My Journal
- Reads 67
- Votes 1
- Parts 17
i decide to write my story
writing is like therapy to me
i dealt with depression for long time
i have mental illness
i'm tired of people treating me like i'm nothing
please no hate
if i misspelled some words sorry i will correct them if i don't make sentence sorry but i hope you understand i'm not very good at this
Please seek help if your dealing with this mental illness etc.
All Rights Reserved
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Cold Water
[BWWM] I was only twelve years old when the world turned cold. The day my mom died in that car accident, I felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over my heart. My dad, who had always been my hero, suddenly became a stranger, filled with rage and blame. He couldn't see that I was hurting, too; he only saw me as a reminder of his loss. The accusations cut deep. He said it was my fault for being there, for not doing something to save her. For being the reason she was in the car in the first place. In the years that followed, things only got worse. The abuse started gradually-a harsh word here, a shove there-but it escalated, leaving scars that I carried long after the physical pain faded. I was drowning in my own despair, struggling to keep my head above water while my father's anger raged like a storm around me. I only had a break from his anger when I started living with Aunt Dina-my mom's older sister. Well, that was because she found me nearly dead on my bed after I took a dozen pills. I was tired of living. I had hit rock bottom. The harsh whispers that followed me around and the stares at school. I pretended not to notice, like it didn't bother me. But it did. I was alone. Then came Athalia, a ray of sunshine cutting through my darkness. With her, I felt something I hadn't felt in years-happiness. She became my light through the darkness and my lifeline. ••••••••••• ● Warnings ⚠️ ~ Mention of suicide ~ Anxiety attacks ~ Rape attempt ~ Mention of self-harm ~ DepressionComplete
CO:Crazy One
The world can be unfair to people,Do they deserve to live like that?Does the world care?Do we care?My Old life ended,My new life just started.But it felt like i missed a part.NO memories.We have problems.Does the world care,Do WE care?We don't share our problems.We solve it on our own,But sometimes problems come back,even when you don't want it... How stupid was i ? HELLO IT'S ME, THE WRITER WHO'S CRINGING AT THE BAD GRAMMAR AND SPELLING OF THE 13/14 YEAR OLD ME. CURRENTLY IN TEARS BECAUSE WHY DID I NOT CHECK THE SPELLING. HOW COULD SO MANY PEOPLE READ IT.Complete
The Midnight Rantings Of Someone Lost
Some of these will be short stories, others letters to both real and fictional people, and really whatever else I see fit to add Also, I put this under poetry bc it was that or random And i'll be changing the cover in the near future
Fix Me, I'm Broken
Walking into an empty house is normal to me. I guess I got tired of saying 'I'm home' when nobody is home to reply. It wasn't always like this. I remember when our family was close. Now we don't see each other any more. We don't talk to each other. We don't eat with each other. We don't ACKNOWLEDGE each other. This all happened after my 'Mother' killed herself. My father blames me. This is my story about how I learned to not count on anyone else but myself. I'm broken. I'm used. No one can fix me. But when the New Boy in town tries to fix me, everything will change. Good change or Bad change, I don't know. Only time will tell. I want to enter this story in the #Wattys2015 please help me out and vote and comment on my story. I'll really appreciate it!!! #Wattys2015 COPYRIGHTED © 2014 BY Anallely ALL RIGHTS RESERVED ®Complete
Her Breaking Point
He had rules for a reason, or thats what he said. I did something wrong I got punished. I spoke out of turn, I got punished. I looked at him or ate without permission, I got punished. Haven thats what they named me funny isn't it? Ironic really. They named me Haven because my mom would say I was her 'Safe Haven'. What a pile of shit that was. She left willingly, she didn't depart because of some tragic accident. My father didn't kill her. She left because she was a coward who didn't want kids. As soon as my older brother went to college she left. I knew she hated me. I was the product of her love with another man. A constant reminder that her life didn't work out the way it was planned. He who ever he was is a phantom in its own. A deep rooted fantasy never going to come true. My brother left, my mother left, my grandma ignored, and my father broke. They let me give up hope on escaping and then decided to play hero. But I haven't forgotten everything I went through. Guilt consumes my brother but I don't care, you don't get to leave and then buy a reprieve of trying to save someone who has been dead for years. Besides lets just be honest I reached my breaking point long ago.Complete
