A Broken Optimist
  • Reads 771
  • Votes 106
  • Parts 60
  • Time 1h 13m
  • Reads 771
  • Votes 106
  • Parts 60
  • Time 1h 13m
Complete, First published Nov 18, 2017
Mature
She's a lost soul, searching for Froot Loops in a world of Cheerios.


Emotions. 
Inflicted by words,
Creating signals to connect those emotions.
A pang in your heart, the dull ache of love,
a tedious, meaningless thing to some.
The entire thing to others.
Confusing, at the least.
All consuming, at the most.
We bundle it inside, 
Hide it in boxes, 
In the deepest crevices of our persona,
Then suddenly, it burst free, tumbling into the atmosphere, filling every hour, every moment.
Words convey it. Words share it.
Through words, our emotions are liberated.

Disclaimer: I wrote this throughout the course of a year. It had its ups and it's down in emotion. It ends on a happy note, I think. It has some overdramatic things in which my past self annoys me sometimes. But it also has some good pieces of thought. 

The world sucks.
I can't promise that it's not going to suck,
Because it probably always will.
But there will be times
Where the good in the world
Makes it suck a little less.
All Rights Reserved
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I gave the best of myself to someone who didn't have anything to lose. I didn't know how to avoid my lover's toxic and abusive flames. My lover's twisted words were like a maze inside of my head that I couldn't escape. Sadly, my lover's actions hypnotized my thoughts and paralyzed my thinking. I learned the hard way that love isn't leaning in for a kiss, and a fist meets you halfway. Love isn't being a punching bag because someone decided they wanted to beat on you today. Love isn't saying I love you just because someone wants to keep you to themselves. I tried to be there for my lover, but I learned it is impossible to fix the broken pieces when the glass has shattered. There will always be pieces that are not repairable. However, I kept going right back to the person who I needed to walk away from. I was afraid, and I wasn't brave enough to wake up from this nightmare! I made the choice to suffer when life is meant to be lived and enjoyed. Will I find the courage to know my worth and know that I deserve better than the distasteful lies that are whispered in my ears? Will I have the strength to fight my insecurities? Will, I set myself free, or will I let my love be the death of me?