'fine'. I slowly began to find comfort and safety in him, and I did the same to him. We were two broken people becoming whole. Someone once said when you pass, if you can count your true friends on one hand you are beyond lucky, and I even though I did not like the person that lay before me, I know that he once had true friends, including me. I'm a 17 year old girl who has suffered more than any other, beginning to believe that 'Hope' was just another word the people throw around. Until I fell in love with a badboy. Trailer to the side -------------------> Made By @Laura__1 Cover made by @Beautiful_Tragedy8 Copyright 2014

Nuestro Si? Si. by _ricksrm

Nuestro Sí? Sí. es una historia sobre el amor joven, el autodescubrimiento y los lazos familiares. Algunas historias de amor comienzan con un "sí", otras con incertidumbre, y algunas se escriben entre líneas de conversaciones nocturnas, miradas prolongadas y la silenciosa valentía de dos almas que buscan encontrarse. A través de mensajes llenos de risas, vulnerabilidad y revelaciones sinceras, Rafa de 22 años casi 23, que enfrenta las expectativas sociales y la homofobia internalizada-explora un romance reavivado con Martin, de 30 años recién cumplidos. Entre la paciencia tejida en el destino y una conexión tan profunda que convirtió cada amor pasado en un mero prólogo, su viaje se convierte en más que una historia de amor: es un camino hacia el autodescubrimiento, la fe y la aceptación de su verdadero ser. Porque hay amores que transforman, que desafían la duda y que enseñan que, a veces, lo más valioso es aquello que se construye con el tiempo. ¿Será su "sí" un destino escrito? ¿O se convertirá en un "qué hubiera sido" perdido en los ecos del tiempo y las circunstancias?

Static by hattielynn

{COMPLETED} "now that you've had your fun electrocuting me, would you care to hop in the backseat?" ---------------------------------------------------------- Freak DNA. That's what I like to call it. The fault to my genetic code. More often than not, it's a curse. The static running through my blood gave me a name. A cruel, daunting label of a measly bug. A roach. That's what I am to them, to the government. Roach; the nameless monster with electricity for a sense and lightening as a second nature. It ruined my life, the sparking currents playing tag in my mind, running around and bumping into everything, shaking me loose. The government, actually. They ruined my life. My curse just gave them a reason. You see, the normal population with ordinary DNA, they don't know about the people like me. The roaches of the world. We don't get that kind of recognition at the camps. There, we are only one thing in the military's eyes. We are weapons and we will act like it. Everyone else out there, bathing in the goodness they don't know they've got, they don't know about the roaches their stepping on. As long as their getting closer to the sky, they don't care what they stand on to reach it. They don't know about the sparkling dreamer that's killed 7 people before her 17th birthday. They don't about the ghost of a girl peaking around corners for her entire life because even home wasn't safe. They don't know about the fighter of steel and iron sucking on his bloody lip courtesy of the wars he battles in as nothing but a shadow. They don't know about the masked villain who would do anything to see the army they lead claim the throne They don't know about us. But they will, because we will rise. And when we arrive, we will arrive violently. ___________________________________________ Started: 10.06.15 Finished: 3.17.16

You don't know me by You_Dont_Know_Me9374

⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ Not for the faint of heart, I explore dark parts of my mind and unfurl them for your own enjoyment. All of these stories are true. You don't know me, and you're never going to. This is basically just a shitty diary of my life with very few details as to who I am, Don't want to scare you off. Feel free to read but I don't really care. I'm just a screwed up guy that everyone knows and nobody cares about really. If you can't tell I'll probably swear quite a bit in this so if you don't like that I'm sorry, but this really isn't a good read anyway it's just me complaining about the fact I still exist. Actually no, whilst I did start this to complain about my life, the stories are fluctuating, as I discover I am infact worthy of love, even I don't believe it at all times. I hope you enjoy my rantings. ⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️

𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 | 18+ by A_solitude_girl12

꧁𝗙𝗮𝗺𝗶𝗹𝘆 𝗥𝗶𝘃𝗮𝗹𝗿𝘆 ꧂ ❝𝐀𝐝𝐯𝐚𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐚 & 𝐌𝐢𝐤𝐬𝐡𝐚 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐚❞ I should not feel anything for someone who is my enemy, someone who has caused me so much pain that the very thought of him should fill me with nothing but rage and bitterness. Yet, against all logic, I feel it-I feel the heat rising beneath my skin . The mere idea of his touch sends shivers down my spine, igniting sensations that I desperately want to ignore. This isn't right. I shouldn't crave the presence of someone I despise, but my body betrays me, responding to him in ways that my mind fiercely rejects. He stands so close that his breath fans across my face, warm and intimate, stirring emotions that I refuse to acknowledge. A slight movement is all it would take for our lips to meet, for this unbearable tension to shatter into something far more dangerous. His hands are braced on either side of my head, trapping me, yet he doesn't need to touch me to make me feel trapped. His body hovers just out of reach, yet I can sense him, every inch of him, as if the air itself is an extension of his presence. I shouldn't desire this man. I shouldn't want to close the gap, to feel the press of his body against mine. I should be repulsed, disgusted by how my thoughts betray my hatred. But my body doesn't listen to reason , it yearns for what it shouldn't, driven by instincts I can't control. I despise him-my enemy- My rival-but the line between hatred and desire is blurring, and I'm terrified of which side I might fall on. {𝖠 𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗇𝖽𝖺𝗅𝗈𝗇𝖾 } | | Mature content 18+| |

