Looking For A Lost Memory
- Reads 301
- Votes 42
- Parts 32
MatureOngoing5h 31m
Last published Sun, May 29, 2022
"My mood is still the same. I'm trying to grow and be better, but I can't avoid these feelings. It starts in my head. Thoughts, feelings, people, places. I think of all of these things in a rushed blur. Then I think of my heart. I feel disgusting. I hate taking medication, but there's no alternative. I want to be fixed. I want everything to go back to the way they were. I wish Arabia never happened. I wish I never talked to anyone, that way Maria wouldn't have died, I wish I wasn't so cold. Normal. I don't even know the meaning of those words anymore." - Hirosha.
****
Uneventful emotions swirl out of control, Kaiden Hamada is looking for an escape, runs away, finding discarded memoirs, carelessly taking them only to find they have much more importance.
"All I know is that we have to keep reading, I need to find closure, or something worth more behind these pages. He leads, we follow. I have no idea where, but maybe that's the whole point of this. "
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The things I knew that were once unethical, were bound to be saintly. The dreams I dreamt once upon a time, seemed to be an epitome of nightmares. The heart I thought I stole long ago, always belonged to someone else. The crimes I have committed all my life, became a handful of lessons that I ought to learn. The world I looked up to once, became a mortal enemy of mine. The family I thought would disown me, fought my battles for me. The life I never imagined I'd live, sadly it became a life I'd rather live than die. Lastly, the guilt I carried in me for the each and every second of my living, was a poison spreading and gradually banishing everything around me. Clearly, I was bounded by the past! Never have I imagined for the galaxy of guilt in me to steadily transform into a matter of great; Love. No, it wasn't for my dead sister, or for the woman I once claimed to love, or for my money-grubbing father, or even for the woman who was destined for me. Majestically, it was for Someone who I never ever thought it would be for; My Maker. Well, it's mind-blowing how the ugliest of matters bring out the most beautiful of articles! -Guilt is a gift from Allah, warning you that what you are doing is violating your soul.- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Started: 22/12/2017, 7:15 pm. [All Rights Reserved, froward 2017]
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