Why am I still alive? - arwyne - Wattpad

Why am I still alive?

pineappletherese

Reads 166
Votes 12
Parts 29
Time 6m

Reads 166
Votes 12
Parts 29
Time 6m

pineappletherese

depression hatersgonnahate minyoongi playersgonnaplay poetry toxicpeople

in a world full of toxic people, why am I still alive when I don't belong here


[HIGHEST RANKING- #5 in HATERSGONNAHATE]


may 5, 2018 || Ranked #897
may 6, 2018 || Ranked #838
may 8, 2018 || Ranked #598
may 9, 2018 || Ranked #525
may10,2018 || Ranked #604
may 16,2018 || Ranked #16
may 21,2018 || Ranked #6
may 22,2018 || Ranked #6
may 23,2018 || Ranked #9
may 23,2018 || Ranked #313 in poetry
may 24,2018|| Ranked #8
may 26,2018 || Ranked #12
may 27,2018 || Ranked #10
may 29,2018 || Ranked #16
june 1, 2018  || Ranked #24
june 3, 2018  || Ranked #12
june 23, 2018 || Ranked #25
june 27,2018|| Ranked #20All Rights Reserved

depression hatersgonnahate minyoongi playersgonnaplay poetry toxicpeople

29 parts

Sign up to add Why am I still alive? to your library and receive updates

or

#211hatersgonnahate

Content Guidelines

You may also like

The Night Sky is in Her Veins by oralie98

// s o n d e r \\ - "the realisation that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own" Life can be dark, cold and lonely. Feeling betrayed, misunderstood, chewed up and spat out by the world, its when I get sonder, that I realise I might not be as alone as I thought. This is my autobiography, in a series of harsh and delicate words, painted as a story. Includes drugs, sex, alcoholism, depression, anxiety, self harm, suicidal tendencies, assault and other hard topics, so read at your own discretion. THIS IS THE TRIGGER WARNING. I wrote it, with the intention that, if there are people in the world who feel alone and misunderstood just like me, and can benefit in any way by relating to my stories in my poems, then I have done at least one thing right. Highest rankings: #1 in poetry 07/05/2021 #1 in poetry 26/11/2021 #1 in slampoetry 07/05/2021 #1 in sonder 08/05/2021 #1 in sonder 06/12/2021 #2 in slampoetry 25/11/2021 #2 in slampoetry 01/12/2021 #2 in slampoetry 06/12/2021 #2 in sonder 27/11/2021 #2 in sonder 01/12/2021 #3 in slampoetry 06/07/2021 #3 in sonder 30/09/2021 #3 in sonder 25/11/2021 #3 in sonder 11/12/2021 #4 in slampoetry 24/11/2021 #4 in slampoetry 03/01/2022 #5 in melancholy #6 in sadness #11 in poetry #11 in alcoholism #21 in smoking

paracosm-delusional nightmares by paracosmic_being

{poetry : completed} "𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐤𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐞." in a tiny corner of the world, but in the vast corner of my imagination, this is my paracosmic delusion, something that i've created out of indignant, dejected and euphoric emotions. each word in this book constitutes my delusional nightmares, the ones that i know aren't really there, yet i write about them anyway. this is me, my barest and deepest feelings, and my monstrous thoughts. ✦✦✦ {all rights reserved || ©2021, ashe} {published on may 30, 2021} {cover designed by @paracosmic_being} {peace \/}

Mind {Prose Vol. 2}✔ by FriendlyDragon478

❝In my mind, there is pain. I am exhausted. I feel defeat from my hair tips to my feet- my body feels the stress weighing down on my shoulders. I try and try every day, but nothing seems to go my way. In my mind, there is pain, yet I try because one day, I will feel great. The body, mind, and soul are connected, and it is up to us to determine how to respect them.❞ - Me These writings are my observations and perspectives, some full of laughter and fun, others painful and dark, suffocating, leaving me with nowhere to run. ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿ A collection of unedited poems I wrote extemporaneously (ages 16-18), as well as a chockfull of quotes. This books contains my: Poems 105- & Quotes 96-175. Formerly known as: ❛My Poems and Quotes Book (Vol. II),❜ 2017-2020. Volume Two of My Poems and Quotes. Feel free to check out Volume I, labelled as ❛Body,❜ on my profile. Don't forget to vote and comment; I love engaging with you guys! :D ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝙾𝚛 𝚃𝚑𝚊𝚝 by Ja1dasjourn4ll

