This is my truth - Foggymelon - Wattpad

This is my truth

KristinaFigolah

Reads 1,539
Votes 15
Parts 72
Time 1h 33m

Reads 1,539
Votes 15
Parts 72
Time 1h 33m

KristinaFigolah

abuse bastard breakthesilence emotional faith grief growth happiness happyending healing help holdontome honesty littlegirl love overcoming pain personalgrowth religion strange strength survival tragedy trauma yourenotalone

My life has been an intense journey from a little girl who was beaten down and abused into believing that she was worthless, to a woman at 43 years of age who is still desperately searching for who she truly is. I found her though. I did. And she writes like me, from inside of me.  She is me. This girl that I've been in love with since time first existed, is indeed me. The way that she walks. With her hands... and how she talks? The hearts that she's captured, the souls that she has inspired. I'm now trying to be her.  I've never felt that I was good enough to actually be myself!!! I always knew how pure and clear and free I was inside. But people told me otherwise, in a very cruel way. No one ever spared my feelings or thought to speak to me with kindness or love. My parents were very serious and strict people. They believed that there was only 1 way to act and inside I knew that I did NOT fit in the parameters of the behavior expected of me. And every single time I made my Step Daddy sigh or frown it felt like I knife in my heart. I was a let down. Always too loud. Always moving too much. Always too fat and always too ugly.  Always too much. Unless I sat quietly. But I've always been a firecracker and all of that containment really made me want to blow off! All of what was inside of me, swirling and dividing in me. Burying the side of me  that I loved the most! I was a bastard and a blasphemy. Harsh words for a girl of 3. They said them when they baptized me.All Rights Reserved

abuse bastard breakthesilence emotional faith grief growth happiness happyending healing help holdontome honesty littlegirl love overcoming pain personalgrowth religion strange strength survival tragedy trauma yourenotalone

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THAT FIRST BREAK (Broken Redemption Prequel 1) by ArianaClarkAuthor

Choosing her cost me everything I'd ever loved... including her. I had everything a guy could ask for, a loving family, the perfect small-town life, and a promising future I had worked hard for. It should have been enough. She was off-limits, my parent's best friend's daughter, practically my sister. I fought my feelings, pretending our soul-deep connection didn't exist. When she confessed she felt the same, I pushed her away, believing our friendship mattered more than temporary infatuation. That she agreed should have come as a relief, but it left me with this void I didn't know how to fill. It's what drove me to the bonfire that night. Right there, with our friends as witnesses, I claimed her. Told her I loved her and made her promises I shouldn't have made. Hours later, it all came crashing down in a whirlwind of fire and ashes. That one split-second choice to go after a girl that wasn't meant for me cost me everything I loved. I never should have crossed that line or given in. It's why she'll forever be my greatest love and deepest regret. This tragic story is the beginning of our end...

The leaving 11 years on on going stopped up dating for a awhile by CarolOBrien1

The leaving. It was hard, tragic , painful, yet it had to be done, I needed to save my life. I didn't want to start again, this would be the story of finding myself, pulling myself back together, reuniting the happy go lucky youngster I had once been. The shock of leaving took more of a toll on me than I thought it would. I had asked two people to help me move out of the house I had shared with my partner for 8 years, we had been together 23 years in total. The move was done in total secrecy, my partner could never know in advance, it was a very scary time. I had moved various things out of the house and secured a rent on a property nearby. The house I picked was near the School the children went to, and my oldest lad was going to be near his best friend. My Mother told me of the property it was advertised on the web, we both went and had a look, even that was scary, I didn't want to be seen by anyone and became paranoid that I would be caught out. For many months I lived on a new kind of fear, the fear of someone finding out that I planned to leave my abusive partner, though of course no one knew my seemingly happy, funny, generous partner was abusive. Finding the house was one thing, getting the various companies to connect the house and exchanging the information of my current address so they could varify that I was, who I said I was almost drove me mad. The day came to leave, My Mother and a very dear Friend came round as early as possible, we packed as much as we could. This included taking the boys clothes, bedding, toys, stuff from the garden, my stuff. We had 3 cars the packing seem to take all day. By the end we had to get going to be able to unpack, leaving me time to pick up the boys from School and settle them in their new home. I couldn't do it at first,I started to cry then scream, to leave the world I had put so much of my life into, and now in a split second would be leaving was breaking my heart.

