F*ck Me (Modern Cliches, #2)
  • Reads 246,452
  • Votes 13,718
  • Parts 24
  • Time 2h 49m
  • Reads 246,452
  • Votes 13,718
  • Parts 24
  • Time 2h 49m
Complete, First published Mar 26, 2018
Book Two in the Modern Cliches series

~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey there, my name is Ethel Bethany Linde.

I am your perfectly prudish, average twenty-five year old girl. The only thing I am above average in is the fact I made it to twenty-five while still being a virgin. Yes, I managed to make it through my hormone fuelled teen years and college years with my virginity in tact. Although not for lack of trying on my part.

So with that prudish exterior, I have absolutely no fucking clue how to explain or count for the fact I lost my virginity to an Incubus who was summoned to torture and kill me, via sex. Which according to some ancient demon law means we are practically married in the (un)holy eyes of Hell.

Yes, by some unholy, cosmic act of fuckery, I accidentally married a fucking demon.

Thankfully, Mazvahr (Maz for short), was just as enthused as I was and we set upon a mission to find the man who summoned an unholy Incubus to do the dirty deed, in more ways than one, and kill him.

Stuck next to a powerful demon, who requires sex to charge him up and has a super weird rope fetish, to hunt down the asshole who did this to me, all I can say is:

F*ck me.
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