I do by AB_Monnette

Angel Adams is my name, and having a carefree life is my goal. After graduating from college, I spent the rest of my life jumping from job to job. Making do with living in New York City, from paycheck to paycheck. I don't mind. Money is fake and we live on a floating rock anyways. For the past five years, nothing really stuck with me. The universe changes every millisecond and I go with the flow. Never been in a long-lasting relationship because I get bored. I almost did not graduate college in time because I wanted to do everything and nothing at once. All I want is to move to an island, relax and not work because I don't dream of labor. My parents hate my mentality, they love to call me lazy while my therapist says I am suppressing. I call it going with the flow and having fun. Who would've guessed that the only job that had my interest for the past year and a half, would lead to me marrying a millionaire? The universe works in weird ways but who am I to question, I just go with the flow. ---- Sequel to "Do you love me?" This can be read as a stand-alone but "Do you love me?" is a short story and it sorts of sets the plot. --- *The cover doesn't depict her, you imagine her as dark/light as you want.(she is black tho)

Affection under Devotion by Jamiesbloom

My soul is screaming, each second mocking my whole existence. I should have just died. I am the reason of this affliction. How can I do such a despicable act? How can I be so shameless? How can I do this to the one who protected me like a brother, provided me a family after everyone left me? How can I crush his gratifying golden family? He died because of me. Maya is completely of me. I have shattered the most two beautiful people of my life. One is not there with me while the other will despise me till her last breathe. Everyone hates me now. How will I face Zayan? Will he ever forgive me? Never, he has taken the oath to tear me down till death rattles me. Today was his marriage but his fiance has vanished in the air and I have signed on the death papers as his wife. I know very well he would have never married me, well how can anyone marry the one who is the reason of his brother's death, the reason of his beautiful family shattered into pieces. I am just a witch for the Khan family, who destroy the place, the peoples, the surrounding with her evil eye. I am tired now, I can't take the loathe anymore, I will be more alive if the earth opens up and engulf my pathetic existence like I never existed. I destroyed the lovers, the loved ones and every single flower around me. I am exhausted but I can't share with anyone because no one is there for me. I am very well aware the hell has opened its gate for me from the time Zayan Khan became my husband. He will break me till I am broken completely, but who will tell him that I have already become what he wanted to make me. The last three months, the worst months of my life. I know it very well the day he will find her the first thing he gonna do is kick me out of his life like a unwanted trash and I will not have any option rather than begging on the road. But am I really at fault or am I a prey???

"Diary" of an Autistic by Not_Tireless_158

Hi. I'm Jas, and in case you didn't know, I am autistic. I have Asperger's Syndrome. I'm writing this book just so I can jot some of my thoughts down, and so you can see what it's really like to be autistic, well, for me at least. My best friend made a good comparison just the other day, no two fingerprints are the same, just like no two autistics are the same. I hope you'll enjoy this "diary" and no, I will not put too much about my personal life in here unless you deserve to know about something big happening to me. The other juicy deets are for a real diary. However, there will be sneak peeks to some of the stories I am writing within the confines of this so-called diary. I will also be offering random bits of advice from time to time, and you will get to meet some of my developing characters/ocs that will be featured in my future works. Warning 1: My characters and ocs are still in development, so they might come off as Mary-Sueish, and I don't want my characters to be annoying Mary Sues, so feel free to give feedback and/or constructive critisism on them: it would be a big help if you did because your advice would speed up their development and bring you the stories I am writing much faster than it would working on this on my own. Warning 2: This will have a mature rating because I am a huge potty mouth and I have depression so there'll probably be a lot of swearing and angst. Update: I have level 2 autism, as people do not use the term Asperger's Syndrome anymore, but the term Asperger's Syndrome is what I grew up hearing, so that's what I'm going to use.

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Slide 1 of 10

It Wasn't Love ✔️ cover

Night Rider cover

I Fell in Love with a Bad Boy cover

Nuestro Si? Si. cover

You don't know me cover

𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 | 18+ cover

Affection under Devotion cover

"Diary" of an Autistic cover

It Wasn't Love ✔️

"Fuck." He whispers into my neck, sending a thrill of excitement through my body. His lips still smothered kisses over my neck and his hands roamed my body, starting at my chest, going down to my stomach. Caressing my soft skin, his thumb trailed circles on my groin before slightly slipping into the waistband of my jeans. My breath catches in my throat as I pull at the hoodie that covered his chiselled body. Understanding, Jacob pulls it off in one swift movement before attaching his lips back on my neck. Sucking and biting it before flicking his tongue over the sore spot. A quiet moan leaves my mouth and I clasp my hand over it, denying any noise to escape. "You drive me fucking crazy, Aria." ---------------------------- Aria Bailey finds it hard to fit in. Her parents are always busy and never have time for her. She lives alone at her family home and has top grades in all of her classes. But being a 17 year old friendless nerd comes with its disadvantages. The bullying gets worse every single day, driving her to self harm and suicidal thoughts. Aria learns more about popular boy, Jacob Rickson and starts developing feelings for the well known 18 year old. Jacob helps her come out of her shell and learn to be more comfortable and confident. Aria has to make a tough decision by choosing if she would rather be with Jacob and be bullied by her mind for eternity, or to leave and be left alone, exactly how she wants to be. -Strangers to lovers -Right person, wrong time