Exotic Drug - Sanne - Wattpad

Exotic Drug

Reads 80
Votes 0
Parts 6
Time 1h 50m

Reads 80
Votes 0
Parts 6
Time 1h 50m

Mature

abduction depression exofanfic fantasy forgiveness leader romance self-esteem

Immobile, weak and defenseless. That's how the drug made me feel.
"But without it, would I have been here right now...?"
But I beat it, because apparently I'm strong enough, because I was born to be an Exotic.
But can I beat my fear of feeling like that again? Can I beat the person who trapped me in it and has hurt me so bad, without giving in to these dark thoughts.
Without becoming a horrible person? Without changing into someone that isn't me...?
The day he looked into my eyes was the first day I was ever truly saved. My hero, my mate. He makes the good part of me stronger, he makes me something closer to happiness.
I'm not the too sweet, weak and depressed girl I used to be, now it's only a part of me, not my whole being.
But that part is still inside of me and it won't go away, no matter how hard I try. And sometimes it will come out and create chaos.

How can I help EXO-M and EXO-K to become one, -a reunited EXO- again if I can't even help myself? If I keep on telling others what to do without being able to do it myself, I'll become a hypocrite.
And then how could I ever achieve my destiny? The thing that keeps me trying and going. To be a good leader.
To be loved, respected and -if needed- even feared, without losing myself in the process?
"Mission impossible, you're accepted."All Rights Reserved

abduction depression exofanfic fantasy forgiveness leader romance self-esteem

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Finding Purpose (+18) ✔️ by ZaynismRules

***this book contains suicidal thoughts and tendencies, may not be appropriate for younger audiences*** In which she looks for the purpose of life. Lily Carter's parents died in a car crash leaving her and Laura, girl was depressed long before her parents passed away and with all the problems turning up now, Lily felt more miserable - if that's even possible. With her journey to look for life's purpose and grab the small pinch of HOPE - which is ironically her second name -, will she finally snap at the pressure and finally end it all? or will a small light lit her darkened world of grief and loneliness? * "So you know. The little goth girl who gets bullied is indeed a mess. There's this mess in her head that eats her alive everyday isn't it? What to do now Kaden? Tell the whole neighborhood and recieve an award for taking out a crazy in this world?" I spit like vomit. His eyes warmed up as I finished, "Lily. It isn't like that" "What is it then? People stopped caring... they gave up, why aren't you?" I fought my tears. "Because I feel the need to care. Did Leigh hurt you? Did she hit you?" he finally noticed the unusual redness of my cheek. I don't like the way he told me he needed to care for me. I felt like an obligation, a responsibility that he is carrying and carrying leads to getting tired and when people gets tired, they give up. I don't want them to give up on me. But they will, so it's good not to make them care for me in the first place. "I never needed anyone. I stopped needing anyone before, why start now?" I uttered the words again. Why? There is nothing to fight for. No mama. No papa. No sister to love me. No one. So why would I waste my life and the time of others to fix what is already broken - and someone who doesn't want to be fixed? If I may add. Maybe I gave up. No, scratch that. I gave up a long time ago - when my parents died, my hope and purpose went away with them.

Uncalled For Ride by chancewrites_09

"I...I don't know. All I know is I don't want this. I don't want to be on this journey." I close my eyes and let tears cast down on my cheeks. My shoulders are shaking. My stomach is knots. I can't believe this is happening. How...why is it to me? What did I do wrong? "Hey, it will be okay," I look up and glare at Kian or whoever his name was again. "How?" I narrow my eyes at him. "How will it be okay?" He purses his lips making me glare at him even more. But no matter what, I can't pretend like I'm not breaking inside. The news hurts. I don't think I have ever hurt in my whole life. I thought my mother's death hurt me beyond repair and scared me. But that was before I got to this point in life. I lower my head again, as I am overwhelmed again by my pitiful situation. I don't want to be on this ride.

