Unwanted
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WpMetadataReadOngoing<5 mins
WpMetadataNoticeLast published Tue, Jul 11, 2017
1 cut means I'm pathetic, 2 cuts means I'm usless, 3 cuts means I'm unwanted. I don't eat anymore Like I used to, are you happy? I can't sleep anymore because the voices an nightmares I have won't let me, are you proud? If I cut deeper will it make you want me? Will it make you want to have me around? If I magically became skinny would you be proud to talk to me in the hallways? Are you proud of what I've become? The "Unwanted" girl that walks these hallways with puffy eyes every morning because she can't eat at home without feeling fat, because she can't live her life without having complications, because her only friend is in her head? How do you not see what's behind my fake smile? What hides behind the hoodie I hold onto because its the only thing that makes me feel safe. Am I just your mistake? Would you go back in time to make sure you could erase me from the human existence? My name is Esme. I'm 17 years old and I feel Unwanted, here is my story.
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"I smile everyday. I live my life like nothing is wrong with me. No one would ever guess that I'm screaming inside or that I've secretly been hiding this huge part of my life. No one would ever know that I cry myself to sleep at night or that deep down I'm starving for help." Welcome to Anorexia. Your hostess is Ana. She'll take over from here. Suffering alone inside of your mind from a terrifying mental disorder, is something that even those who battle such a thing every day, cannot fully understand. It's like being alone 24/7 yet it's never quiet inside of your head. You can't stop the voices. You can't control your emotions. As it gets worse, you lose control of your body all together. You become prey to your disease and You can't fight back. That is what it's like for someone who has spent years of their life suffering in silence from an eating disorder. Fighting a monster that you have no chance of beating. It's almost impossible to describe the type of torture that consumes your mind. Hell. It's equivalent to pure hell.

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