Start Fresh || j.c. (ON HOLD)
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- Parts 9
Death sings to me as I rest my head on the soft delicate cushioning I call my bed. the feeling of wanting to feel nothing at all. Looking in the mirror and wishing you saw a beautiful model instead of the horrendous beast you imagined yourself to be. This is the feeling I wanted to go away. I felt that if I ever opened up, nobody would really care and turn there back on me. why would they care about my problems. they don't have to deal with them, because that's the thing they are my problems. My name is Marisa Adams and this is my story.
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"and you left me with bad habits like cracking my knuckles and wearing your sweater because the smell of you still lingers. you left me chewing at the skin of my skin on my lips because maybe just maybe if it's gone the taste of you will be too, but the problem is i can't tear off my skin. so i'm left with the shivers down my spine when my body remembers your hands running up my back as you kissed me and it paralyzes me because i miss it. i miss you. i miss smiling between kisses because damn you just made me happy and I thought I made you just as happy because you would smile and whisper "what" but i would just shake my head and pull you close and it was real. it was. all of it. so why did you leave me? why?"
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