..:Just My Thoughts:..
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This is just a little collection of a book that I have filled all of my feelings in...Whether it's good or bad...I will share it with you..to show that you not going through it alone...
Hopefully, you find some comfort or relief in them :)
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Behind My Eyes.
come pick my mind and stay awhile, make yourself comfortable. it's awfully lonely in here. - inside this book, you'll find five distinct parts: simply me, which tells you almost everything you need to know about me. you, which tells you about my experience with love and the state of bliss it brings you. after you, which tells you about my experience with heartbreak and hate. nightmares, which is every scary thing that occurs in my mind and things that instill fear in those who read it. the book closes with recovery, where we explore self-confidence and self-discovery. these are the inner workings of my mind, i'm not going to sugar coat it for you: it's a sad, depressing place. this all comes from the pages of my journals so i'm sparing you the tear-stained pages, consider yourself lucky. hope you enjoy! - feel free to comment or message me :)Lengkap
First Love, The Sinner & The Saint
Have you ever felt like life wasn't enough, like you were going through the motions day in, day out, all you wanted was a change. Well one day I woke up and made that change, I was no longer the well behaved boy that did as he was told, I was a new person and I wanted to do things my way. I wanted to do what made me feel alive, even if that was murder of innocent people, I wanted to grab someone and watch the life drain out of their faces, it pleased me.. it made me feel alive. This is my story of heartbreak and turmoil, friends lost and friends gained, families torn apart by my needs. This is my life, and I'm proud to be the man I am. Dated created 9th August 2020 Date completed 15th August 2020 Word count 50,000-60,000Lengkap
Someone New ✓
"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Who I am doesn't matter. How I got here doesn't matter. What matters now is I'm getting help, right? That's what they tell me here. They tell me that the road to recovery feels like a terrible butt fuck, but the fact that you're on the path to begin with, is all that matters. So as I sit in this circle of fuck ups, I realize just how different I am from them. I didn't attempt suicide because my mother was a crack addict who didn't want me. My father wasn't abusive. I didn't have a sibling die in a car accident. I was never really bullied either. I attempted suicide because, for the first time in years, I thought I had found something that could make me feel again... and after not feeling much at all for far too long, perhaps I went a bit overboardLengkap
The leaving 11 years on on going stopped up dating for a awhile
The leaving. It was hard, tragic , painful, yet it had to be done, I needed to save my life. I didn't want to start again, this would be the story of finding myself, pulling myself back together, reuniting the happy go lucky youngster I had once been. The shock of leaving took more of a toll on me than I thought it would. I had asked two people to help me move out of the house I had shared with my partner for 8 years, we had been together 23 years in total. The move was done in total secrecy, my partner could never know in advance, it was a very scary time. I had moved various things out of the house and secured a rent on a property nearby. The house I picked was near the School the children went to, and my oldest lad was going to be near his best friend. My Mother told me of the property it was advertised on the web, we both went and had a look, even that was scary, I didn't want to be seen by anyone and became paranoid that I would be caught out. For many months I lived on a new kind of fear, the fear of someone finding out that I planned to leave my abusive partner, though of course no one knew my seemingly happy, funny, generous partner was abusive. Finding the house was one thing, getting the various companies to connect the house and exchanging the information of my current address so they could varify that I was, who I said I was almost drove me mad. The day came to leave, My Mother and a very dear Friend came round as early as possible, we packed as much as we could. This included taking the boys clothes, bedding, toys, stuff from the garden, my stuff. We had 3 cars the packing seem to take all day. By the end we had to get going to be able to unpack, leaving me time to pick up the boys from School and settle them in their new home. I couldn't do it at first,I started to cry then scream, to leave the world I had put so much of my life into, and now in a split second would be leaving was breaking my heart.Lengkap
Icarus