Scars by SarahORawe4

"If I risk it all, could you break my fall? How do I live? How do I breathe? When your not here i'm sufficated. I wanna feel love, run through my blood. Tell me is this where I give it all up? For you, I have to risk it all, Cuz the Writing's on the Walls." This is a story about a boy and a girl. She loves him, and he want's her dead. But he vowed to keep her safe..But how can he keep such a dangerous vow? *EXCERPT FROM BOOK BELOW* "Our story is like the movies. The movies with the happy endings?" I yelled as he got out of the car. "No! Our ending is nothing like those movies Vana. Our story is the both of us risking it all and then ending up right next to Kyle." He said and sighed. And he was right. Our ending is that one fucked up movie that no on wants to go see. "SO YOU AREN'T WILLING TO RISK IT ALL!?! I yelled louder as the rain came pouring down. He turned on his heal and stomped twords me pulling me close to him leaveing no space between us. His lips came crashing down on mine making the butterflies in my stomach errupt with pleaseure. He pulled away and sighed as did I. He grabbed my hand and ran his thumb over the knuckle of my thumb over my tattoo thanks to his stupid game of dare or dare. "Look at the perspective of things Vana. You might see a smily face but I don't. I see a sad face. You don't want my happy ending. Trust me." He said and sighed again. "I love you so much Vana." He said and kissed the top of my head and then walked back over to his house. But he didn't really love me. If he did he would be willing to risk it all just like I am. But I am left just like Kyle had suspected. Alone and heart broken in the rain. Because I was always the one willing to risk it all. For him.

Will i be fix by nightvenoms

(Flash back) Ivy you know I love you right? I had looked him in his eyes as I as I reply, "Yes silly of course I know that you love me. But right after I had said that he made a face at me. But this wasn't no normal face he really did look hurt after I had said that. I wonder why he had made that face at me. For what had seemed like a really good minute he didn't reply to me I was starting to think that he wasn't going to respond back to me then he open his mouth but the words that came out of it cut my heart in a million pieces. "Look Ivy I bought you hear to tell you something very important." Before I could say anything he sudenly said as fast as he can, "Look Ivy I bought you hear to tell you that I am moving." Right after he had said that it was my turn to give a face but unlike his my face wasn't sad at that exact moment my face was more on the confused side. Wait no this couldn't be happening he is my best friend he can't just up and leave me right? I got pulled out of my thoughts when I realized that tears was rolling down my face. He try to hug me but I couldn't do it. I couldn't just hug him like everything is ok. Because everything wasn't okay. And I didn't want to be the one to say good bye. (End of flashback)

The Wish of a Broken Heart by LovelyLotus84

They say, "Be careful what you wish for." They say, "There's truth to every story." They say, "Karma's a B***h." A heart's wish is a powerful thing. But magic doesn't exist. Or so I thought. Now, a troll has found me. ************* Cara I can't... It hurts... Why? Am I not good enough? Not pretty enough? What did I do to be betrayed like this? I feel numb except for the gaping hole in my chest. The darkness starts creeping in. I wish... Heavens how I wish... Friday June 13th I don't know when, how, or why I ended up where I am, but here I am. As insane as it sounds, I am no longer on earth. I think. Maybe I'm dead. Or maybe I'm in a coma! One where I can feel a hell of a lot of pain and new scents are being created? Maybe, just maybe, I should have listened to Grandmother's crazy stories of magic in our blood and being careful what we wish for. They don't sound so crazy anymore. All I know is I'm on the ground, can't move, staring up at an impossibly blue sky through broken branches of trees I've never seen before. That's saying a lot. Botany is my favorite hobby. I think I have internal bleeding from falling through the three-story tall trees like a pinball. My only regrets are knowing my Mum will be in a panic, won't quit searching, and my sweet American Pit Bull Terrier, Nimuë, fell through with me. ************* Tavirian Our laws are clear. If we find any creature wounded past the point of healing, we kill them. It's a mercy. We've gotten a reputation for being ruthless and cannibalistic because of it. Hundreds of years ago, perhaps, but not anymore. I'm still a monster. I'm on my ancestral pilgrimage to present the spirits with my potential brides. I'm not thrilled with my options. My mate is out there, but the elders are pushing me to take one of our Tribe. When we come across a nearly dead, tiny human and her creature, I can't kill them. Especially now. I can use the pilgrimage to save them for now, but I'll need help.

