In past, I was cheerful, positive, full of love and joy, until my father destroyed everything, took everything from me, turned me into a cold, heartless, and wrathful, no more happiness in my life.
Until I finally met her again, my old friend and also my first love, my world was so beautiful with her, everything was perfect with her.
All the beautiful memories I've been through with her for a long time... it crossed my mind, at the moment I looked into her eyes.
But there was nothing I could do, I just pretended not to remember her, didn't know her, and it broke me.
I want to hug her, I want to kiss her, I want to make her happy, but I can't.
I can't keep my promise to her, my promise to always be by her side, I've broken it, the fact that I abandoned her.
And I was so surprised after hearing she had an accident, which made her to lose her memory, and it was all because of me, that I had put her through it, that I had made her suffer.
It would have been better if it had been me, not her, all my fault, all this because of my selfishness and my stupidity.
She deserves happiness, she deserves someone who much better than me, who's capable of making her happier, not me, because I'm just giving her misery.
The exact words he threw at my face still haunts my dreams every single night and I think I'm starting to believe him.
"Wish I've never met you I was so young and stupid, no wonder no one wanted to be with you, you are just holding me down and I honestly just got bored, needed a new chapter in my life that was the main reason I did what I had to do to keep myself happy. I just don't want to lie to myself anymore. I can't do this. I need to be free for once in my life. I'm so relieved that I don't have to marry you anymore, it's like a dead weight lifted from my shoulders. JUST LEAVE! GET OUT NOW! ''
I just didn't know what to do that day I way so shocked, one minute we were one big happy family and the next he throws everything we build up as a family. I should had been warned by his actions the last month that we spend together.
He knew that he was my first for everything and that gave him a push on his ego. Always bragged about being my first and claiming power over the situation. I was blinded by all of his charms and I see that now, I'm so sorry I did not listen Laura, you were just trying to protect me , that's what best friends are for but I chose him and I am truly sorry. I promise I will get a way to show him that I am not just a waste of space and I am going to do it all just for me and my baby girl.
**WARNING**
Sexual language and mature content
Read at own risk ;)
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