A Self-love Story by Kirsten_Sharp

Bliss. Delight. Contentment. Euphoria. Elation. Joy. Glee. Felicity. Jubilation. These are all words synonymous to the word happiness. But what is true happiness? Happiness is that feeling of butterflies fluttering around in your chest, trying to break out. Happiness is that invisible fluid rushing in your veins, making you shiver in the most wonderful way. Happiness is the force that pulls your cheeks up into the widest smile and makes your eyes twinkle. Happiness makes you light-headed and giddy, it is in fact like alcohol. Well then, I am utterly and completely drunk. When you're happy, everything feels amazing. Even small insignificant things like getting up in the morning. The golden hue of sunlight streaming in through the curtains feels like a soft caress from the hand of a lover. The birds seem to chirp sweetly outside, a melody to which the leaves sway as if mesmerised by their music. The curtains tango with the wind beautifully. Every little thing seems perfect. And that's a word I'd use to describe my life. Perfect. To give you a little introduction about me, let me start by explaining the most important aspects of my life. I have a loving family. There's my sarcastic, yet surprisingly sweet brother, my beautiful mother (both in looks and spirit) and my stern, yet humorous father. I have the best best friend, Charlotte and I have an amazing boyfriend, Theo. I'm quite beautiful and popular too which I'm not saying to brag, I'm just stating the truth. So that is my life. The life of Tia-Jade Garcia. *** What she didn't know was that every high has a low and that the higher you rise, the lower you fall and the more painful that fall is. Follow her story as she loses everybody she ever cared for and thereby her happiness. See her fight all of her demons by herself. Watch her fall in love...with herself because the only person's love you'll always need is yours. This is her self-love story.

If I Try (Lesbian Story) by Balueyes

My life in ruins, this is where I'm at currently. I was living a lie, lying to people and most importantly to myself. You can act straight all you want, you can try to convince yourself that, but no matter how hard you try. The truth is always revealed. What did I do? I stroked her face, and told her she was still beautiful, then I bent down and kissed her. One of those soft, yet deep, gut wrenching, I'll always love you, but I have to let you go, goodbye kisses. Then I rested my forehead on hers and closed my eyes. I saw the past that we had, all of the memories we had together, I took them in, I felt the feelings again, I processed them. Then I saw the dreams that we dreamed for our future, I saw all of our plans that we made, I felt them, I felt the pain of what would never be, and then I released it all. I didn't realize I was sobbing until I felt her hand graze over the tears. I opened my eyes, blinked away the tears I had left, and smiled. She returned my smile. We knew at that point that no matter what happened, we would be ok.............. This is my struggle, this is my journey. Join me for the ride, but make sure you wear your helmet.

The Street Fighter (#Wattys2014) by KenZ_Dizzy95

"Talk to you about it?" I asked with a dark laugh. "it's not as easy as you make it sound," "Yes, Garret! Talking! You know what that is right? It's very easy! You just open your mouth and let the words that are in your head, come out of your mouth." "It's not that simple," I fought down emotions that were building up. "Yes, it is! See, i'm doing it right now!" "No-it's not!" "Yes!" "No!" "Yes! just talk, dang it!-" "You just expect it to be easy to talk about my dead parents?! About how guilty I feel for not visiting their grave for the past 11 years?! I didn't even realize how long it's been, I had pretty much forgotten about them for 11 years! Do you know what kind of guilt is eating at me right now!" I shouted in angst, my hands grabbing at the clothes on top of my head and pushing it into myself, wanting to just be shielded away from everything I was feeling, guilt, sadness, from thinking about more people I've lost in my life. Before I could even react, Keeley's tiny arms wrapped themselves around my torso. ~  Garret had a difficult life. His parent's died when he was 10, and he got moved around for 4 year's in foster care. He finally find's a home where he feels like he's family, He has a mom, dad and a brother. 4 years later things happen and everything start's to go wrong. People die and people you thought you knew show a whole different side. Garret finds himself distancing from everybody. Because if he's not close to anybody, they cant get hurt. Right?  One day while at a fight he runs into Keeley, who is a spirited and confident little fireball. when they met it left an impression on Garret, soon he finds himself wanting to know her more. and soon, he find's himself falling for her.  Everyone Garret's ever loved has died, has gotten hurt, or stabbed him in the back.will he be able to trust her enough to let her close,or push her away to keep them both from getting hurt? © 2013

In Love With Blindfolds On by cjacks1124

I gave the best of myself to someone who didn't have anything to lose. I didn't know how to avoid my lover's toxic and abusive flames. My lover's twisted words were like a maze inside of my head that I couldn't escape. Sadly, my lover's actions hypnotized my thoughts and paralyzed my thinking. I learned the hard way that love isn't leaning in for a kiss, and a fist meets you halfway. Love isn't being a punching bag because someone decided they wanted to beat on you today. Love isn't saying I love you just because someone wants to keep you to themselves. I tried to be there for my lover, but I learned it is impossible to fix the broken pieces when the glass has shattered. There will always be pieces that are not repairable. However, I kept going right back to the person who I needed to walk away from. I was afraid, and I wasn't brave enough to wake up from this nightmare! I made the choice to suffer when life is meant to be lived and enjoyed. Will I find the courage to know my worth and know that I deserve better than the distasteful lies that are whispered in my ears? Will I have the strength to fight my insecurities? Will, I set myself free, or will I let my love be the death of me?

