Her Savior (Donny Pangilinan)
  • Reads 883
  • Votes 50
  • Parts 9
  • Reads 883
  • Votes 50
  • Parts 9
Ongoing, First published Nov 01, 2017
He was my light in the dark. 
He was my rainbow after the rain. 
He was the lyrics to my song.. and he was everything to me.
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What we have is just now. As long as she loves me. As long as she wants to be with me. As long as there is 'we'. I love her! But the rainbow is not just a blend of vibrant and bright colors. It doesn't even stay for a long period of time-- just enough for us to see and in a fleet of time is gone, leaving us wondering if it's real. A rainbow doesn't have black and white. It wasn't just like that. Same as love. Same as us. There were times that i want to give her up. Not because my love did fade, rather, my love is too much. Too much that letting her go is the only option left for her to choose me without hesitation, without guilt, freed of lies. I want her to grow, to weigh things as it is. I want her to make me feel that being with me is her choice. I want her to realize that i am hers and that she have to surrender herself to me as well. I want her to love me because that is the way she feels and not because it was the safest way. Being with her is paradise. It was a mixture of colored pastel. It was too vibrant to explain. But at a sudden twist of downs and ups, we are shaking. Loving her has become my weakness. The weakening thought of losing her when I fuck up is too much to run me insane. I'm overreacting perhaps. But being with her, means walking in a narrow-road of heaven. There's no security, no assurance. One wrong move, and I'll be slipping away. Just in the never ending pain of darkness, of solitude, of self-struggle. Loving her has become my addiction. I couldn't get enough of it. But so they say, what's too much can cause harm. Maybe I'm loving her too much that she finds it hard to breathe when i'm around. But yes, it is just a wishful thinking; things that I'll surely not going to say to her because i will never ever earn the courage to say so. We are just nothing but a 'fateful coincidence.'
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Bawat kirot ay may katumbas na paghihiganti. Yes, every pain demands a payback. That's the first thing I learned when I loved him. Not consciously, not right away-but slowly, in pieces. He taught me how to love. His love was wildfire-reckless, consuming, beautiful in the way it ruined everything. I thought I was lucky to have it. I thought he saw something in me. Maybe he did. Maybe he saw the parts that were already breaking. He taught me how to bend the rules, how to silence the voice in my head that said "this isn't right." With him, right and wrong blurred until they didn't matter. Until all that mattered was staying close enough not to lose him, but distant enough not to drown. And then came pain. He taught me pain in a thousand unspoken ways. In words that stung more than silence. In apologies that came too late. In touches that lingered with regret. And pain... And pain. Again and again No fairy tale. No forever. It was never about soulmates. It was just... a story. A complicated, messy, painful story. But still, I gambled. I bet my heart on something that didn't deserve it. And in the end, that so-called love? It destroyed me. It didn't just break me-it broke everything I cared about. Everyone I loved. It burned through every soft thing I had left inside me. Because that love... Was disastrous. Behind the illusion of love hid everything I was afraid of: pain, betrayal, lies, manipulation. A heartbreak wrapped in promises. A knife dressed like a kiss. But here's what no one tells you: after heartbreak comes something sharper. Stronger. Revenge. And revenge-it's not sweet. It's not cold. It's best served hot. The kind of heat that doesn't ask for closure. It takes it. I, who was a he, now turned into a she. I will serve pain out of pain. Not to mirror the cruelty, but to remind the world: You don't get to hurt someone like me and walk away unburned.
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His last year will be worst as hell.... His quiet life will put in danger... His happiness will turn to sacrifices.... His life will be ruined... His difference makes him nobody from them... He's the toy of all... But... what if, when he wakes up he indeed one of them? Will he enter from their worlds? Will he sacrifice for his happiness? But what if...he falls in trap of love? Would he ready to sacrifice his happiness and face the consequences? How far would he will wait to bring back his beloved?... Love will TEACH you how to FIGHT.... but, Love will give you a REASONS to LET GO... I'M ALWAYS FINE.... by:lalalans_m start-4-20-2020 HOPE YOU WILL LIKE IT... 😁😁😁