Insecure
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- Parts 1
My heart was pulsating so loudly I swore he could hear it, and I wasn't sure if it was because I was angry, worried, or nervous-- hell, maybe it was all three.
But I watched as he lifted his shirt over his head-- my throat went dry and I coughed, looking away. His abdomen was badly bruised and his lip was cut.
"Do you ever wonder if there's a better way?" I ask, my voice so small I wonder if he can actually hear it. He turns around, his blue eyes seemingly darker.
"Better way than what?" His brow is furrowed but I know he understands the context of my question.
"You know, a better way than letting people beat on you for money." I play with my hands, so I don't feel the need to look him in the eyes.
"It's easy money Ophie. I like things that come easy."
"Yeah, I've noticed."
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#205
lilycollins
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...there is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable. " Kharis, why don't you just tell me how you feel because how you act is confusing me. " I said fed up with the uncertainty of our situation. " Is there something here or am I just making a fool of myself?" I scoffed. Having said that out loud, a cloud of embarrassment built over me. Of course there was nothing between us, he wasn't capable of looking at me as anything other than an intruder to his perfect little family. He just needed a shoulder to cry on and a heart to play games with and like the fool I am, I served it up to him on a silver platter. This was nothing but a way for him to deal with the whole Kalen situation. I was just a distraction. He remained completely silent and that was a good enough answer for me. I should have crushed this stupid crush years ago. I should have never let him get this close. " Okay, " I said softly. " I get it, I was just a distraction, a way to deal with what's happening." I had to fight real hard to fight back the tears that were just begging to be let free. He doesn't deserve them, no one does!. " I should have known! " I said feeling like an utter fool. I attempted to push past him but before I could he stepped in front of me and looked me dead in the eyes. Shit, maybe I shouldn't have mentioned Kalen. He kept his eye contact as he slowly got to his knees. He's eyes were watery at this point and the guilt of mentioning Kalen was beginning to eat me up. Shit, shit! " I'm sorry, I shouldn't have..." I said getting to my knees as well. " I don't know how you've been able to over look all the shit I put you through over the years." He said with such a low tone, i don't think he was talking to me. He immediately looked away probably ashamed of himself. " I'm blackened at the heart by all the pain I caused you, so don't apologize I'm only getting what I deserve.
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