She's Married To Rasmus✔️ by marsntalwrites

Rasmus was shocked when he saw me and it was as if he saw a ghost. Fuck! Why did you do this to me! You said you didn't have a relationship with her but now it's clear to me! I can see it with my own two eyes that they love each other! "Sheryl." He softly said my name. He stood up causing his woman to move away from him. "Look it is not what you think.." I don't know if I was imagining it because I just saw his emotion as if he was afraid and feel sorry for me or sad. "Ras stop it! What are you talking about? We kissed didn't we? Why do you have to explain to her?!" His woman seems annoyed. Rasmus couldn't take his eyes off me and even surprised his woman when he pulled back his arm that was holding her. He slowly walked towards me. My tears just continued to fall and my vision was blurred because of the tireless release of water from my eyes "Hey, I don't know how to explain this but believe me I didn't kiss her." He still managed to lie in front of me?! My fists clenched. I just smiled bitterly at him before I turned and ran out of the house. I didn't look at him again and I know he followed me because I heard him calling my name. I can barely see the road I'm running to because of my blurred vision. It hurt so much! It's like I'm slowly being crushed by this disease. Why did I love someone like him and why didn't I love Tristan? He is better over him! Why is the world so unfair?! Why me?! I was deaf and I couldn't hear anything because my mind was consumed by emotions. I don't know if this road I ran is still right. I suddenly came back to my thoughts when I heard a loud beep of a car. The last thing I saw was Rasmus' shocked eyes as he ran towards me. It happened so fast, I didn't realize that I was hit by a car, thrown in the air and fell it caused my vision to darken. ******** Mature content | R18+ Highest rank #1 - hates

Word Of Action!✔️ by saraqat

-I am not good at giving descriptions but please give my story a chance- "He was the calm and she was the storm." They always say, loving someone would turn your life upside down in a good way but I believed that it's the opposite of good, and guess what? I was right. Love was always out of my mind. I drink, eat, and breathe my work I'm the definition of work alcoholic it's the truth. Then one day when I entered this case I knew that it will let me get where I want but for the first time in my life I was wrong. I failed! Not in my work, I failed in my life and I think I deserve it. My dad always tried gaining control over me and I hated it. One day I became sick of my dad's controllers over me so I decided that no one other than me would be in control of my life. Since that day I took the remote control of my life, emotions, tears, future, work, and anything that would pop out in my mind. If you wonder what happens if I wasn't in control the answer is I don't know or let me say I didn't know! Till one day I lost the remote control and it ended up pretty bad! I don't fear love, I fear the idea of someone else having control over my heart & feelings because you never know if the person will cherish you and never break you, or maybe it's only me. I don't trust people it's a survival instinct. And me being a controlling freak over everything doesn't make it any better for me! Love is like a drug, when you have it you feel at the highest place in your life but when you lose it you'll feel miserable, that's what I learned from my story of love. If I lost Serkan I know that I'll break apart and never be the same because I love him so deeply, he's engraved in my heart. And like that when I married Serkan it was like signing a deal with the devil himself. The name of the story has a deep meaning you come to know in the story. ** The story is under editing **

Whispers Of Unseen Wounds by xainakevisa

"The feelings I thought were gone are resurfacing inside me. Why do these emotions keep haunting me, bringing back memories I don't want to relive? I told myself I shouldn't let these thoughts bring more troubles into my life, but even now, when I remember the last time I saw him, those feelings came rushing back". .......Then I snapped back from my thoughts. ___