𝖭𝖺𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗂 𝗂𝗌 𝗂𝗇 𝗁𝖾𝗋 senior𝗒𝖾𝖺𝗋 𝗈𝖿 𝗁𝗂𝗀𝗁 𝗌𝖼𝗁𝗈𝗈𝗅 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗆𝖾𝖾𝗍𝗌 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗇𝖾𝗐 𝗉𝖾𝗈𝗉𝗅𝖾. 𝖲𝗁𝖾'𝗌 𝗍𝗈𝗋𝗇 𝖻𝖾𝗍𝗐𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝗍𝗐𝗈 𝗉𝖾𝗈𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝖲𝖾𝗏𝗒𝗇 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖩𝖺𝗒𝗏𝖾𝗈𝗇. 𝖤𝗏𝖾𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝗈𝗎𝗀𝗁 𝖲𝖾𝗏𝗒𝗇 𝗌𝖼𝗋𝖾𝗐𝗌 𝗎𝗉 𝗆𝗎𝗅𝗍𝗂𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝗍𝗂𝗆𝖾𝗌 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗄𝖾𝖾𝗉𝗌 𝗀𝗈𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖻𝖺𝖼𝗄 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗌 𝗁𝗂𝗆. 𝖡𝗎𝗍 𝖩𝖺𝗒𝗏𝖾𝗈𝗇 𝗂𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗒𝗍𝗂𝗆𝖾 𝖲𝖾𝗏 𝖽𝗈𝖾𝗌 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗐𝗋𝗈𝗇𝗀. 𝖲𝗈 𝗐𝗁𝗈 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗂𝗍 b𝖾? 𝖳𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗈𝗋 𝖳𝗁𝖺𝗍

Words Unspoken by shadowofthoughts

There is a community of the spirit. Join it, and feel the delight of walking in the noisy street, and being the noise. Drink all your passion, and be a disgrace. Close both eyes to see with the other eye. Open your hands, if you want to be held. Sit down in this circle. Quit acting like a wolf, and feel the shepherd's love filling you. At night, your beloved wanders. Don't accept consolations. Close your mouth against food. Taste the food. You moan, "She left me." "He left me." Twenty more will come. Be empty of worrying. Think of who created thought! Why do you stay in prison when the door is so wide open? Move outside the tangle of fear-thinking. Live in silence. Flow down and down in always widening rings of being. There's a strange frenzy in my head, of birds, flying, each particle circulating on its own. Is the one I love everywhere? Drunks fear the police, but the police are drunk too. People in this town love them both like different chess pieces. ----------------------------------- All things that we hide in our hearts eat us alive. This book is - full of emotions, love, care and agitation. Well, you need to read this to know what's in. Moreover, It consists of quotes, snippets, poems, bits of advice...Ummm simply deep and random stuff. Go Ahead! HIGHEST rank #1 in poetry as of 19.02.2018 ----------------------------------- 4/10/17 --- 19/04/18

Trapped in my own head by WildImaginations16

She is an outcast. She finds it easier to express what she feels in the form of writing. Whether it is poems, letters or long texts. These are poems that she writes trying to describe how it feels to live with certain mental health issues, in a world that disregards outcasts. So, these are on the darker side of the spectrum. Some poems might be distressing for some readers. I personally enjoy consuming dark content, it's kinda like a coping mechanism. I really hope none of you relate with any of these :) I'll be posting only poems here, I'll try to be as active as I can. The poems are not in any order. They are just the thoughts that pop up any time of the day. (8.11.2023) PS: Please check out 'safe space'. I need your help to make it a real safe space, readers! Ranking: #1 shortpoem #1 distressing #1 poetry (17.1.2024) #1 poem (24.1.2024)

Words Of An Idle Mind by _theidlemind_

~this idle mind is no devil's workshop~ •••~•••~••• ||Featured on WATTPAD CHRONICLE -May2018 (wattpad's official monthly magazine)|| || Featured on WATTPAD CHRONICLE- July2018 (wattpad's official monthly magazine)|| ||Featured on @AmbassadorJP reading list (June 2018)|| ||Featured on 'Well Worth The Wait' Reading list of @UndiscoveredBooks || ||Winner of WATTFEST for JapanFest collaboration (May 2018)|| ||Winner of THE MYSTICAL AWARDS (2/6/18)|| ||Winner of The Golden Awards - Random (2018)|| •••~•••~••• *Poetry is not only about feelings, it's a religion based on views, emotions and insights.* This book is a collection of unconventional poems and excerpts. It has more than just words about love, loneliness, etc. •••~•••~••• Do give it a chance, i am sure you'll enjoy it. Please VOTE-COMMENT-SHARE as you read all the peices. Your insights on my work is like water in my bloodstream. It encourages me more to bring you better works. Highest rank: #22 In top 50 (5/4/18 - 13/5/18)

