If I Only Found Myself
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  • Parts 1
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  • Reads 15
  • Votes 1
  • Parts 1
  • Time <5 mins
Ongoing, First published Apr 02, 2018
"His name is ... " or her name is.
"The name  is Ethan Bank" I said, then everyone stared at me as if I am in an interrogation room.
"I came from the States, and I only speak a little Filipino." Then the next lines were the typical nice to meet yous and 'about myself' talk.

It's irony, I talk about myself, but the truth is I don't know myself. I took very few deep breaths.

"Kuya ang dami mo naman huminga!" someone shouted at the back. 

"And I can understand  Filipino, too." I said. "Oh and one last thing, I have arrhythmia, and doctors said that my heart is weak. So breathing  is my control with the rhythm of my heart."

They all look shocked. I got back into my seat

I sighed.
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Elliot's partner was his whole world, but after Allan's death, his ghost haunts Elliot's dreams. Everyone tells Elliot to move on, but he isn't sure he can. ***** It's been a year since the love of Elliot's life, Allan, passed away. Everyone thinks he should have recovered after that much time, but Allan still haunts Elliot every night. He struggles to maintain relationships with his family, and despite a coworkers interest he can't summon up the courage to date. Elliot is living for the past, because to live for the present means he'll have to live with a hole in his heart. But the question Elliot has to face chases him through his monotonous days: is mourning Allan with everything he has truly living? [[word count: 40,000-50,000 words]]