The Fucking Heroin
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- Votes 3
- Parts 1
Ongoing<5 mins
Last published Thu, Nov 23, 2017
Você já imáginou se o o Anti-Herói mais retardado da Marvel tivesse uma filha? E se ela fosse vinte vezes mais retardada que ele? Ia ser uma loucura...
Jade Wilson (se prenuncia Djeide) é uma garota que estava no fundo do poço, não como se estivesse em uma desgraça, Jade já caiu em um poço a alguns anos atrás, sorte que o poço era vazio, Ela morava na casa dos pais adotivos e quando tinha seis anos, caiu em um poço, todo mundo achou que ela tinha morrido, o poço realmente era muito fundo. Os pais chamaram os bombeiros, policial, para-médicos, tudo... E quando a tiraram perceberam que a garota estava somente desmaiada, sim Jade não morreu e não sai de um poço igual a Samara Morgan para matar as pessoas.
Desde então sua vida nunca foi mais a mesma, seus pais mudaram totalmente com ela, achando que a garota poderia ser igual aos Mutantes que eles vêem na TV. Sua infância virou uma bosta... ela não ligava, Jade sempre foi uma garota meio "foda-se parao o mundo, o que acontece, e o que as pessoas dizem"
Uma pena se Jade descobrisse que seu pai é um Mercenário doido de pedra... Jade não queria conhecer seus pais, uma vez ao orfanato, uma das irmãs havia encontrado indicios dos pais dela, mais ela não fez nem questão de saber.
Desbocada, Autoritária, Birrenta, Cabeça Quente, Sexy, Irônica Isso é apenas algumas qualidades e defeitos da Wilson, Quer saber mais? Leia a História...
JADE: MAIS QUE PORRA TÁ ACONTECENDO AQUI???????
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"Ⳕ⳨ ⲏⲉ ⳑⲉⲁⳳⲉ⳽ ⲩⲟⳙ ⳨ⲟⲅ ⲁⲛⲟⲧⲏⲉⲅ, ⲧⲏⲉⲅⲉ ⳕ⳽ ⲁⳑⲱⲁⲩ⳽ ⲏⳕ⳽ ⲙⲟⲧⲏⲉⲅ." "Jⲁ𝖽ⲉ ⲛⲟ- " Jade had always been a weird kid, and not in the 'I'm not like the other girls' way. It had kept her from making friends most of her life, so she spent her time practicing karate religiously, being a slut for Bruce Lee movies, and hanging out with her Abuela. Life wasn't perfect, but it wasn't horrible either. Then the dreams came. Abuela told her it was a sign, and she was right. After dying(?) in the most cliche way possible (Truck-kun spares no one), Jade wakes up in the middle of some festival after falling out of the sky, getting pointed at by some old guy. She assumed she was just dreaming again (or had finally lost it), but it soon becomes apparent that this is reality. A reality where Kung fu Panda characters are human, Po doesn't exist (which is kind of scary in an existential way), and SHE'S the Dragon Warrior. Yeah, no But no one listens to Jade when she says she's an Isekai protagonist, so Jade decides that if she has to suffer, everyone else has to suffer with her. Armed with nothing but a black belt in karate, her backpack, movie foreknowledge, the power of God and Anime, and apparently Kung fu trivia knowledge, Jade sets out to fuck shit up, while also making jokes no one understands.
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