All The Roasts
- Reads 32,570
- Votes 829
- Parts 118
CONTENT WARNING: This is a roast and comeback book so there is swearing and darker topics.
This is a collection of roasts, comebacks and just general attitude I've either read on the internet or made up myself. Feel free to use them!
Also sorry if there's any grammar, spelling or punctuation errors, I wrote this a couple years ago so I can't guarantee the quality.
The cover art (kousuke) isn't mine it's Fanart that I found on ig that was so beautiful I felt it needed to be on the cover. (@mystic_celly is their username on ig)- that may not be their current username but I'm not sure.
Start: April 21 2018
Finish:
All Rights Reserved
#35
salty
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Hello! This is my first book so there will probably be some Errors but i'll try my best to fix it. Also English is not my native language so pardon my bad grammar😅😅😅 . Anyway here are some keywords: (Y/N) = Your Name (L/N) = Last Name (H/C) = Hair Colour (H/L) = Hair Length (F/C) = Favourite Colour (S/F/C) = Second Favourite Colour (F/F) = Favorite Food (F/D) = Favourite Drink (F/S) =Favourite Sweet (B/N) = Brother's Name (M/N) = Mother's Name (F/N) = Father's Name __________________________________________________________________________________ You're on college btw and (Y/N) is female. here's a peek at my book. _________________________________________It was a sunday morning and you were making lunch for you and you're roommates. Suddenly you got a call from the headmaster saying that you and your roommates would be having a new roommate and that they would be arriving after lunch. ~Time Skip~ You were playing video games on the couch when you heard a knock on the door. You were confused on why there were knocking on the door because it was Sunday and most of the students were out doing god knows what. Then you suddenly remembered that the headmaster told you that you were having a new roommate today. You opened the door and you see a cute half human half demon boy. "Oh! You must be our new roommate. Nice to meet you, My name's (Y/N) (L/N)." You introduced yourself. "Sup cutie. The names Selever nice to meet you." ............... That's all folks! If you want more of this story, I suggest you read this book. Edit: Just a fair warning. Some chapters may have been jumbled Because of an error so please check the chapters before you read them please.Complete
bakudeku {18+ shots}
Hello everyone! This is a BKDK book (God please forgive me) I am a female writer!!! PLEASE ENJOY AND READ BELOW!! love you! 4-16-23 : 10.3k reads! Omfg i love y'all and I hope you guys keep reading and stay tune you hornsters😽(2025 me; oh my god i'm in tears why would i write that.) 4-19-23: 11.8k...omg I love everything single one of you 3-1-25: I'm fully back with motivation! ---------------------------- Book includes (UPDATED VERSION): -My au (Alternative Universe) (both main characters age ranges 21+ when nsfw chapters but age may change throughout other topics or story plots. I may bring up random oc's) -Random story plots (mafia, school, hero's but these includes a bunch of mha charecters!) -LGBTQIA+ - 18+ NSFW content (smut/heavy smut) -Explicit language - Heavy topics related to: suicide, sh, abuse, use of drugs + alcohol mentions) ****most likely on story plot chapters If you are uncomfortable with these inclusions, i suggest you to read the softer chapters that mention "fluff" next to the story title -------------------------- ⚠️THESE CHARACTERS DO NOT BELONG TO ME⚠️ ⚠️IF YOU ARE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THESE INCLUSIONS, I SUGGEST YOU NOT TO READ OR READ THE SOFTER CHAPTERS THAT HAS "fluff" NEXT TO THE TITLE⚠️ ---------------------------- published: 03/18/22 comeback: 03/01/25 ------------------------------ Thank you -pretty (Also did you eat or drink water today?? If not GO DO IT!!! you need to stay energized <333)
AngryHugs Oneshots!!