Soliloquy - A Book of Poetry by thesad_poet

𝑇𝑟𝑦𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑠𝑒𝑛𝑠𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑚𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ𝑡𝑠 𝑓𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑑 𝑖𝑛𝑠𝑖𝑑𝑒 𝑚𝑦 ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑑... "𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚑𝚞𝚗𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚝𝚢 𝚍𝚘𝚎𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚊𝚗, 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚘 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚙 𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚜𝚎 𝚊𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞, 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚊 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎 𝚗𝚘 𝚖𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚜𝚖𝚊𝚕𝚕, 𝚒𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚖𝚜𝚔𝚎𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚊𝚗." -𝚂𝚑𝚊𝚖𝚒𝚊𝚑 𝙹𝚊𝚖𝚎𝚜 𝙱𝚕𝚞𝚐𝚑 *********************************************************************** 𝙼𝚢 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜 𝚖𝚊𝚢 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚋𝚎 𝚎𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝙸 𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚊𝚗 𝚒𝚖𝚙𝚊𝚌𝚝 𝚘𝚗 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚖. 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚊 𝚙𝚘𝚎𝚖, 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕i𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚜𝚞𝚗𝚐, 𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚞𝚗𝚐, 𝚙𝚒𝚎𝚌𝚎𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚊 𝚑𝚎a𝚛𝚝...𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚙 𝚏𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐. *********************************************************************** "Beauty is not defined by your face or your clothes, Your makeup, your hair, or your skin tone. Beauty comes in different sizes, shapes and forms, Beauty should not be judged it is engraved in stone".

𝑬𝒚𝒆𝒔 𝑶𝒏 𝑼𝒔|Book 1 by nenewritesometimes

"You trust me?" I look up at him, staring into his light brown eyes that stared directly at me. It felt like he was staring into my soul trying to read me. I could barely answer his question because I was busy looking at him. Once I realized I was staring like crazy, I quickly look down. "I do." ----------------------------- She's the girl you never saw coming, the unexpected one who calms you, centers you, and still she turns out to be the surprise love of your love. She gets you, really gets you like no one ever has. She is your best friend, lover, and soulmate all wrapped in the prettiest package. She is unforgettable, she is like no one, which is why you are addicted to her mind, her soul, her body, and her presence. You can't get her out of your system. You taste her and she runs through you hot like blood and fire. She never leaves you no matter what, because she too, knows how rare the connection is. You have never had anyone stick by you like that before. She is the safest place you ever know. You are soft for her no matter how hard life gets, she is there and your feelings never change. She loves you fiercely and you feel her love deep in your bones and in your soul. She is the one who makes you feel whole in a way you never have before and that terrifies you. But, what terrifies you even more...is losing her. 03/12/21-04/25/21 Rankings: #9 in africanamerican 9-16-21 #84 in urban 9-16-21 #113 in blacklove 9-16-21 #1 in blacklovestory 9-16-21 #45 in contemporarylit 9-16-21 #18 in blackcouple 9-16-21 #218 in urbanromance 9-16-21 #1 in saveblackcharacters 9-16-21

You may also like

Slide 1 of 9

The Night Sky is in Her Veins cover

paracosm-delusional nightmares cover

Mind {Prose Vol. 2}✔ cover

𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝙾𝚛 𝚃𝚑𝚊𝚝 cover

Words Unspoken cover

Trapped in my own head cover

Words Of An Idle Mind cover

Soliloquy - A Book of Poetry cover

𝑬𝒚𝒆𝒔 𝑶𝒏 𝑼𝒔|Book 1 cover

The Night Sky is in Her Veins

// s o n d e r \\ - "the realisation that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own" Life can be dark, cold and lonely. Feeling betrayed, misunderstood, chewed up and spat out by the world, its when I get sonder, that I realise I might not be as alone as I thought. This is my autobiography, in a series of harsh and delicate words, painted as a story. Includes drugs, sex, alcoholism, depression, anxiety, self harm, suicidal tendencies, assault and other hard topics, so read at your own discretion. THIS IS THE TRIGGER WARNING. I wrote it, with the intention that, if there are people in the world who feel alone and misunderstood just like me, and can benefit in any way by relating to my stories in my poems, then I have done at least one thing right. Highest rankings: #1 in poetry 07/05/2021 #1 in poetry 26/11/2021 #1 in slampoetry 07/05/2021 #1 in sonder 08/05/2021 #1 in sonder 06/12/2021 #2 in slampoetry 25/11/2021 #2 in slampoetry 01/12/2021 #2 in slampoetry 06/12/2021 #2 in sonder 27/11/2021 #2 in sonder 01/12/2021 #3 in slampoetry 06/07/2021 #3 in sonder 30/09/2021 #3 in sonder 25/11/2021 #3 in sonder 11/12/2021 #4 in slampoetry 24/11/2021 #4 in slampoetry 03/01/2022 #5 in melancholy #6 in sadness #11 in poetry #11 in alcoholism #21 in smoking