Nature’s first green is gold,
Her first hue is here to hold,
Dawn’s early leaf’s a flower,
But only so an hour,
Then leaf subsides to leaf,
So Eden sank to grief,
And dawn went down that day,
Nothing gold can stay.
I used to think of that poem as a riddle of beauty, but now it only keeps me awake at night, haunting me in my dreams. Memories of Johnny would flood my mind, and my healing wounds would reopen, my pain resurfacing. It never stopped. I took the long way home, so I wouldn’t have to pass Johnny’s house. It would only make things worse. It’s been vacant and abandoned ever since Johnny died. His folks skipped town soon after, didn’t tell anybody where they were going. Not that anyone cared. They had always been heartless, almost soul-less. I trudged down the alley way, and towards my house. I was exhausted from school, since I haven’t been getting much sleep.
As Ponyboy sinks deeper into his shell of depression, his life becomes ore meaningless, until one day things, once again, go too far and Pony realizes he should relish the valuably things he has left, like his brothers, and the gang. Just before his buddies, Dallas and Johnny died, they both gave him advice. The problem is, which advice should he take? THe jumpy one that loks like a scared puppy, or the hood that died galant? Ponyboy starts to doubt he made the right choice, but can he really turn his life around and live life to the fullest, instead of surviving it after he's gotte in so much trouble?