The Barbie Act

The Barbie Act

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WpMetadataNoticeLast published Fri, Oct 13, 2017
I was that weird, awkward, antisocial kid, that. dyed their hair different colors every month. Wore Hot Topic clothes, listen to My Chemical Romance. But after a year it's all different almost like opposite . It's like I'm a Barbie doll, i'm miss popular, I have all the makeup I can cover up my face with, nicest outfits. But I wish I could change back to the real me who doesn't want to wear every type of makeup or be the nicest dressed . Everyone talks behind your back its like they hate you or they want you in their bed . It feels like I'm fake, I'm starving myself, lying to myself that I'm happy when really I wish I was Six feet under ground . Does all of this change when an old friend comes back to town?
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highschoollovers
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"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Who I am doesn't matter. How I got here doesn't matter. What matters now is I'm getting help, right? That's what they tell me here. They tell me that the road to recovery feels like a terrible butt fuck, but the fact that you're on the path to begin with, is all that matters. So as I sit in this circle of fuck ups, I realize just how different I am from them. I didn't attempt suicide because my mother was a crack addict who didn't want me. My father wasn't abusive. I didn't have a sibling die in a car accident. I was never really bullied either. I attempted suicide because, for the first time in years, I thought I had found something that could make me feel again... and after not feeling much at all for far too long, perhaps I went a bit overboard

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