Ramshackled Ants: Journal Entries
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- Parts 19
These are journal entries. They're pretty sporadic and I don't add dates. Expect a lot of cryptic poetry and possible venting. I own this shit, don't steal it. [poetic copyright]
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#77
nirvana
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Meraki
#44 in Poetry [4-5-17] Join me on my journey of self-discovery, my lows & my highs. I hope that I leave you feeling better. I hope that I have made you feel less lonely. This is me. This is 18 years of exploring my creativity, soul, passion, and love. This is Meraki. Thank you for your time. -Courtney Dorland follow my Instagram for excerpts and updates @poetrybycourtneyComplete
When There Was Me And You | Part 1
You were my First Love; toxic, unhealthy for my state. But i learned Love from you; you taught me what it meant to spend nights crying at the edge of my bed and how it felt to really smile. ************************* This is a collection of poetry for one series- love, pain, toxicity, heartbreak and memory. This is the first experience at love I had. I share with you my experiences, my thoughts, my recollections, my struggle and everything I felt. If you grew up having been deprived of love and then suddenly found yourself carrying what seems like the world's amount of love for someone else- I don't doubt you won't be able to relate, at one point in this poetry book you'll find yourself in me. ******* #1 in heartstrings/43 (6th september) #3 in nostalgia (20th march) #15 in poems/5.7k (11th september) #4 in experience (30th November) #5 in journal (june 2019) #2 in deep (june 2019)Complete
The Diary of Me
I have marked this story as "completed" but I don't know if it will ever actual be complete. This is my journal, my secrets, my thoughts. This is The Diary of Me.Complete
Words of life
This book is for you, who wants to read about what life can be like, most of the times. This book has reminders, poetry, tips and tricks, quotes, texts about meaning with life, happy moment and even sad moments. A little bit of everything life can throw at you. I have no filter to this book. Which means it's raw and genuine, and that is the goal. (You don't necessarily have to read from start to finish) If you for an example have a bad day, I have a chapter for you about seeing it thru a different perspective than what people normally tell you. Or if you feel like you want to know what happiness is or feels like, I have different definition of that in different chapters for you my dear! (And many more chapters, about everything you could think of) And maybe you know all of this already, and it glads me to hear. But give it a chance and maybe you'll find new ways to Incorporate it in your daily life. Or let it just be reminders for yourself. What ever works for you, love! - A.M🍷Complete![Inside my brain [Completed]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/52958712-256-k209868.jpg)
Inside my brain [Completed]
This is a continuation of my previous one, "poetry in emotion". This one's dedicated to the people who have helped me grow. Enjoy!Complete
Excerpts of A Chaotic Mind
Welcome to the inner workings of my mind. The thoughts and emotions I battle and the imaginary scenarios I dream up sometimes. Think of this is as my own public diary. . I will warn there are some themes surrounding mental health, self harming thoughts and actions, and talk of traumatising events. Please check tags for trigger warnings.Complete
Release
This is a collection of my writing from the past 7 years. Before I started to write, I was a very lost individual, as are most teens, but I was lost in darkness. I was too afraid to move anywhere at all. I hid in the dark, debilitated by my own anxiety, sadnesses, anger, and hopelessness. I was desperate to be loved and feared it the most, I was a coward, I was self-destructive, I would mentally bend my thoughts to the point of bordering insanity. I was born into this world alone, and got too comfortable with it. Maybe I still am, but a fraction of what I used to be. This writing is extremely vulnerable, and potentially disturbing to others, as all my weaknesses, strengths, obsessions with making every moment sentimental, the sickening desperation I've had, the destructiveness, and the constant brutal reconstruction of my mind. Without guidance, it's been absolute intense chaos. Though, there is beauty in the darkness. Everything can be found in the darkness. You'll find that through my writing, I've somehow slowly become exactly what I've written. A living representation of my writing and what I wanted to be. Without myself even knowing it. A lot of my writing themes are based around nature, or some kind of natural aspect. The imagery I paint with natural metaphors is constant, the animals, just like you and I, the plants, and all other living things. I planted these seeds in my mind, unknowingly at the time, where I now feel the deep dark green jungle pressing at the inner walls of my skull. It's all that I want to consume my mind. There's so much to learn. The magic of nature, and it's infinite wisdom. It's as if I have been on this path all along, and I didn't even know what I was doing, yet my body and mind were passively taking care of me. Giving me and eventually showing exactly what I want, and wanted to become. I have every moment, every instance of suffering, and every epiphany to be thankful for. Soon, I'll be at peace from the raging storm.Complete![[ p o e t r y 2]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/336780532-256-k201410.jpg)
[ p o e t r y 2]
Volume II of my life's poetry work As with my first volume, these poems contain snippets of my life and my strongest emotions. Here I have opened my soul up to be read.
#44 in Poetry [4-5-17] Join me on my journey of self-discovery, my lows & my highs. I hope that I leave you feeling better. I hope that I have made you feel less lonely. This is me. This is 18 years of exploring my creativity, soul, passion, and love. This is Meraki. Thank you for your time. -Courtney Dorland follow my Instagram for excerpts and updates @poetrybycourtney
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