BROKEN COURAGE (Broken Redemption Book 3) by ArianaClarkAuthor

While tortured and held captive as a prisoner of war, she became my reason to keep breathing. The force that fueled my will to fight. To survive. When I woke after the rescue to discover the life I thought I was coming home to was but a figment of my imagination, hallucinations brought about by pain, desperation, and isolation... it nearly broke me. Fifteen years since I first lost her, at last, we have a second chance. Holding her in my arms, finally feeling the warmth of her skin as she melts under my touch, is like a dream. She and her two little girls are now as essential to my existence as the air I breathe. However, just as things start falling into place, the universe steps in, threatening to take it all away. I used to think that choosing her cost me everything I'd ever loved, but now I see that in choosing her and her children, I have the chance to reclaim all that I lost. They are my salvation. My true path to redemption. Which is why I'll leave no stone unturned, why I will scorch this world to the ground if that's what it takes to save them. And when I do, I will fight to convince her once and for all they are meant to be mine, just as I was destined to be theirs.

The Monster Amongst Us by urfunsizemami

When you're little you're surrounded by people that you're supposed to trust and feel safe with. The people God gave you are supposed to protect and nourish you, they're supposed to encourage positive growth, teach you right from wrong. So where along the lines, does an urge so sinister come into the mix? How are you taught to handle dealing with these types of situations, that most people don't have to face in their lifetime? How can anyone then stand by, defending these acts created against an innocent child? Feeling ostracized by every family member or person they have ever had to tell their truth to, some just to defend the monster? How can you then justify this? Love is love right? No matter the cost, right? How about falling in love with someone so manipulative, so deceitful, so evil and cruel, a cold hard liar. Claiming they are a child of God yet disguised as the Devil himself wreaking havoc, trauma and so much hurt and pain on innocent beings? It's time to face the judgement that lies ahead of all the evil they've committed. Here we dive into..... The Monsters Amongst Us.

Doubts 2 by SherryB915

Part 2 of "Doubts" It was that same feeling I felt deep inside me the day my grandparents left me. My stomach began to cringe. My throat was in knots. My breathing had gotten hard. My instincts were telling me something just wasn't right. I felt useless and alone... I had always knew pain my whole life but this was next level. That feeling of holding back and regret filled my veins with agony. I was lost in my thoughts. My heart felt colder and colder with every minute that passed by. Who am I ? Who am I really ? What is my purpose in this life that I lived? That I once knew ..... why did this bad luck fall upon my life? What did I do to deserve this ? I'm cursed. I have to be. I cried so much in that hospital bed that no tears seemed to want to fall anymore. I had no tears left in me to shed. When Akeem left this room, I knew it would be the last time that I would see him. My better half. My Ace. My love. My husband. My life. Gone. Forever. It wasn't confirmed but I knew it. I just knew it. Life fucked me hard. So why not throw it back.

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Slide 1 of 9

THAT FIRST BREAK (Broken Redemption Prequel 1) cover

The leaving 11 years on on going stopped up dating for a awhile cover

A Self-love Story cover

If I Try (Lesbian Story) cover

The Street Fighter (#Wattys2014) cover

In Love With Blindfolds On cover

BROKEN COURAGE (Broken Redemption Book 3) cover

The Monster Amongst Us cover

THAT FIRST BREAK (Broken Redemption Prequel 1)

Choosing her cost me everything I'd ever loved... including her. I had everything a guy could ask for, a loving family, the perfect small-town life, and a promising future I had worked hard for. It should have been enough. She was off-limits, my parent's best friend's daughter, practically my sister. I fought my feelings, pretending our soul-deep connection didn't exist. When she confessed she felt the same, I pushed her away, believing our friendship mattered more than temporary infatuation. That she agreed should have come as a relief, but it left me with this void I didn't know how to fill. It's what drove me to the bonfire that night. Right there, with our friends as witnesses, I claimed her. Told her I loved her and made her promises I shouldn't have made. Hours later, it all came crashing down in a whirlwind of fire and ashes. That one split-second choice to go after a girl that wasn't meant for me cost me everything I loved. I never should have crossed that line or given in. It's why she'll forever be my greatest love and deepest regret. This tragic story is the beginning of our end...