You don't know me
⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ Not for the faint of heart, I explore dark parts of my mind and unfurl them for your own enjoyment. All of these stories are true. You don't know me, and you're never going to. This is basically just a shitty diary of my life with very few details as to who I am, Don't want to scare you off. Feel free to read but I don't really care. I'm just a screwed up guy that everyone knows and nobody cares about really. If you can't tell I'll probably swear quite a bit in this so if you don't like that I'm sorry, but this really isn't a good read anyway it's just me complaining about the fact I still exist. Actually no, whilst I did start this to complain about my life, the stories are fluctuating, as I discover I am infact worthy of love, even I don't believe it at all times. I hope you enjoy my rantings. ⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️
Beneath The Surface: Book Two
"After every time I had wasted on someone who didn't matter, you came along and didn't even touch me. You didn't hold my hand, kiss me or even give me high fives. I'd just watch you from afar, falling more and more in love with what I saw. I couldn't care less about not touching you. All I cared about was if you were safe. And I've found that that is what love truly is and truly should be." (Updates every Wednesday and Saturday!)Complete
Someone New ✓
"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Who I am doesn't matter. How I got here doesn't matter. What matters now is I'm getting help, right? That's what they tell me here. They tell me that the road to recovery feels like a terrible butt fuck, but the fact that you're on the path to begin with, is all that matters. So as I sit in this circle of fuck ups, I realize just how different I am from them. I didn't attempt suicide because my mother was a crack addict who didn't want me. My father wasn't abusive. I didn't have a sibling die in a car accident. I was never really bullied either. I attempted suicide because, for the first time in years, I thought I had found something that could make me feel again... and after not feeling much at all for far too long, perhaps I went a bit overboardComplete
The Forgotten Child
This is my first ever story I wrote by myself with no help, and it took me roughly around 6 months to write. Please enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! It may not be the best written or told story, but it was a way to help me.Complete
Suffer
Everyone suffers no matter how much we think we're alone, there maybe someone out there more disconnected from the rest of the world. If you had the power to help the other and didn't take it does that make you a bad person? If you had one chance to correct the world would you take it? If you were given one power what would it be? No matter what choice you make it will come haunting back to you. The good the bad there's a fine line between what people perceive as good and bad it's up to you to decide that.Complete
[BWWM] I was only twelve years old when the world turned cold. The day my mom died in that car accident, I felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over my heart. My dad, who had always been my hero, suddenly became a stranger, filled with rage and blame. He couldn't see that I was hurting, too; he only saw me as a reminder of his loss. The accusations cut deep. He said it was my fault for being there, for not doing something to save her. For being the reason she was in the car in the first place. In the years that followed, things only got worse. The abuse started gradually-a harsh word here, a shove there-but it escalated, leaving scars that I carried long after the physical pain faded. I was drowning in my own despair, struggling to keep my head above water while my father's anger raged like a storm around me. I only had a break from his anger when I started living with Aunt Dina-my mom's older sister. Well, that was because she found me nearly dead on my bed after I took a dozen pills. I was tired of living. I had hit rock bottom. The harsh whispers that followed me around and the stares at school. I pretended not to notice, like it didn't bother me. But it did. I was alone. Then came Athalia, a ray of sunshine cutting through my darkness. With her, I felt something I hadn't felt in years-happiness. She became my light through the darkness and my lifeline. ••••••••••• ● Warnings ⚠️ ~ Mention of suicide ~ Anxiety attacks ~ Rape attempt ~ Mention of self-harm ~ Depression
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