The twenty times I tried to kill myself
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  • Reads 11
  • Votes 0
  • Parts 1
  • Time <5 mins
Ongoing, First published Mar 14, 2018
** TRIGGER WARNING ** This story will include suicide attemps so please, if you think that this could even slightly trigger you in any way, I would ask you not to read it; and stay strong, you are fabulous. I don't mean any harm by writing this and I would not like for anyone to feel hurt by it or take it in the wrong way.

So this is my story. Everything I'm about to tell you is true, and I hope you trust my words but I wouldn't blame you if you didn't since, let's be honest from the very start, I've lied a million times. You may wonder what my biggest lie always was, so here it goes:

"I'm okay."
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Elliot's partner was his whole world, but after Allan's death, his ghost haunts Elliot's dreams. Everyone tells Elliot to move on, but he isn't sure he can. ***** It's been a year since the love of Elliot's life, Allan, passed away. Everyone thinks he should have recovered after that much time, but Allan still haunts Elliot every night. He struggles to maintain relationships with his family, and despite a coworkers interest he can't summon up the courage to date. Elliot is living for the past, because to live for the present means he'll have to live with a hole in his heart. But the question Elliot has to face chases him through his monotonous days: is mourning Allan with everything he has truly living? [[word count: 40,000-50,000 words]]