The cover art isn't mine! Requests are closed until further notice, sorry!!![Jade Locust Among Gold Silk [OC Insert x LMK]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/343616624-256-k139339.jpg)
Jade Locust Among Gold Silk [OC Insert x LMK]
{Since I, the creator am extremely burnt out and out of ideas, take an LMK self-insert} [NONE OF THESE PICTURES ARE MINE UNLESS I CALIM THEM. That includes the cover] ------- "Sen it's time to go!" "Coming!" I responded closing the LMK edit I was enjoying, Summer break finally was here and I was too excited to see my little sister! Finally everything was coming together! _____ My lungs ache and clench desperately as I fail to open my eyes, soaked in blood and debris I can feel everything I ever hoped for leaving me... Nora...I'm so...so- _____ "..." I exhale somberly as I flex my fingers to their best of limits, till the thick gauze and bandages force me to relax... How come I remember everything that happened? That doesn't really happen in resurrection right? Aren't I supposed to forget my past life? Well, I do still have my phone...and I look almost identical to before... Did I even die? Or did something else happen in those few seconds? _____ A seemingly normal yet depressed teen, only 19 and a half... Summer break should've been the beginning of blessing after blessing... But this was a nightmare...one that she somehow coped with...and continues to. _____ 'I don't have time to cry anymore-! Their gone! I'm dead! I'm just a dead memory to them now! It's not like mom will miss me!' _____ "Look kid, the more you grumble about how bad life was to you, maybe you should- "Should what? Let loose? Have fun? Be an impulsive jerk-!?" It was obvious my snap back caught the legend off guard, but...I didn't care... I don't care... _____ "Look MK...There's nothing you can do to help me, your a hero......not a god." _____ 'OH GOD HE'S HOT-!!' _____ One summer, one train wreck, a few bad discussions, and a lot of kettle chips. The Jade Locust will continue the fester and devour your soul... I will make sure of that. _____ Hehe, Writers block go BRRRRRR [Started: June 9, 2023] [Ended:June 26, 2023] Note: I've now made Sen 19 years old.Complete![Ereri And Riren [ONESHOTS]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/159006618-256-k551923.jpg)
Ereri And Riren [ONESHOTS]
Again this is sexual content hope you understand that but please keep in mind that I've been working on all of these OneShots so please no hate but if I have errors you may let me know but no trashy words like swearing please that's allComplete
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(Highest ranking #2 in marysue) [previously titled "marysue roasts"] *warning* If you are a sensitive little child don't read this book, you'll probably end up crying... AND READ MY DISCLAIMER FIRST!! Basically, you can send me whatever you want and I'll do a rating/rant/give my opinion on it:)) but don't worry you still can send me ocs to rate Examples of things you can send: Ratings: ocs, book, au etc... Rant:anything cringe worthy Opinion: anything really(fandoms,idk food???)Complete
Cold, so what? (Min Yoongi ff) ✔️
"You've fallen for me, haven't you?" He said so sure of himself, even if the told the truth "I have higher expectations than this" I said while pointing at him "Waa, so cold" he shrugged pretending it was cold "So what?" I asked coldly "I like it" [#48 Hospital - 12/8 - 2018] [#5 nurse - 20/7 - 2019] [this is my own story and my own ideas] [slow updates!] [first ff so I may be bad at this!] PS: This book was written when I was younger and therefore it is poorly written and has many grammatical mistakes! And I haven't had time to edit it yet.Complete
Dnf/Karlnap(ity) Oneshots
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Wisps: Recollection (Ninjago X Reader)
Chapters 19-65 are rewritten(will edit/rewrite 1-18). Chapters greatly rewritten will have a "*" around the *title* so old readers can scroll to the bottom see the changes=========== "Overseer." "...yes?" you timorously answered to that title. One you've forgotten. As with everything else. Your titles are what's left, added to the growing pile. Pierced and stamped on you, all of them lose their meaning with each use. Whether that was "demon" or "traitor" or "friend". They may as well have the same definition for someone like you. As strung along as a forgotten flake of snow in this mountain's gale. You were starting to tire of it. But then again... 'How did I get here on that alone?' ------------------------------------------------ Contains graphic descriptions of violence. Reader is gender neutral. I drew the cover image ;3
Hello! This is my first book so there will probably be some Errors but i'll try my best to fix it. Also English is not my native language so pardon my bad grammar😅😅😅 . Anyway here are some keywords: (Y/N) = Your Name (L/N) = Last Name (H/C) = Hair Colour (H/L) = Hair Length (F/C) = Favourite Colour (S/F/C) = Second Favourite Colour (F/F) = Favorite Food (F/D) = Favourite Drink (F/S) =Favourite Sweet (B/N) = Brother's Name (M/N) = Mother's Name (F/N) = Father's Name __________________________________________________________________________________ You're on college btw and (Y/N) is female. here's a peek at my book. _________________________________________It was a sunday morning and you were making lunch for you and you're roommates. Suddenly you got a call from the headmaster saying that you and your roommates would be having a new roommate and that they would be arriving after lunch. ~Time Skip~ You were playing video games on the couch when you heard a knock on the door. You were confused on why there were knocking on the door because it was Sunday and most of the students were out doing god knows what. Then you suddenly remembered that the headmaster told you that you were having a new roommate today. You opened the door and you see a cute half human half demon boy. "Oh! You must be our new roommate. Nice to meet you, My name's (Y/N) (L/N)." You introduced yourself. "Sup cutie. The names Selever nice to meet you." ............... That's all folks! If you want more of this story, I suggest you read this book. Edit: Just a fair warning. Some chapters may have been jumbled Because of an error so please check the chapters before you read them please.
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