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Dead Short

Dead Short

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    Parts 11
WpMetadataReadComplete Mon, Jun 4, 20181h 10m
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Death! Zombies! Cannibalism! Grapefruits! This collection of darkly humorous short stories and narrative poems, from the co-writer of iBooks best selling book of lies and misinformation 'Not A Lot Of People Know That', has a little something for everyone (unless you happen to be a perfectly sane and well balanced individual). In 'Death After Life', a lowly supermarket shelf stacker chokes to death on a peanut during a zombie outbreak, and is rather disappointed to learn he still has to go in to work the next day. In 'Blue Murder', a shipwrecked Englishman learns there's only one thing worse than being stranded alone in the middle of the ocean, and that's being stranded in the middle of the ocean with a ravenous American. In the deeply romantic love ballad 'Butt Ugly' a man attempts to come to terms with the fact that his girlfriend's not quite the looker she used to be, since she lost her face in an office shredder. All this, and more!
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Eve

-Featured Story -Wattys 2016 Winner Eve's a vegan zombie, and she really doesn't care what you think of it, so shush it. All she wants is to get by and find some pigeons or a fat rat - anything without a name she can eat before she starves to death in What's-Left-of-Los-Angeles, California. Because I don't care what you say, she's NOT eating humans. It's gross. Levon's weird and has a funny voice. Or maybe it just sounds funny when he hears it. Everyone's voice is funny when they hear it recorded, right? Anyway, he's like one of the only people who hasn't turned into a zombie since the outbreak, and even he has no idea how that happened. He thinks it's gross to eat people too. But he also thinks it's gross to eat pigeons and rats, so there's that. And now that they've found each other in the wasteland, Levon's plan is to carry Eve with him across the country to the army shelter in New York that totally exists and will save them both. Eve's plan is to keep her eyes from rolling into her skull every time Levon opens his mouth.

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