I Am Bree - Book 1 by WriterByNight12

****Copyrighted**** 'Tell me you don't feel it.' He whispered against my lips, and the trembling that had ceased at the feel of his lips against mine began again with renewed vigor. 'Tell me it's not what you want, and I'll go. You'll never have to see me again.' Swallowing, I looked up at the eyes that had entranced me from the start. I took in his every feature, slowly and deliberately. I thrilled at the feeling of his arms enfolding me, and I inhaled his familiar scent with a trembling breath. And then, then I did the most foolish thing imaginable: I flung my arms about his neck and kissed him with all that I had, almost losing myself in the safety and security I felt. But more than that, I ran. I took his moment of shock, the slight loosing of his arms about me, and tore myself away from him, shoving out the door and into the rain. I suppose I'll never know why he didn't follow me. It was the thing I feared most. I knew that if he came for me a second time, I wouldn't be able to say 'no'. I wouldn't be able to run. But I had to. I had to go. I couldn't let him be hurt because of me. He would live on now, and I would marry another. I had leased my last bit of passion in that one moment in his arms, and as I made my way through the dark streets, I felt myself become dull and lost like the creatures bound in the menagerie. **Much of this was written when I was younger and then I came back later and finished it. There will likely be mistakes. Lots of them.

In Shadows of Night by dstry0515

I woke to a sudden breeze invading the warmth from the heavy blanket that caressed my skin. Here, alone with my thoughts, the still, calm quiet in the atmosphere is almost painful. I feel suffocated in the clingy, static air. In quiet, still moments like these, I can almost feel Him. I don't know who "Him" is, but I can feel his presence. It's almost calming, especially on fearful, anxiety fueled nights. Usually, he was the strongest when I had a nightmare. The nightmares weren't as common now, but, right after everything happened, I was having them every night. I'd wake up and swear I was drenched in blood, my eyes and lips sticky, my nose filled with the smell of iron and fuel. After everything, that's when Him first came. From there, he just never left. I can usually sense when Him is near. Today, though, his presence is stronger. I can almost feel Him next to me, weighing down the mattress. Some nights, I roll over and imagine how he looks, envision his smile or the sparkle in his eyes. He's never there and I'm left clutching to the thought that he exists, staring into empty air. Tonight, though, I swear I can reach out and touch him. Extending my hand gently, I sweep my hand out into the darkness and meet an inexplicable warmth. A scream rips from my lungs as hands cover my face and two icy blue eyes stare back at me, daring me to speak again. A soft cloth caressed my nose and mouth before I felt myself fade into bed. All Rights Reserved. Contains graphic descriptions of violence and assault. Contains battle scene.

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Slide 1 of 10

Finding Purpose (+18) ✔️ cover

Uncalled For Ride cover

Will i be fix cover

The Wish of a Broken Heart cover

She's Married To Rasmus✔️ cover

Word Of Action!✔️ cover

Whispers Of Unseen Wounds cover

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In Shadows of Night cover

Finding Purpose (+18) ✔️

this book contains suicidal thoughts and tendencies, may not be appropriate for younger audiences In which she looks for the purpose of life. Lily Carter's parents died in a car crash leaving her and Laura, girl was depressed long before her parents passed away and with all the problems turning up now, Lily felt more miserable - if that's even possible. With her journey to look for life's purpose and grab the small pinch of HOPE - which is ironically her second name -, will she finally snap at the pressure and finally end it all? or will a small light lit her darkened world of grief and loneliness? * "So you know. The little goth girl who gets bullied is indeed a mess. There's this mess in her head that eats her alive everyday isn't it? What to do now Kaden? Tell the whole neighborhood and recieve an award for taking out a crazy in this world?" I spit like vomit. His eyes warmed up as I finished, "Lily. It isn't like that" "What is it then? People stopped caring... they gave up, why aren't you?" I fought my tears. "Because I feel the need to care. Did Leigh hurt you? Did she hit you?" he finally noticed the unusual redness of my cheek. I don't like the way he told me he needed to care for me. I felt like an obligation, a responsibility that he is carrying and carrying leads to getting tired and when people gets tired, they give up. I don't want them to give up on me. But they will, so it's good not to make them care for me in the first place. "I never needed anyone. I stopped needing anyone before, why start now?" I uttered the words again. Why? There is nothing to fight for. No mama. No papa. No sister to love me. No one. So why would I waste my life and the time of others to fix what is already broken - and someone who doesn't want to be fixed? If I may add. Maybe I gave up. No, scratch that. I gave up a long time ago - when my parents died, my hope and purpose went away with them.