The End of the Beginning

I am seriously contemplating jumping off this gate. It feels like the crashing waves are taunting me. Tempting me to just leap for the adrenaline. Just to feel anything. Just to feel alive again. Everything I do. Every time I try to think about anything, my mind just circles back to him. The one thought in my mind is his warm and kind face, his sparkling gray eyes with his dark brown hair, shining like the light at the end of the tunnel. I'm sitting on the Golden Gate with a bottle of beer in one hand and a small shiny razor blade in the other.