High hopes

High hopes

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WpMetadataNoticeLast published Mon, Oct 16, 2017
"It's the first day of school. New school, new beginning, new me. I've changed so much over the year. My parents always told me that people change and friends drift, but i never really believed them. Last year I started school with friends. People called me popular, but i didn't see it nor did I label myself. I just thought of myself as my own person. Towards the end of the year i got less and less outgoing and got more and more shy. I lost my friends and made one new one. Claire....she's my bestfriend, my only friend. She was the only one who stuck around after everything. She dealt with me at my worst, she knew me better than i knew myself. Claire is a friend that i don't want too loose and i am hoping that it doesn't happen. I don't trust anyone but her. This whole journaling thing is new for me, but my counselor said that writing things down might help me instead of breaking down in the middle of class or anywhere for that matter. Anyway before i have to go to class i want this year too be better. I'm hoping to make new friends but not getting close i don't need too get close to someone who will probably leave in the end. I'm hoping to get good grades too, better than last year anyway. Well i gotta catch the bus so i'll "write you later" ;) haha i am so dumb... Sincerely, Madi"
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They say what's in the past keep it in the past but I wanted to know all about my past. It was things that I didn't know and that I wanted and needed to know! But my life turned upside down when my past is exactly what I should have left alone. Now if you ask me how it all began, I don't exactly remember but I know it started when I moved in with my grandma who I haven't met in all my twenty years of living. I have been in and out of foster homes since I can remember, living with families I knew nothing about. Being the outcast and them constantly asking me what's wrong because I simply did not speak. The only thing that kept me sane was my good grades throughout school. I got the satisfaction of doing the one thing that people kept telling me over and over I couldn't do. I stayed to myself and graduated high school with honors, getting a full-ride scholarship to any college of my choice. Of course, by having this accomplishment, it didn't make it any easier for me between my foster families. To them, I became the girl who was better than them. But I didn't care because when I turned twenty I finally got to start making my own choices. This is where I wonder if the first choice I made was the right one. The first choice I made was to go live off-campus with my grandmother during my first semester in college. I ask myself how could I be so stupid? But you will see just how stupid I was. Or was I?

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