THE BAD GIRL'S BOY

Promiscuity is addictive.

It's so safe. You are not at risk of getting hurt,

physically maybe ,

But emotionally ?

No

And the emotional pain is by far the worst.

I know this because I've experienced both.

Physical pain, from my alcoholic father, sexual abuse from his friends.

It hurt, it really did. I have scars to show.

But let me tell you, the worst type of hurt is the emotional pain. That pain you get when after years of building a wall around yourself, you FINALLY let someone in. You let that one special person in.

You bring down your walls.

You give your heart. You let him hold your heart in his palms even though you know the risks. You have so many dreams and fantasies about being with this person forever.

And he leads you on.

It feels good

But then he turns around and crushes your heart. He squeezes the life out of it and you feel pain that you never thought was humanly possible. You feel so much pain you can't breathe. And then ,

you become cold.

You stop feeling. You have no heart anymore. You become heartless, promiscuous, bad, really bad.

Yes , that happened to me.

Ben did that to me. It hurt. It hurt too much.

But now I'm safe . Because I'm the bad girl. The one who doesn't have a heart left to be broken.