Summary: This story is about an incredible unique autistic girl and her two equally incredible best friends. Will they ever get out of the friend zone? A little taste of the story: Is it a sin to love someone too much? To say I miss her is an understatement. I can't eat. Can't sleep. Can't function. She is constantly on my mind as she dwelled herself deep inside my heart. My heart aches for her. Every time I think of her, I smile but my heart hurts like hell because she lives far away. Too far. Sometimes all I can do is lie in bed and hope to fall asleep before I fall apart. Is it wrong to love someone this deeply at such an early age? I have inappropriate thoughts about her...about us. Not, as we are presently but grown up as adults. I'm jealous of my twin brother because he wants to take her from me. I can't let go of what's making me sad because its also the only thing that makes me happy. Her. I cannot lose her, because if I do, I will lose my best friend, my smile, my heart, my soul mate, my everything. If it is a sin, I don't think I want to be forgiven because I truly believe that God has sent her into my life to give me something to fight for, to show me there is love in this world, to give me hope and to bring me joy. All the proof I need in God is in her. She is a gift from heaven." ⚠️WARNING ⚠️ * language *drugs & alcohol * violence *assault & rape *nudity & sexLengkap
Behind every mean girl...there's a tragedy
The average human being spends every second of his day fighting against the force of nature to see another day. But I'm different. I'm not afraid of outside forces to take my life away - only myself. Approximately 10 years ago, something happened to me. Something really bad. But I'm not allowed to talk about it. As a way to release my frustration, I give hell to my body and everyone I come in contact with - especially my parents. No one knows about what happened except the ones who did it...and Him. But he didn't stay. Now, he's back and he's not talking either. I want to stop hurting, I need to stop. Make me stop.Lengkap
Read This And You'll See
I know not a single soul on planet earth asked for this, but hey, here I am. I think we can all unanimously agree that Life can can suck from time to time...or sometimes just all the time. But I think I can safely assure you that despite that, there is meaning behind the convoluted and wrecked world we all coexist in, something that only pertains to us and only that we can understand. I will share with you my understanding of the world, and maybe, just maybe, it'll help you figure out yours. Go all the way. PLUS ULTRA!Lengkap
"Don't Fuck With Me" *Completed*
... one thing I don't regret is that if I 'did' move my "friends" would of spread a rumor about me that I would had quickly put a stop to... ugh, I hate it when you put your all into something and then it straight up blows up back at you. Completed Re-edited Please don't judge this book. It was my very first book and it's all over the place 😅 I was not expecting my first book to have over 1k reads 😳Lengkap
Tumor Love
Sometimes life don't go the way we planned. Sometimes we end up feeling so low, and alone. Like we're in a dark hole with no one around us, but then suddenly there's a light at the end of the tunnel. And I guess what I'm trying to say is.. You're my light, the one who helped me through the worst time in my life - And for that, I am thankful. I'm thankful that I met you, but I also hate you. I hate what you did to me, because you made me fall in love.. And then my world fell apart once again. [WARNING!! Contains mature themes, and languageLengkap
𝐻𝑖𝑠 𝑐𝑢𝑟𝑠𝑒, 𝐻𝑖𝑠 𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒
"It's getting harder each day, so much harder. It drains me to have to constantly put up a mask, hiding how I really feel behind a smile that isn't even true. I don't think I'll ever find that easy, because it's not. The easy part for me is lying, it always has been. Telling them I'm fine always works. But the hardest thing... the hardest thing is realising that no one hears my pleads, my cries and my screams... leaving me to fix my broken mind." ~~ Cooper Bryan is a young boy living with his mother in California, he lost his brother and father when he was 7 and now, his mother is moving on, she's getting remarried. From bullying, to awful step brothers, to having monsters in his head, Cooper fears he won't make it through his teenage years... but he's surviving... and he's doing it damn well too. This... this is his story, with many ups and a million downs, this... this is Cooper Bryan's troubled life. ~~ DISCLAIMER: I do not own any photos/Videos or songs used in this Wattpad story. They were either found on google or YouTubeLengkap
come pick my mind and stay awhile, make yourself comfortable. it's awfully lonely in here. - inside this book, you'll find five distinct parts: simply me, which tells you almost everything you need to know about me. you, which tells you about my experience with love and the state of bliss it brings you. after you, which tells you about my experience with heartbreak and hate. nightmares, which is every scary thing that occurs in my mind and things that instill fear in those who read it. the book closes with recovery, where we explore self-confidence and self-discovery. these are the inner workings of my mind, i'm not going to sugar coat it for you: it's a sad, depressing place. this all comes from the pages of my journals so i'm sparing you the tear-stained pages, consider yourself lucky. hope you enjoy! - feel free to comment or message me :)
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